Choosing local comp over private or grammar

I went to school in Burnley, where, at the time, there was a strange mix of comp / grammar.

At 11 you went to a comp. But after, what is now year 9 the top set kids had the option of going to the grammar or High school - grammar for boys, high school for girls.

Unless you had started at one of the RC schools because the RC grammar was in the next town and had gone completely comp.

So at 11 I went to the RC girls' school that had been a secondary modern. My next door neighbour and my cousin both started at another girls' comp.

At 14 my next door neighbour went to the high school, my cousin stayed in her comp and I stayed at my comp.

We left school at 16 with very similar results.

I would say send your child where they will be happy, you get one childhood it should be happy.

I also think that if you can afford private what can you do to augment a state education eg if you end up with a space obsessed teenager then how much would a trip to NASA mean to them, or a child who learns to ride and wants to continue that, or 100 other things.

My four kids all choose the local comp (5 mins walk) than a grammar (30 min bus ride) or private school. There are some good private schools about 30 mins to an hour away. ( paying for private was not an issue)
The kids were all good academically and didn't like the grammar. They all got places for sixth form and they all declined.
I think they might have got slightly better grades if they went to the grammar or to private school,and I think they would have got better support for Uni applications etc but they all did well,and went to good unis. One of my kids did medicine and got almost no help from the school but at least it was clear that we would have to sort it out ourselves.

Going to a school that is only 5 minutes walk away is amazing. All their friends were close by and it meant they could do any extra curricular activities they wanted. I didn't have to ferry them around and they didn't waste time travelling around.

I made it clear that if they chose the Comp then they would have to take responsibility for making sure they did ok in exams. I was happy to support them if they needed but it was their decision.

We live local to you, OP, and it was a big dilemma for us. We could have afforded private, just, but Forest and Bancroft are both over £20k per year so for two it would have been a big financial burden. We didn't fancy the grammar options for various reasons. So my son is at Bremer and seems to be doing ok, I think. Issues this year with low level bullying and classroom disturbance but it's ok. I do worry though that we are somehow letting him down. DH and I were both privately educated and we earn good money - I feel like we ought to be giving him the advantages we had. But DH is dead set against paying for education. I think it will work out in the end. Hopefully.

I chose a comp for my eldest over a SS grammar which he'd passed the test for. not strictly like for like though since the grammar would have been an extra c 30 minutes each way commute. also important to note that the comp he got into is a highly regarded one which streams from year 7. other aspects of the grammar I didn't like were it being single sex and very conservative culture wise (bordering on being dominated by Indian kids). would I have turned down the same grammar if the travel times had been equal? probably. would I have turned it down if the comp option had been a 'struggling' one? probably not.

we could also have gone private, but the fees, though affordable, would have been real money to us, with, for two kids, implications for retirement ages and so on. also some aspects of the culture there that'd have been a turnoff for me.

We chose a comp for DS 1. He’s really bright and could have passed the 11+ with some tutoring and we could afford private. But he didn’t fancy an exam, and we saw a lot of benefits to being educated with children from a wide range of backgrounds.

We looked around all the local comps and chose one of the less popular ones. It has loads of free clubs, good teachers and every year a clutch of children get all 8/9s in their GCSEs. It has been great for his confidence. Plenty of opportunities now he’s identified as talented in maths. He’s getting some calibration around wealth/ intellect/ family support, and realising that he’s fortunate.

Negatives - no choice of language. Extracurricular - lots going on, but aimed at giving children a try, rather than reaching a high standard.

@JassyRadlett yes I think your right it's country wide

I also think it's very easy to start to panic when other parents start talking about secondaries. Because the ones who start talking early are inevitably the ones who think all London comps are dreadful and will try and make you think the same. You have to just let it wash over you and make your own decisions when the time comes.

We probably could have afforded private school, but it would be a massive stretch so we never seriously considered it. Grammar was a possible option but we rapidly concluded it wasn't the right fit for our DC. We didn't go for our closest comp as the options were religious or no 6th form (bright child with SEN, trying to minimise transition), but we did happily choose a slightly further away comp.

Only started in Y7 but we're very happy. Wide choice of subjects. Don't seem to be plagued by the teacher shortages of some schools. No complaints at all about behaviour. Lots of clubs and they offer a ton of enrichment activities.

I really like that my London kid is going to school with a wide range of other London kids. I like that there isn't a long commute to a far away grammar. And we still have money to do other things with. Including paying for tutors if we ever think that might be needed.

It's good to keep your options open, but schools can change a massive amount. Our other preferred school was the one nobody wanted for the longest time and had been inadequate for years. It's just been upgraded to Good in the latest Ofsted and some of its stats for achievement would make most schools cry with envy. Yes it's still a very mixed school, but it's not letting kids down.

This is a very good shout. The coming Y7 is the peak year for London secondary admissions; schools that are undersubscribed now are likely to really struggle and won't be able to offer as many GCSEs, etc, if they don't have the numbers to make it financially viable.

It's not just a London issue - the overall school population is going to decline by something like 10% between now and 2030 I think? But I think London is feeling it first.

We had the choice between private and state for DS1 this year. He's bright, but ultimately we've gone with the comp. It was ultimately a choice between me staying in my current job and having lots of flexibility to support both kids, enable activities and not really have any money worries, or having to move to a much more pressurised role that would have paid school fees, but things would have been a lot tighter financially especially once both kids were at secondary.

DS1 fortunately really liked the comp we also liked, which is on a massive upswing in performance and has a lot of features that really appealed to him; he liked our preferred private school and was wowed by the facilities and I'm sure would have been happy there too.

We really weighed it up and decided that being more present, more flexible and less stressed was preferable, given the options available to us.

Wait a bit and see what schools are available nearer the time.

See where your DCs interests lie and which schools can best meet their needs.

My DC went to local grammar schools and had a choice of languages for example. The local comp only offered one language per year group.

"Latest figures from London Councils show 29 out of the 32 London boroughs are expecting a drop in demand for places in reception classes between now and 2026-27, with 7,300 fewer children needing places — a drop of almost eight per cent. The demand for year seven places in secondary schools is also forecast to drop by 3,200 pupils — or 3.5 per cent — over the same time."

my concern is the falling pupil numbers which is an issue in certain London boroughs. It hasn't yet fed through to secondaries but it soon will. The problem with falling rolls is how funding is based on headcount. I think it will create more division between schools with the good ones becoming even more desirable & the ok ones perhaps declining.

@cantkeepawayforever you put it really well - this is exactly what we try to do.

We were in a grammar school area and my DD1 passed the 11+ and got a place.. however, I declined it as it just doesn't sit right with my moral compass . She went to the comp . Remained friends with her GS friends who did go (it was sooooo important to their parents - literally ALL they could talk about from year 3 at primary..) .. her friends parents spent £££ on tutoring which in the end decided me that GS was about how much money you have to 'get them through' and not based on merit..

DD went to Durham with 2 of her former GS friends and 3 mates from the comp..

I feel smug and vindicated that GS is just private school paid by the state for the highest earners and needs abolishing completely.

How dare any government decide who deserves great education based on the ability to tutor your way through exams !

I would say keep an open mind and don't get ahead of yourself.
We ended up sending ds to a local comprehensive that we would never in a million years have considered when he was Y1 2 or even 3 at primary. Then it rapidly improved, lots of people who had not considered it sent their dc there and the school continued to improve.
We always thought we would send ds to a local (very good) private school or a super-selective, but ds ended up not liking the selective and we ended up not liking the Head at the private school! So we looked at the comprehensive and liked it and more importantly ds like it.
He did very well, 11 Grade 9's at GCSE, 4 x A* at A level and he's at Oxford.

We also felt that we could spend our money to enrich the girls lives rather than me working long hours and money being tight

We chose comprehensive. Dd1 was offered a bursary for independent (we could easily afford the payments) but due to dyslexia and at the time delays dd2 would not have got a place even full fee so we turned it down. Ironically dd2 found her groove and got higher marks than dd1 by 18! She also got a bursary for state boarding (specialist)

We are in zone 3 London, and DS went to a great state primary. Lovely class with some v bright kids. Most went on to local comp - that was our intention. However DS was marginally too far away and was allocated a school that we didn’t like. We opted for private and he’s loved it and benefited from excellent teaching. It’s been excruciatingly expensive and we’re so pleased that as he’s doing A levels this summer, the cost is ending.

going back to his friends from primary, of the 30 about 6 tried for Oxbridge. The only one who was successful was a friend who went to the school we didn’t like. That said all the others are headed to RG universities - without £££ being spent on school fees.

your decision but I’d probably advise you to opt for the comp.

@ghasia Sounds like those kids went to a spectacularly bad school. Most bad schools at least try to get the best out of their bright students and leave the middles and low attainers suffering.

It's absolutely possible for kids to do brilliantly in a comp instead of grammar/private, and you will have lots of parents come on to give you those experiences. But it's worth remembering that there is another side as well. I have a friend whose kids (super bright and very well supported at home by graduate parents) went to the local comp (no other options). And honestly, it's been rubbish. Their results have been a lot lower than their potential, but more importantly they've been left totally disillusioned by their school experience - teaching is poor with a huge staff churn, there are serious behaviour problems, and almost no extra curricular activities because the school doesn't offer much and most of the other students aren't interested anyway. Of course you can never have effective hindsight, but I suspect that if they'd gone to one of the grammars or privates around here, their experience and outcome would have been very different.

There are bad grammars and privates as well as bad comps, of course. And if you've got a good comp, then great. But as another poster said above, there are really very serious problems in education at the moment, and if you have the luxury of choice, then I would at least be keeping your options open for now, until you see how education (and your local schools) develop in the nexr few years.

It's not something we ever considered.

There is no grammar schools in my county but we could have moved to a neighbouring county if we wanted to.

Never gave private a thought as we have 2 kids and would struggle to afford it.

Both DH and I went to our local schools and that was just the done thing.

Don't feel I am letting them down. Both DH and I are well educated and got reasonably well paid jobs.

They get lots of other opportunities outside of school.

I am sure they will do OK.