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Original poster

How do Asians and East Europeans e.g. manages to successfully to get their kids to revise long hours?

159 replies

examitis · 16/05/2022 15:18

I'm not generalising here but, yeah I guess I am, based on speaking with some of my Asian and Russian friends, so am aware of how much their kids study for exams. Right through primary and now in early secondary.

Some started their revision after Christmas, others have been doing 10am-4pm stints over Easter hols preparing for end-of-year exams, on top of playing numerous instruments or sports or chess.

Before anyone says, 'poor kids, what about their social life and friends', the children I know who have a busy study schedule, all seem well adjusted. Maybe some do less sports than other kids but, on the whole, they're lovely.

A few of these kids are super bright thought most are like all the other kids in terms of ability, but they really seem to ace some of the tests (and get music exams) due to their incredible commitment and time spent revising.

Getting my kids to sit down for even an hour is like pulling teeth. One of mine is gifted but lazy!

I'd like to receive some advice on how to instill that drive and tips for how to structure revision and the after-school day. If at all possible.

Thanks.

OP posts:
Whitedamask · 16/05/2022 16:21

MolliciousIntent · 16/05/2022 16:18

Generally speaking it's due to establishing authoritarian rule from a very,very young age, positioning parents as the unquestionable authority and demanding absolute obedience with harsh consequences for deviation. They then set incredibly high standards from very young and police these stringently, so the child is conditioned to believe that the only accepted level of achievement is excellence.

I agree with this. It's not generally a UK concept. I'm sure there are some UK parents like this but I would say they are a minority.
It's a cultural thing.

GCAcademic · 16/05/2022 16:19

HowIsItMarchAlready · 16/05/2022 16:17

I was one of those kids. I wasn't allowed to leave my desk until x time and I was expected to get top grades (which I did). I did it because I wanted to do well and because I was scared of my mum's reaction if I failed. Those were the 80s and she would have told me off big time!

Same here. The answer to your question, OP is “fear”.

TibetanTerrah · 16/05/2022 16:19

Generalising, but its a culture thing. A high value is placed on education from basically birth and aspirations to become doctors or lawyers. You only have to read mumsnet, especially over lockdown, to see the attitude is let kids be kids, leave the homeschooling if you're struggling, they've had a hard time let them enjoy the summer etc etc. My opinion won't be popular and as I said it is a generalisation but it is what it is.

MolliciousIntent · 16/05/2022 16:19

MolliciousIntent · 16/05/2022 16:18

Generally speaking it's due to establishing authoritarian rule from a very,very young age, positioning parents as the unquestionable authority and demanding absolute obedience with harsh consequences for deviation. They then set incredibly high standards from very young and police these stringently, so the child is conditioned to believe that the only accepted level of achievement is excellence.

Basically if you didn't start while they were still in nappies, and if your children aren't afraid of you, you're probably shit out of luck.

MolliciousIntent · 16/05/2022 16:18

Generally speaking it's due to establishing authoritarian rule from a very,very young age, positioning parents as the unquestionable authority and demanding absolute obedience with harsh consequences for deviation. They then set incredibly high standards from very young and police these stringently, so the child is conditioned to believe that the only accepted level of achievement is excellence.

HowIsItMarchAlready · 16/05/2022 16:17

I was one of those kids. I wasn't allowed to leave my desk until x time and I was expected to get top grades (which I did). I did it because I wanted to do well and because I was scared of my mum's reaction if I failed. Those were the 80s and she would have told me off big time!

Comefromaway · 16/05/2022 16:17

You only hear about the successful ones. You don't hear about the burnout or the ones with additional needs that those systems fail.

emuloc · 16/05/2022 16:17

Err just ask your friends. And yes, you are generalising.

Innocenta · 16/05/2022 16:14

Have you asked your friends?