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Original poster

Dd devastated- behaviour point

60 replies

Hsaansnsn6776 · 07/05/2019 20:47

I know people will say that she is being unreasonable and babyish but dd15 was on the school site and saw that she had a behaviour point. She’s an extremely hard working student and always does her best, never steps out of line and she’s just a bit upset because she already feels that she doesn’t get noticed and now feels like it seems unfair to have a behaviour point. She thinks it may be because of 1 forgotten piece of homework but I think that is unfair because, she has never forgotten homework for that teacher before and is always hard working in that lesson. Please don’t attack me if you have nothing nice to say but I was just wondering what people thought about it Sad

OP posts:
nancy75 · 07/05/2019 20:57

I can kind of see her point.
Although the 1 point doesn’t matter there are lots of kids (my Dd is one of them) that always behave, always try hard, always do their homework & always get overlooked when it comes to the positive behaviour points.
It feels a bit unfair that the one time they do something slightly wrong is noticed but the several years of them doing everything right is ignored.

CherryPavlova · 07/05/2019 20:55

Yes, getting something wrong, getting a demerit, failing at something is very good for young people.
You need to support her in building resilience by minimising it and letting her cope with it.

Original poster
Hsaansnsn6776 · 07/05/2019 20:53

No, and she knows that tomorrow she will move on but to her it is a big deal. She is never rewarded for the good but is punished for the bad. The school are not the same as others schools regarding behaviour points and there are very few in high hundreds.

OP posts:
MintyCedric · 07/05/2019 20:53

I think you need to work on her resilience if she is really bothered by this.

This.

Also, the fact she's never forgotten homework before is irrelevant...if she's 15 and doing her GCSE's homework is important and she should be able to organise and remember stuff like is.

QueenofCBA · 07/05/2019 20:52

If she forgot her homework she deserves the usual sanction. It doesn’t matter that she has never forgotten homework before, the rules apply to all.
As others have said, teach her to take it on the chin, the world will not end.

Hellohah · 07/05/2019 20:52

She should meet my son, and be happy she's only got 1 behaviour point!
Surely they tell her what the behaviour point is for. I know (as you can gather from my opening line), I have a lot of experience. At his school, parents get an email for everything, positive or negative points and that results in a detention at the end of the day where the teacher has a brief conversation with the student about the reasons for the negative etc... So everyone knows

delilabell · 07/05/2019 20:50

I'd get her to ask her form tutor to check it.
If it is for something she didn't do (forgotten homework or even a staff error) they can ask for it to be removed.

Mokepon · 07/05/2019 20:50

Will it matter in 1 month? A year? 5 years?
A good opportunity for her to learn perspective and actually life can be very unfair. Not nice, but sometimes that's how it is.
And sometimes things are worth fighting and others just need to be shrugged off.

Dermymc · 07/05/2019 20:48

She forgot her homework therfore the sanction applies. It's one point over a whole year. There will be students in the high hundreds. I think you need to work on her resilience if she is really bothered by this.

Villanellesproudmum · 07/05/2019 20:48

My dd got to year 10 before she received a behaviour point for forgetting a book, no big deal.