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Original poster

DD doesnt want to go to Prom.

65 replies

Nerdcc · 03/10/2019 21:22

I know it is early...

My DD is in Year 11. She has told me she doesnt want to go to her Prom. What do I do as I want her to go. She will be leaving that school and it hasn't been the easiest for her.

OP posts:
daffodilrosedaisy · 04/10/2019 04:47

I didn’t go to mine - just felt like I knew who m friends were by then so why would I waste time and money dressing up to impress people I didn’t even like. Don’t regret it at all. But my school was v bitchy

GothMummy · 04/10/2019 04:09

Loads of kids don't go at my son's school. It isn't considered cool. Proms did not even exist when I left secondary school, so I fail to see what the big deal is.

Nat6999 · 04/10/2019 03:51

Ds has already worked out how many days he has to be absent so that he isn't allowed to go & marked them on the calendar.

Topseyt · 04/10/2019 03:26

It should be her choice, not yours.

If she doesn't want to go to prom then you can't force her.

Namechangeforthiscancershit · 04/10/2019 03:02

We all managed to leave school without a prom.

It's really early in the year- your daughter may change her mind. If she does or doesn't, well done her for knowing her own mind.

Aquamarine1029 · 04/10/2019 02:04

Please leave her alone and let her make her own decision. My daughter loved school, had loads of friends and was very popular, several boys asked her to be their date, but she had no interest in going to prom. She's 20 now and has absolutely no regrets about it. She just didn't feel the need to go.

sashh · 04/10/2019 02:03

She will be leaving that school and it hasn't been the easiest for her.

So why should she spend as much as one second extra with the people who will remind her of that?

pumkinspicetime · 04/10/2019 01:52

I ended up not going to mine, several decades later can't say I regret it.
It is her choice.

AutumnRose1 · 04/10/2019 01:40

Why do you want her to go? It's her choice.

Mummaofmytribe · 04/10/2019 01:38

My DD didn't want to go to hers. Thought it a waste of time and money. She and a small group of mates had a brilliant night out instead at a venue that suited them in clothes they liked.

DeRigueurMortis · 04/10/2019 01:36

Why are you so invested in living vicariously through your DD?

Seriously....

If she doesn't want to go that's her decision.

My DS didn't want to go, until a week before when he changed his mind.

Admittedly a bit of a PITA rush on his outfit but hardly a major issue.

It's her Prom, not yours and perhaps maybe consider the pressure from you to go is as big a reason for not attending as any and the fact that it's even an issue under discussion at this point in the school year.....

wheresmymojo · 04/10/2019 01:26

I didn't go to the Prom and haven't regretted it for a second!

Insomniacscientist · 04/10/2019 00:51

Please don’t force her to go just to fulfill your own needs/preconceived ideas about what should be done.
Especially if there has been any bullying involved it may feel like yet another situation when she feels on the outer and excluded.

cheeseandpickle247 · 04/10/2019 00:40

I didn’t go to my prom out of choice. I hated school so I went to Leeds fest instead. Had an amazing time and don’t regret it a single bit. Everyone I’d spoken to since said it was boring anyway.

Rainbowknickers · 04/10/2019 00:28

God my sd’s prom cost us nearly £700
(And that was me doing her hair and make up or it would have come in closer to a grand)
She went-spent the whole night in tears and it’s gone down in the rainbow household history as the night we’re not allowed to speak about
Complete waste of time effort and money

Roozy123 · 04/10/2019 00:13

It's up to her it's her prom.

I didn't want to go to mine.. so I didn't..
If my mum had wanted me to go.. I still wouldn't have gone.

starfishmummy · 04/10/2019 00:10

What do I do as I want her to go.

Surely the important thing is that she doesnt want to go!!

Cazza17 · 04/10/2019 00:04

don't try and live your life through her. She doesn't want to go. mine was 30 seconds walk from my house and I still wasn't interested. its a personal preference

hotdogwoof · 03/10/2019 23:46

I didn't go to mine. I went out for dinner with my family instead.

BackforGood · 03/10/2019 23:43

I do't get it.
Why would you want her to go ? Confused

My dd1 didn't go. Wasn't her 'thing'.
Fine by me. In fact, nothing to do with me.

She chose not to go and she didn't go. the end.

HeddaGarbled · 03/10/2019 23:35

Why do you want her to go? I don’t know why things have been difficult for her but if she is socially isolated, it could be excruciatingly awful for her.

italianfiat · 03/10/2019 23:29

What do I do

You say 'ok dear, don't worry about it'

as I want her to go.

Well it's not up to you. Why do you want her to go? What difference does it make to you?

BubblesBuddy · 03/10/2019 23:27

Rather tawdry American import. I wouldn’t force her to go. Have a family weekend somewhere instead.

BackOnceAgainWithABurnerEmail · 03/10/2019 22:08

I’d just be nonchalant at this point. She doesn’t need to decide for ages. She just needs to know that past a certain point she won’t be able to change her mind (for ticket and dress finding reasons).

rainbowlou · 03/10/2019 22:06

I don’t understand why you wanting her to go is so important? Mine didn’t want to go so she didn’t and it was nothing to do with me!