Private schools must take responsibility for boys behaviour outside

I've had two emails saying I've been tagged on this thread.

I can't see where?

I think it is a society-wide issue that has existed forever but has worsened due to easy availability of really horrible porn which has become normalised. I have teen and pre-teen kids who were humming along to the WAP song for weeks (but saying wine and pizza). I think nothing will improve until we control what we as a society accept as 'normal'. You absolutely cannot hold schools solely responsible. it is up to all of us.

Turning this into a private schools issue is just plain wrong.

OK - it looked that way at the start, when EI began amongst private school pupils.

But word spread accounts flooded in, and it's perfectly clear that this is an issue for all schools

We really must not allow the impetus to be lost by focussing in the wrong place.

This is a big question about how we socialise young men.

Families are key, but wider society matters, from the porn culture, to tolerance of drinking and drugs, role models in sport and in general, and of course schools. All of them

You asked how schools could be responsible for students out of school.
You asked if this was applicable to state schools as well as private schools.
Neither of these questions involve a "product review" of a private school, and give the impression that you consider state school parents' opinions as not worth listening to, hence the "labels".

Ironically the one parent on this thread who admits having a child at an independent school, has a child at prep school - so they have no knowledge of private secondary school either. But apparently you are interested in their opinion ....

I think the point the expert made is that if you market yourself as being able to mould your characters you should actually be able to do that to some extent, otherwise it’s false advertising. Hence it doesn’t apply to state schools, which don’t have to market themselves in that way.

I think parents have a responsibility outside of school but school should seek to teach appropriate values to its pupils. With boarding schools though its a bit different during term time as then the children are under the care of the school even when out and about outside of achool hours.

That website was started by a lady who went to a private boarding school so I think the majority of comments started from the independent sector for that reason. However, I would be surprised if children were much different in the state schools!

My children are in private school (coed prep). One is headed for an all boys school that has been mentioned on that website, albeit not one that had extensive mentions. I dont have concerns about the school being at fault from what I have read on that site!

I remember my own experiences at school and some of the things that happened. It was a non posh state school. I dont think human nature has changed much judging by the postings and is probably universal in that age group (obviously not all children behaving badly but there will be some in all walks of life and all schools, I suspect). The main difference is the prevalence of phone cameras and what can be done with them which didnt exist when I was at school.

I won’t answer as I am not qualified according to your criteria to have an opinion (probably can’t spell either or present a coherent angle for debate TBH)

It's the schools that sell themselves as 'creators of character' that are being looked at, I thought?

i.e. if a school makes a claim that it will take your money and mould your son's character, then it has some responsibility to turn out a "decent type of boy" through the educational values and lessons provided, including behaviour off-site.

That's how I read the argument. Whether it's a tenable argument or not ... I make no judgement.

Why only private schools? The EI website now includes many accounts of abuse perpetrated by those at state schools, colleges, and universities.

Why only boys? I realise the majority of testimonies on the EI website are accounts of what's happened to young women, but there are also accounts of young men being subjected to abuse as well.

The media witch-hunt against boys' independent schools continues.

Hasn't this subject been debated to death on this forum already? Agree that it is an important subject, but do we really need a new thread each time a newspaper writes a new article?

crawling back into my state school parent hole

I can't read the article, but I agree this shouldn't just be private schools. Many private schools do have models that suggest that parents just send their child to them, and the school does "everything" though.

However, schools are already responsible for their pupils' behaviour out of school to some degree. All schools (state and private) issue guidance along the lines of "remember if you're in uniform, your behaviour reflects on the school". If your child is bullied by other children on the way home, by and large your first stop is for the school to sort it out. Same if your child is cyber bullied.

Of course, it's up to parents to take responsibility for bad behaviour as well, but it's surely a joint effort?

I just re-read your thread and now realise you don't want lowly state school parents to answer your thread, so I will parrot back to you "why only private school" parents?