Has anyone had a DC go into year 7 knowing no one else?

Yes, it is very common, a good school has methods to deal with this.

Sometimes moving up with people from primary is a negative. A clean slate and an open mind are good sometimes. Also it goves them confidence for later when they are choosing sixth form, uni, jobs as they always know they have done it.

My ds didn't know anyone.... He made a friend on induction day and they were firm friends until they left and moved away 😔 but by then he had joined clubs he was interested in and had made more friends.

My DD will only know 1 other.... She is at a 16 place primary and they're going off to 6 different schools in September so most aren't going with a close friend.

Yes, best thing that ever happened to my DD. didn't have many friends in primary then didn't get into the same secondary. I was so worried but she has the loveliest group of friends now. First friend was another girl who was in same circumstances and they stuck together and attracted others.

It's fairly normal. There were around 25 girls from DD's primary going to the same 8 form secondary, only 2 made it into her form and both were girls DD didn't like at all.

We encouraged her to talk to other girls on induction day, she took small paper slips with her mobile number with her and she kept in contact with some over the summer holiday.

She is in Y11 now and while friendships changed since Y7 there are still 2-3 girls from the beginning she hangs out with a lot.

She hardly speaks to old primary school girls at all.

Yes. She spent a long time moaning about it but by the end of y8 she wouldn't have moved even if she had the chance to. It can take a while.

DD was in that position 5 years ago. She made a best friend by lunchtime on day one, and by the end of week one had 12 good friends. Any time she saw someone else on their own she (and her growing friendship group) asked if they wanted to sit with them until their friends arrived. Some (most!) of the 12 are still good friends, including some who have since moved away. She now has 4 or 5 friendship groups and is literally never alone!
DS, on the other hand, moved to a school with several classmates. Within a month it became clear none of them were actually friends and he had a much more rocky start as a result! 6 years on, he too has found his people and he has a large friendship group both in and out of school.
My next DS is starting a different secondary in September, also alone, and I’m not worried at all.

And DD2 was separated from the one girl she did know on the transition day

My older two both started without knowing anyone (although in both cases a child -siblings- from their nursery was there) and DD2 now in year 7 knew one girl from dancing.

Honestly, it will be fine.

When I dropped DD1 off for the transition day I told the art teacher she knew no-one and he called a group of girls from a different local primary over to take her with them.

My dd will start secondary being the only one from her school going there. However, I already made an effort to find other dc going via there as well because my dd does a lot of sport and other activities. I think it helps if you manage to find out some dc going. But if not, there will be others in your ds same shoes not knowing anyone. Even if you know people you might not have them in the same class so will need to make new friends anyway.

My dd started on a random Monday in year seven. We'd just moved back from Australia, she had a dodgy Australian accent and she's black in an extraordinarily white area, close to BNP headquarters no less.

She knew nobody at all.
Her lessons that day were
French (never done it)
History (only done Australian history)
RE (never done it)
And geography where she had to label a map of the UK.

We arrived and I took her to the office - oh, she's also anaphylactic so I had a meeting with someone about that.....and a girl came down to get dd. Girl had a handbag on the crook of her arm and looked 17. Dd not sophisticated. Off they went and I had a day imaging her head being flushed down the toilets Grange Hill style.

I went to pick her up and I honestly nearly threw up in the carpark waiting.

She got to the car, opened the door and said 'is it OK if I stay and play netball, it's an hour, see you' and she was gone.

Yes, my DD did it and it was absolutely no problem. She made friends quickly from the first day and now surrounded by a lovely group of girls.

Yes my DS1 did this. The first few days were difficult but he very soon made friends. He's now 23 and has just booked a lads holiday with some of the boys he met in that year 7 class!

Induction day? Some schools use a game where they introduce themselves, and/or have a team of 3 or 6 for a task. This helps. Then then take each others phone number at lunch break, tell him to encourage this. Phone HoY now and ask what they do to help, facilitate.

Not DC but 23 years ago I went into year 7, a few people from my previous year but none from my class and certainly not friends (more like enemies!). I’m married and have two kids and just met up with 5 friends, all from high school, one from my form.

Yes, our son was the only one from his primary in his form at secondary, it was fine,no problems.

DS did that because we'd had to move out of catchment so he couldn't go where all his mates went.

He also broke his arm a week before term and couldn't write. I called the school to see what help they could provide and they said he could get a friend to write for him. I almost cried saying "her hasn't got any friends"

But he made a friend in the first day. They have been inseparable ever since and now live in a house together. So it all worked out fine.

Yeah we schlepped our kids round loads of schools

Yes. All 3 of mine. We totally spin it as a chance to make new friends in addition to the old ones.

DS (now in 1st year of uni). Rocky time in primary (bullied in y3/4). Only one from his primary to secondary.
Dd1 in y12- most girls went to one school in y7, she went to another. She chose to move to different school for 6th form too to have another chance to reinvent herself.
dd2 is only 10 and in y6. Her friends are going to about 4 different secondaries. As a class, probably about 8 or 9 different secondaries.

Kids are much better at change than we are. Best of luck to your DS.

Yes - my DS, we moved to the UK from the country of his birth in the summer before secondary. He’s doing just fine and enjoying school. One thing that I think helped is that he joined Scouts and a rugby team too - that’s given him a supply of ‘out of school’ mates too.

Yes, ds2, and he was absolutely fine. The first few weeks are a bonding experience anyway, as they find their way around the school.

@listsandbudgets yes both my sons. Ds1 is at uni and still meets up with the friends he made in the first few weeks of year 7 when everyone is home, Ds2 made friends too, has the same friendship group since year 7 and they are in sixth form together.

Check with the school what they do to facilitate those who come from non-feeder schools. At my sons' school they have the usual transition day in July where all the year 6s in their current uniform spend the day in their new form with their new teacher at the secondary. Then there was a morning, again in July specifically for the non-feeder school children, they went off and did some activities together, the parents were told that there is a week of summer stuff for these children just to help with the whole familiar face bit. School deliberately organise an activity day in September where they break up any groups of same primary school children to give them all the opportunity to make friends with other people. Sometime friendship groups from primary can be quite toxic.

Remember that at primary these children were usually in a class of 30, possibly a 2 or 3 form entry. Now they are in a secondary with hundreds of children in their year to be potential friends with. Get him to join some lunch time clubs or after school ones, gives him somewhere to go and maybe make friends there too. Secondary is an exciting time, children are looking for new friends too.

DS did as we moved to the UK, he went to a local primary for the last term of year 6 in the town we were temporarily staying, then a secondary in the next town over where we moved to. He had previously moved schools for year 5 knowing only one child in the year above so was used to it.

@listsandbudgets i was head of y7 for many years. Please don’t worry. They’ve made new friends within an hour

Yes, my dd. We moved from central London to the countryside in the summer between primary and secondary. As well as not knowing anybody, she had to get a bus 8 miles to school.
There were a few tears on the first day.....ME, not her, as I watched her get on the bus.
Some of the friends she met that first day were here last night, they all had a bbq in my garden, now aged 22/23.