Yr9 girl refusing school - what happens?

I work for a LA teaching students like your daughter as a kind of stop gap service while we see if they can be got back into mainstream school or whether they need alternative provision.

My experience is that some schools and senco's are great, others are mediocre and some are a hindrance to the students they should be trying to help.

You do need to start by having an honest and detailed conversation with your DD's school (possibly after a conversation with your daughter to find answers to the questions below). Does she have a diagnosis? Is there already a support plan? What are the main barriers to her getting into (and staying in) school? What might help (eg half days, favourite teachers/subjects, safe room etc)? What support does she need? What support can school provide?

I wonder why you've said she can stay off till after Easter (not in a critical way): is there something you think will change in that time? Or is it because of the state she was in when she got home? Have you sought advice from her GP for her anxiety?

There are very few students I work with who manage to get the support they need without an ehcp because schools and LA's don't have the funding to pay for more than extremely basic support unless it's mandatory.

I'd echo the pp who said the longer she's off for the harder it will be to get her back. Force the issue with the school and LA.

Are there any specific things she thinks might help? There are ways to avoid students being stuck in crowds and noise. (Letting them out of lessons at a different time, quiet space, time out cards)
School should be looking at what they can do to help. Regardless of assessment.
Does she have a good tutor, head of year or senco you could contact?
Good luck.

From a teacher pov school refusal is hard for us to deal with too. We want nothing more than your child to be in school and learning. However we also understand why that often isn't possible. School refusers do (ime) fall through the cracks somewhat. Parents either get fined for non attendance (doesn't really help anyone) or the attendance is medical coded and the student is just off for a prolonged period.

IME students who get back into school pretty quickly are more likely to stay. Would she take a part time timetable? The longer students are off, the bigger the idea of return becomes and the harder it is to deal with. Some schools can offer creative solutions, smaller classes, SEN bases, arrive/leave site outside of normal timings.

It sounds like you have grounds for an EHCP however you'd be best served if you have an assessment/diagnosis of any issues.

@BananaBreakfast, Ds is 16 and has just had a private sensory assessment that has been paid for by our local authority as part of the EHCP process. The report is really in depth and explains why he becomes so dysregulated. There are also lots of recommendations too.

The OT has said that he needs sensory integration therapy and we are hoping that he can access this via the NHS or if not extra funding through the LA.

WhoisRebecca for the first stage, an EHCNA, the only test is has or may have SEN and may need SEN provision to be made via an EHCP. DD meets this test. Any other test or hoops (school not spent £6K, not academically behind, no EP report, not had 2 cycles of assess/plan/do/review...) the LA want you to jump through are illegal. If the LA refuse to assess, as they often do, appeal, the vast majority of appeals are upheld.

I was a school refuser due to bullying and ended up in a pupil referral unit for several months. Following from that I changed school (it took a few weeks to persuade me inside) and I was fine there

I think you need to try to find out exactly what your dd is worried about. Then go and tell the school and ask them to come up with a plan to address these specific worries. So if DD doesn't like the noise, maybe she could wear ear defenders. If the playground is overwhelming, can she go somewhere quiet in break time. If she's worried about the work, what extra support can be put in place. Etc. On the whole, avoidance tends to make anxiety worse. It's probably better to see if you can work with the school collaboratively to see if you can find a way to support your dd.

WhoisRebecca, I was told by my Ds's old school he would never get an EHCP. They were not happy when we did a parental application and did everything in their power to stop it going forward and told the LA that Ds's needs were being met.

The LA send panel agreed to issue an EHCP for Ds at the end of last year, so his school were completely wrong.

We weren't fined either, I contacted EWO myself after informing school I would no longer be trying to get dd to attend even part time. They weren't interested, dd had EHCP, EWO in our LA only deal with prosecutions and LA policy states no prosecution of parents of children with EHCP.

My dd actually ran away from the school gates on Monday because she felt like she was being suffocated. I will look into an EHCP for her - I am not hopeful that she’ll get one though.

Ah ok I see. That’s understandable that you would be cautious. I wonder what the consequences were and how you could prevent them if she can’t cope in school?

To a certain extent, schools have their hands tied by the system; student doesn’t attend, parents get fined. No alternative

This is bollocks too. If your child has mental health problems and can't attend school, you can report them as unwell and they can be marked on the register as sick. We weren't fined for all the months DD was off, but we did provide medical evidence.

Dd crashed out of mainstream school, she has autism and SPD and the usual co morbids. She already had an EHCP but even with that support it wasn't enough. LA provided a tutor who taught her at home whilst we had new assessments made and waited for Tribunal. She now attends an independent specialist school and is thriving. She has been in school full time throughout lockdown, school has been open to all pupils and so it's been business as usual there which has given dd a sense of normality. The fight was hard but it wasn't right for dd to be taught at home without peers so for us there wasn't really any other option.

Soontobe60 I can only speak for my child with multiple mental health and sensory processing issues and that’s what I do

School sencos made our problems far worse and refused to help so I don’t particularly find them the best folk to listen to

All I can say is that compared with our outstanding top 100 school, Interhigh have enabled her access to education and supported all her sensory requests enabling her to achieve excellent exam results

Ultimately my answer was to ensure the original poster knows her child has options as our senco at least was aware of none and not prepared to help us even apply for an EHCP

Why would you prefer her to attend school if it makes her so unhappy? Genuine question and I think reflecting on the answer objectively will be helpful.

Banana whatever you do don't deregister. It is easier to get support when on a school roll - bluntly, you are someone's problem. If DD isn't well enough for school then the LA are required to provide education, and can be forced to do so via Judicial Review if it isn't forthcoming, but don't let anyone talk you into deregistering.

WhoisRebecca it does sound like DD needs an EHCP. You can apply yourself, IPSEA have a model letter you can use.

Soon Interhigh are one of the largest providers of online schooling, although as you say reviews are mixed. Parents seem to either love it or loathe it. BTW the "and" is between health and care, not education and health.

I have a year 10 son refusing to attend a new school. It's incredibly stressful. No diagnosis for anything however he really did change at puberty but unsure if it's anything specific?

Also looking at alternative options