Opinion please! School absence due to parent working abroad

We could all agree that your circumstances are so unusual and special that you shouldn’t be fined and it won’t make any difference since LEA’s don’t consult MN before they issue them.
Why do you feel the need for us to agree with you OP? Go, don’t go, have a nice time but be prepared for a fine when you get back

I'd just take the kids with you and pay the fines! It sounds as though it'd be a great travel opportunity for you all.

Absolutely not exceptional circumstances.....simply put you are working abroad and want your family at your side most likely to prop up your mental health.
Your kids, your choice but you seem to take offence when the vast majority don’t agree with you yet you post on a public forum?
Have a great trip anyway.

Slightly OT but you don't “do” Ebacc so you?

I thought it was a made up name for a specified set of gcses, isn't it largely an irrelevance

She didn't authorize or pass it on for a fine, it just went down as unauthorized absences. It was only a few days though

Your comment that it was only a few days is probably the critical point. Most LAs have an absence threshold below which a parent won't be fined. So a few days may not result in a fine but two weeks is far more likely to lead to a fine.

I would also add that you don't want to be sharing a hotel room with jet lagged dc if you are trying to work. Make sure you have your own space to sleep when you get where you are going. Also allow jet lag recovery for them before sending them back into school.

You may not get fined OP, we took our dc out of school to get visas for moving abroad, it wasn't authorized by the HT but we completed the paperwork for the absence before we left and met with her. She didn't authorize or pass it on for a fine, it just went down as unauthorized absences. It was only a few days though.
Enjoy your trip.
It isn't an exceptional circumstance to be fair to the school, my dc would have no education if we always traveled with DH. We sometimes join him for a long weekend however, current school in US is totally relaxed about this.

School want here to do eBAC, she's chosen options of Food Tech, Art, Geography and Health And Social Care

That’s odd. Because the Ebacc consists øƒ

English language and literature
maths
the sciences
geography or history
a language

According to the government that is. But of course they may well be wrong and not appreciate the specialness and exceptionality of your child. I’m sure you will put them right OP.

Two weeks out of school in Y8 won't make too much difference to your child's education.... but a top set (so I'm presuming able) child taking H&SC and food tech?
That will have far more of an impact in her opportunities and choices in life. Art is fine, as everyone needs a subject they love rather than purely academic studies, but really?

Also, you need to work on your people skills. No wonder your husband works away so much. - You sound like bitch.

Its not exceptional circumstances. Other people manage to have one parent working abroad just fine. You just want a holiday. Own it and pay the fine.

Is it £120 for the whole trip, or £120/day

It depends on the LA but the law allows for fines of up to £60 per child per parent per session (there are two sessions per day). So, for two parents and two children, you could be fined £240 per day. However, it is unlikely to be that much. I don't know of any LA that would do that. Your LA has a code of practice which will set out under what circumstances fines are issued and the level of fines.

The problem is that 'exceptional' is set by the head/person authorising the absence

Personally I would describe that as a positive. I would rather someone local in full possession of the facts was taking the decision rather than a remote bureaucrat following a rigid set of rules.

Perhaps if you appeal it the local authority would get involved and have a say

They won't. They do not have any say in whether or not absence should be authorised. Even if it is a community school, the LA will only get involved after you have exhausted the school's complaints procedure and then only to check that the procedure has been followed properly. The LA will not overrule the governors.

The HT is basically saying to you that she would personally call it exceptional, but from the rules they have she cannot use that and has to have it as unauthorised

No she isn't. There are no rules other than those the school makes itself. There is some guidance from the National Association of Head Teachers but that is not binding on schools.

It's the weakest of all arguments. It's the equivalent of "if pigs could fly" but people think it has weight for some reason

In the context of this particular issue, it does have weight. The fines were introduced because of growing problems with absenteeism in schools, particularly persistent absenteeism. The rules were tightened a few years ago because far too many parents thought they had the right to take their children out of school for two weeks for a holiday. That was not what the rules said but so many parents believed it was true that schools were finding it difficult to prevent it, with the result that learning was repeatedly being disrupted for the entire class as yet another child disappeared for two weeks in the sun.

The problem is that 'exceptional' is set by the head/person authorising the absence. Perhaps if you appeal it the local authority would get involved and have a say.

The HT is basically saying to you that she would personally call it exceptional, but from the rules they have she cannot use that and has to have it as unauthorised.

I went out of school for a week for our family holiday every year (they didn't fine back then). I was one of the smarter children and I never felt any effects from it and if did not affect my career.

On the flip side, I know of one family who would take their child out of school at least one period (whether a day or a week) a month as they worked away and the children fell very far behind as the parents did nothing to make up all the time missed and fill in the blanks.

I am of the view that there is more to life and education is important and doesn't always take place in the classroom. You will have to suffer the fine if one gets issued (they may try not to) but have a wonderful time.

Just go, pay the fine its a max of £240 covering both kids.

family once in a lifetime trip to a different continent as educational.

I would suggest that a lot depends on what the wife and children are going to do all day. Living as local people do in a village cut off from civilisation would be very different to two weeks in the sort of hotel which would be pretty much exactly the same as at home.

What plans have been made for the children. Do they each have a project, journal or other activity to keep them occupied and engaged ?

As for travelling as a family in order to maintain the parent's mental health, I just can't imagine who would do something like that.

Making your mental health problems your children's responsibility is a horrific and damaging thing to do.

It sounds like the OP is looking only at the benefit to him of the DC going and not whether it is actually in their best interests.

Not that he is going to return to this thread though.

OP says he is recovering, but he may be holding a fear he might have suicidal thoughts during his long flight and/or stay in AUS if alone? What if he had a nervous meltdown there? He believes only his family can keep him sane and alive, maybe?

OP's mental health is not his family's responsibility. They cannot be expected to live their lives according to his demands forever.

(ps For a top set child, your DC's chosen options seem to cut out a lot of A level routes).

That's what I thought too.

Chewy - thats a horrific position for the children to be in... and is in no way their responsibility. If he is so unwell that he fears he could have suicidal thoughts whilst in Australia (although to be fair to the OP he's not claimed anything as extreme as that) then the solution would be to decline the trip, explain MH to work... not to say yes to Australia but on condition I can take my family and then moan on MN about likelihood of fines...

Chewy, the responsibility for their dad feeling suicidal or not is NOT the children's. At all.

it would be a catastrophic and traumatic tragedy for his children if they had to lose their dad like this because of the 'rule', wouldn't it?

What would be catastrophic, not to mention a massive safeguarding red flag, would be for children to be made to believe they are responsible for ensuring their parent doesn’t take their own life.

But chewy the pressure that puts on children in immense and unsustainable- at the moment it appears he cannot be without them that is incredibly unhealthy and potentially just as catastrophic and traumatic

OP says he is recovering, but he may be holding a fear he might have suicidal thoughts during his long flight and/or stay in AUS if alone? What if he had a nervous meltdown there? He believes only his family can keep him sane and alive, maybe?

It's not a great idea to take a 'holiday' during term time, but it would be a catastrophic and traumatic tragedy for his children if they had to lose their dad like this because of the 'rule', wouldn't it?

This is my only imagination and hope OP isn't in that serious situation.

Go for it OP. Pay fines if you must.

Independent, yet can't go without family - that doesn't really match up either. Not your children's job to support you, OP.

It's not exceptional circumstances. But in the world of TheGreenEye it is and that's all that matters.

As a father surely your duty is to do all you can to stabilise your own MH so it has minimal impact on your children.

I think you have to be the kind of person who doesn’t centre yourself in everything for that to happen.