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DD wants to move from private to state

78 replies

SakaSpuds · 30/06/2021 09:06

DD (13) is at a very good mixed independent school.

She's asked whether we'd consider sending her to a state school instead. She's quite left wing and I think this is what's motivating it.

I've said I'll look into it but I wondered what other people thought? Issues for me are:

  • the local state schools nearby are substantially less good than her current school in terms of results (at her current school, 93% of GCSEs are 7,8 or 9, whereas at our best local state it's about 25%)
  • the facilities are much worse as is the range of subjects offered. I'm not sure she appreciates how different certain aspects will be.
  • I haven't talked to DD about this yet but of course the local state may be oversubscribed, in which case it may not even be possible or she may end up somewhere much further away. (I haven't looked into any of this yet- we've only just started talking about it.)
  • On the other hand, I respect her views and think it's an admirable position.

Struggling to see whether, as her mum, it's my job to get her the best education I can (which would mean staying where she was, which is what I would prefer) and she can make her choices for her own kids, if she has them, later. Or should I be letting her decide this?

(In terms of other reasons she might want to leave, she's in quite an intense group of friends at her current school- lots of dramas and issues- and I think she's finding that all a bit stressful. Not sure moving schools is necessarily going to help with that.)

OP posts:
meadowbreeze · 30/06/2021 09:24

I personally wouldn't move her. Is she active on social media? It's a very hard place for private school kids now. It's not popular to go to one and if you're popular and people find out, they do get the piss taken out of them.
It may be quite hard for her to settle in the state if she's been in privates a while. See point above.

00100001 · 30/06/2021 09:22

take her to visit the state schools and let her see them? then she at least has more information?

She might like the schools better or not ?

NewVariable · 30/06/2021 09:15

That's a hard one.
Friendships are difficult, but there's no guarantee she'll find her crowd in a state school either.
As for the left-leaning views, you could tell her that her state school education will be paid from the taxpayers pot. Going private she leaves a bit more funds for others. She will still be leaving in relative comfort, having access to books, tutors, experiences, etc. Her private school teachers are the same as state school teachers. Her best contribution to a better societal structure would be to get the best education she can and then use it wisely in accordance with her values.

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