My son hated his first transition day at secondary

In her case made worse by not putting them in their tutor groups but in alphabetical groupings so she felt the one girl she did talk to wouldn't be in her form.

Why oh why do they do this? Better to out them in their classes for September and let them get to know other people.

Same experience here. DD has had 6 transition days and still doesn’t want to go. She isn’t crying just says everything is boring. They got a free book today after their reading test and they’ve been asked to fill a reading book in. She hates the book and doesn’t want to go there in September. I’m not worrying till she’s done half a term, she’s also the only one from her primary going and when I asked if she liked any of the girls she said no. We’ll see I guess- don’t stress till you have to.

OP, no help here but DD has been through v similar experience today. She went off all excited and came back crushed. A lot of tears. In her case made worse by not putting them in their tutor groups but in alphabetical groupings so she felt the one girl she did talk to wouldn't be in her form.

The secondary school my sons attend has an additional morning before the transition day for children coming from schools that aren't feeder schools. So Ds1 had only 1 other child from his primary and Ds2 had none.

That way the children have familiar faces before the transition day and they do group activities whilst the parents are in the hall having a talk about what the school does to facilitate friendships.

I would agree with PP and talk to the school. It must be terrifying for him and school can and should help.

Call them. Teachers may not notice a different uniform - we had transition today and the class I had contained 6 different primaries of which four wore red jumpers! Unless I got close and looked at the badge I wouldn't know

Definitely call them but don't worry too much. DD loved her induction day then had an awful time when she started. DS didn't enjoy induction but has loved his first year (after hating primary). It's a bit overwhelming and the people who know each other stick together at first so it feels very cliquey. Once they start properly it will change.

Definitely call. It's not enough for people to say he will be fine. Not everyone is and there's a lot schools can do to help smooth the transition. Did he get to find out who his classmates are? Is there a way of making contact with them and meeting up over the summer?

Please ring the school and raise your concerns. I say this as a parent if a child who really struggled to settle in secondary school. They might not be able to do anything, but hopefully they can. Worse case scenario and he doesn't settle you will know you've done as much as you can as a parent. I hope the rest transition is better for your son and he makes some new friends

I wouldn't call the school. No need. He'll be fine when he gets there.

DS didn't have a transition day and was white as a sheet on day one but came home happy as Larry and has been fine ever since.

Call them!

Call them, although you think they should know they have so much going on they wont necessarily put two and two together.

Definitely call them it's the schools job to help the transition period go smoothly- it's always best to nip issues in the bud - good luck to your son, it's not an easy time

Why not speak to the high school? It may be they offer a couple of extra transition days during holidays for pupils who are finding it quite daunting? It will give him chance to meet others who are equally nervous.

This happened to me. I went from a state primary to a private secondary. I hated the transition, I remember ringing my mum on the bus home saying I'm never going etc.
My mum rang the school and explained I felt isolated and she didn't want me worrying all summer.
The next day I was put into a lovely little group of friends. And I absolutely loved it. Albeit from the dramas of general school. I'm now 23 and 2 of my initial friends were my bridesmaids at my wedding more than 10 years on.. x

I'm s secondary teacher and we ran transition this week. Some of them have been tearful but I've been so impressed they got on with it. Not sure what school will do if you ring them though. Is there a parents FB group for new starters?

Can you phone the new school and explain what’s happened? It’s important he doesn’t worry about it all summer.