Starting secondary support thread 2

Sorry to hear your are having problems with primary school Dobbins, saw other thread too - think they need to move him somewhere quiet not another classroom - mine used to get the library, sensory room was tried but that used to lead him to do things to get with the soft things. You must be superwoman to deal with this x4.

DD returned to school yesterday, still unwell, but managed school and youth club and to be rude to me but DS had another bad day. I have started feeling really ill and school are insisting on a meeting and saying only the mother can attend as psychologist said having mother at meeting is "imperative". Wonder if its ever imperative to have the Dad there or does being male make them completely unknowledgeable. They are still trying to get it at our house. Atm I've got fever, migraine, feel sick and am ignoring it - they've been offered a meeting with DH, I am not meeting them really ill. DS is also getting very upset at the idea he has to be at meeting so its causing stress all round.

Sorry to hear that Cheminotte Hopefully will be better after a rest.

Teacher training day here so extra day off which is great as DS needs a break and DD is still sleeping most of the day though makes a change from struggling to get her to sleep at all.

Hope everyone had a good weekend. Just a quiet one here, DS fed the lemurs at our village zoo but otherwise just resting.

I'm wondering if its not disability discrimination as its delaying children getting diagnosis, trying to change them through parenting courses implying autism is a fault etc. May try complaint as think its disadvantaging ASD kids.

Thanks Dobbins Private one would be worth considering though we are a bit tight with money atm as got 2 houses until sell old one and and have to renovate and clear old house first which is proving difficult from here with numerous DC dramas. Once we've sold we will be fine again but no idea how long that will be. But that could be the best solution.

Got message from Head saying will get senco to do referral and at same time got message from senco saying get doctors to do it. So I phoned ASD assessment place - they said they reject a lot of doctor referrals so best if school do it. They said there are masses of forms and they won't see us initially until we have a Family support worker, Ed Psych, EHA and parenting classes. Great so they assume all kids with suspected ASD have terrible parents or maybe you can parent the ASD out plus we don't have time for this. Hopefully she was just very unhelpful and its not that bad but sounded like we are taking years not months for help from them and they are trying to make it as difficult as possible to get diagnosis.

From what DD said the teacher at our school went in pulled back the duvet and gets child out of bed then takes them to school. Not sure had much effect as ended up pregnant at 16. It's good they care so much but they are quite ott at times.

DS now home and seems happy, says he feels poorly and a bit tired so might be why he was unsettled at school. Head was lovely asking what more they could do to help him and said she'ld seen him in class the other day and he's amazing. The school will do referral.

Senco e-mailed through who does assessment in our area and I phoned them and apparently GP or school can refer and woman thought both pretty useless . Though school makes more sense to refer in a lot of ways as its them with the issue but yes we wondered about home ed kids too. Plus some people have issues at home not at school.

Interesting other schools take out of bed too, surprised they are doing that as would have thought could leave them open to abuse allegations. Head has just called and we have to collect DS.

DD home again, hope not going to be this bad every month. DS gone off happily enough. DH told me doctors phoned and cancelled ASD referral saying needs to be via school, argh.

Gp thinks migraines and ruled out meningitis but just gave painkillers despite saying its linked to periods and she will have thid every period. They said they will consider hormone meds later after she's been ill more.

No idea when they were coming round. This school seem to invite themselves round to houses all the time, first day DS refused school said they could come round and get him, good luck with that. DDs friend said they used to come and get her sister out of bed each morning. 😱 Not sure if its a rural thing but very surprised they do this especially taking children out of beds. Her friends family are very poor and probably don't realise school shouldn't have been doing this, was well intentioned but they are very ott at times.

Thanks Witchend Called 111 and they were borderline on emergency doctors within hour or go to hospital so spoke to doctors at our surgery almost instantly and appointment at 5.20pm. They think migraine is most likely as same as in December but want to rule out meningitis as she has lots of symptoms - no rash and chin can touch chest. Probably off tomorrow as very bad still today and Monday is a teacher training day so should give good rest.

Sorry to hear yours are ill / anxious. Horrified reaction at school coming round from both kids - DD said that should be illegal and DS agreed. Told DS school had said he's missing a lot more lessons and want him to go to meeting to discuss his successes and failures. He said what failures, ridiculous and DD added who wants to discuss their failures. Did point out to school only successes and suggested improvements. He said nothing was wrong he just put a super effort in first two weeks and its unrealistic to expect that all the time.

Welcome Fork Sorry to hear your DS is alone so much.

My DD went to a school she knew no-one last year and struggled to start with to make friends, she joined lots of clubs and lots of friends by end of year so clubs do help. She's quite outgoing though which helps. This year we moved areas, DD hated last school and wanted to be closer to DHs work, so both kids knew no-one. DD made friends instantly and meets them after school a lot, DS has only just got his first one. I think friends will come but its hard until they do - is there anyone he would like to meetup with after school and maybe go to cinema or whatever they feel like, that might help.

SENCO has just messaged to say DS was better at start of term and now missing quite a few lessons, asked if we could all meet up maybe at our house and go through his successes and failures with him. He's going to love that suggestion. DD still really ill but refusing to see a doctor, may call 111 to check soon as such a violent headache, vomiting, fever, can't tolerate light, pain down one side, very dizzy, very drowsy, refused to eat for last few days apart from 1/2 a jacket twice though half school seem to be off so hopefully just a virus but no signs of improvement and its day 5.

Sorry to hear about DS2 being tripped over on purpose, shame he doesn't know which delightful child that was.

DD is still very unwell and dizzy now with a hacking cough and temperature so will be off again today. Got her report through yesterday which seems to be improving. Turns out RE GCSE is now compulsory and they take it a year early, not too happy about that but doesn't look optional. Still RE is one of DS's best subjects - he got obsessed with it at primary and decided he was having a Muslim wife and was becoming half Muslim-half Christian.