G&L, CLSG, SHHS, Highgate? Your honest opinion is needed?

I have a daughter in the sixth form at CLSG. I like the new head mistress much more than the old one. The teachers are good. The girls all come by tube or bus. They would be mortified to be driven. The centre of gravity seems to be Hampsted and adjacent areas. It’s not a sporty school. A lot of families are what I would call champagne socialists. There are very rich and very poor families not so many in the middle. Tuition used to be moderate by relative standards but then started rocketing 5 years ago going up between 5 and 9% year after year. You need to be very rich or to have a bursary. It’s convenient if one parent works in the city. It makes parents’ evenings and the like much easier. The sixth form is small and the girls at CLSG and the boys at CLS would benefit from having some mixed classes. Disappointingly, CLSG has gone headlong into social justice theory and all things woke. I realise society is changing and popular private schools are under scrutiny and need to be seen doing the whatever is deemed the right thing at all times. But I would prefer more intellectual rigour. I come from a tradition where everything is challenged, understanding an opponent’s argument is desirable, and confidence comes from testing one’s ideas. A school for bright girls where only one opinion can be entertained seems an opportunity lost.

Hi all, I have been a long-time lurker in these kinds of threads. We went through the 11+ process last year. I posted some comments about G&L and CLSG in the SW 11+ thread. They were based on our observations last year and the observations close to us.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/secondary/4134992-Part-2-SW-London-Girls-Indies-11-Pandemic-Panic?pg=32

Please be nice to your DDs. Don't make them feel like a failure (very important!) because they didn't get to a higher ranked school (or because they were told not to apply to one). The parents are likely more stressed than their DDs in this process.

It has been mentioned time and time again that the outstanding pastoral care at G&L, combined with their academic achievement, appeals to many. CLSG is in an urban world, which also appeals to many.

Here are my notes for SHHS and Highgate:

SHHS (South Hampstead) – Another aspirational school. Popular Head Mistress who presents herself as a role model for her students – no buying of new clothes for a year! Well done. One parent we met decided on SHHS only because of the Head Mistress. Actually, my DP got a ‘cold’ vibe from the staff, but not the students. It was fine for me. The students who toured us were the most most most candid of all. One girl said that SHHS girls like hanging out in Hampstead High Street after school – the place to be! We were told that some girls have moved here (or Channing ) from NLCS or CLSG - pastoral issues for undoubtedly smart girls. Small but newish campus. Kids are proud of the small roof top ‘veranda’. New music centre. Junior school is in a different street/building. They use the sports grounds in Lymington Road/Avanley Gardens. I heard that they like making several phone calls to ask undecided parents whether they will accept the offer or not. Just approx 55 places for 11+. For the 11+ consortium test, your DD must have done well to be offered a place - more so if she was awarded an academic scholarship, but without a discount on fees.

Highgate – We only visited the school once. It is a big co-ed school. My DD enjoyed barbecuing marshmallows during their Open Day. There was even a concert by the students – a rock band playing! Despite the fact that we were leaning more into a single sex school for our DD, we still gave Highgate a chance. One thing that put us off here is that whilst we were chatting with a girl here, and she was telling us that Mandarin is challenging, two boys said that she was just not good enough and that she does not try hard enough – the boys laughed and then left. They must be close and just kidding with each other. However, it was not a good show for visiting parents! The Biology labs were great with the set-up a bit different from the usual. There were animals in the labs – cool! And the D&T facilities were superb – hopefully the girls get to use it equally as boys.

Sorry but it's honestly gross to read "I'm feeling flat and ungrateful after my DD got offers from all the top schools she applied to". Oh poor you. Seriously - perhaps think about all the children who bust their guts for months and dealt with unprecedented change and uncertainty and didn't get offers today or who don't have a choice. You've managed to sound both smug and grossly entitled.

I think we all need a good night sleep! Feeling slightly better now, just having acknowledged to myself that it's ok to feel a bit rubbish even though I thought I would be elated.
Deep down NLCS feels right, my DD thinks she is the bee's knees right now (she received offers from Habs and St Albans so 5 in total) so it's just me that is plagued by insecurities. I am just going to stop thinking about it, have ice cream and watch crap on TV. Thank you all for the handholding today, honestly it was so helpful. x

@Justanothergirl19 I cannot believe you describe exactly how I have been feeling all day! Rather flat and ungrateful and hard working any of it out. A massive flatness and come down. I am putting it down to months of anxiety, navigating and juggling all the changes, lack of sleep last couple of wks and anticipation of it all. I have to say I am so glad you have described it as you have. I think you might need a day or to clear your head and then start working through options, all the priorities and practicalities, but def work on instincts and what would 100% be the best fit for DD not on other views, reputation, gloss etc. Where do you see her thrive?

We didn’t apply any of them and had considered Highgate and Channing (I have several family members who went to Highgate) so have an affinity with it, but a bit too far on the road or bus for us. I do imagine one has to be totally on top of their game for NLCS and the pressure will be intense but expect that may be the same for all you have and Channing less so.

Also did you / DD ideally want co-ed over girls only? Lots of questions to narrow it down. Hard when you have such great offers from all...

No, and that’s a really good point. We only got to visit Channing and Hab. We know NLCS a little bit from playing fixtures there but not quite the same.
I can’t put my finger on it, maybe Highgate is doing a better job of making us feel wanted? They are sending a stream of cards and emails to welcome us. Maybe it’s the potential pressure at NLCS. I really can’t explain it.
I just said to my husband:” I feel like when it’s Christmas Day and all the presents have been opened”. It’s that sort of flatness.
Maybe I just need some sleep!
I am sorry, everyone, I do realise I sound like a massive moaner and i should just be grateful.

@Justanothergirl19 so sorry, I overlooked it! That is amazing. I know it is all such a hard decision. For some it becomes crystal clear and for others not esp if unanticipated offers come in. I guess only way is to give it a few days and go over each with a magnifying glass and clear head. Did you visit them all?

We got an offer a couple of hours ago, sorry I thought I had posted above!
You’d think that would be that but somehow we are really confused all of a sudden.

Sorry for typos meant *tough!!! On phone and frenzied typing at moment.

When will you find out NLCS results? Late incoming if today?

It’s a really good point, NLCS is ideally located for us so it should be a no-brainer so why is it so hard to make a decision? I feel bizarrely indebted to all the schools that made an offer.

Congrats to all! Also think about where other students live - my DD goes to school on edge of London 12 miles away from us (we're in central London) and only one girl lives near. This has meant during Covid, its been harder as DD can't go for a socially distanced walk with anyone else as they're too far away. In normal times it's not a deal breaker but it can still make life harder....

Just to say we received an offer from NLCS as well. So happy but now my head is spinning with the decision making. What a strange day.

One last point to consider on CLSG. Do either of you work in the City yourself? That makes life much easier if you need to go to parent’s evenings, drop in for a chat with teachers about something specific, drip something off, help her carry in a huge work project on the Tube one morning, collect her if she’s taken poorly etc.

If you live and work in North London or the West End then CLSG would be less useful.

Just popping on to say well done to all of your DD’s. I know exactly how you are all feeling! For those considering CLSG, they do group the girls from the same geographical areas in the same class and there is a travel buddy system. @BlackRainbow2020 it is worth asking the admissions office about where the offers have been made geographically. In my DD’s year, there were very few from that area (from memory just one from Wimbledon way) which does impact ability to share lifts/ travel to get to parties etc when they get older (fingers crossed there are parties again!)

@NewMum112 Stellar news! Totally incredible. Must be all time high at yours today and touch decision. Which will it be?

Any families whose DD travels from Richmond/Barnes/East Sheen/Mortlake to CLSG?

Thank you @MumsRule20, our favourite is NLCS, which is why the wait is killing us but we are also feeling a bizarre sense of gratitude to each of the schools who offered DD a place which makes us want to say yes to each and every one of them!
I feel the same as I do when I have had a really big argument and cried all day kind of thing, just want to curl up in a ball and sleep.
Is that strange? I can’t believe my DD2 is doing her 11+ in 10 months!
Who else are you waiting for, if anyone?

@Justanothergirl19 wow amazing news well done!!!! So fantastic. We didn’t do Highgate or any of the others you mentioned. That is amazing. Interesting how SHHS came out as a no. Although like you say, no biggie for you with the other offers in the bag.

I haven’t told DD yet. May wait a day or two as she doesn’t know today is D day - offer day 😂

Tell me about it, cannot believe today is the day we have all been waiting for so long and the journey we have endured in this gruelling most stressful Covid year 11+ process.

So what do you think you will choose?

Hello,
We also received a “no” from SHHS but a yes from Channing, Highgate and STAHS. Not complaining at all.
Still waiting for Habs and NLCS.
Hands down hardest day in a long time. My DD seems to be unravelling!
Congrats on City x

That's really interesting you say that @MajesticWhine - I always come on these threads and say go for the easiest journey - it feels like the only known vs all the unknowns. I recently had an acquaintance ask me whether her 4 year old should go for a ten minute walk to SHHS or NLCS. They totally ignored my advice!

Good luck to those waiting. I've done the Friday Before Half Term thing three times and the memory brings me out in hives.