DD can't sleep in boarding

Op it's trial and error to find ear plugs that work best. I like foam ones but even then I need to try several as I have small ear canals. Boots do a good range. I go for the dark blue long foam ones that are easily moulded. And then I wear ear muffs on top to keep them in and double sound insulated. Try test before you buy Bose silence headphones. They are not plugged into a device . They work on their own.

The ear plugs (yellow and pink ones) are excellent. Dh snores and they are the best I've tried britishsnoring.co.uk/shop.php?PHPSESSID=k4nrbkrde86ceq90gq8sgkmte6

So if it is a trigger you may need to address it differently possibly with something like CBT or similar especially if to DD has been badly affected by something in her dorm, and is being triggered each and every night. This is unlikely to get better without help and could get worse.

A creepy experience can be just as serious as anything else, esp if she is waking up alone in the middle of the night and can't sleep because she is scared. That can be quite a terrifying experience in itself if she feels threatened in some way.

I would explore CBT or move her to another dorm (if possible) for a few nights and see if it makes any difference.

It has clearly made a real impact on her if she is also suffering at home, effectively bringing it home with her.

I can see why you are worried, this will affect both her education and mental health, she has had a full term already so any issues should have settled down.

I am not sure I would be satisfied with the house mistress' response at all.

Is your dd homesick? Getting on okay with the other girls? Generally doing okay, or is it just all quite hard at the moment?

The flight or fight mode is probably stopping her from sleep. This pattern of behaviour usually present when an adult or child is distressed and alert. It is not something she can over ride, as it is her body's response to her surroundings, telling her may not feel 'safe'. I have had this too, and it is quite difficult to overcome. You need to know for sure that she is with kind and gentle girls, and is relaxed, and perhaps getting to the root of the problem in her dorm and why she isn't relaxed before sleeping is going to be the only way forward.

The school need to take it much more seriously.

The 'right' school is only right if she is doing well and coping, it isn't right if these things aren't happening. I would want a resolution by christmas at the very latest, make this clear to the school.

Can you flexi board? So she can catch up at the weekends?

OTT is jumping straight from a child who isn't sleeping well in a new environment to declaring that she is mentally ill and shouldn't be at a boarding school.

I had terrible sleep habits as a teen at boarding school, staying up chatting with friends, sleeping in the library during the day. I had a great time and was not mentally ill.

Maybe if she is an early riser, she just needs to go to bed earlier, with ear plugs, so she isn't disturbed by the noise, but has had enough sleep by 5am, if that is when she wakes naturally.

Is it a mainstream or specialist school?

In my experience it is unusual for boarding house staff to do rounds in the middle of the night, I also doubt they'd be staffed to do any 'sleep intervention' late at night/ very early.

Could she swap to an individual room?

If it's a specialist school, I'd just talk to them and see what they generally do for poor sleepers.

Is she happy at school? Kx

I'm a bad sleeper. When it flares up badly I have needed treatment for anxiety and depression. It helped almost immediately.

Silicone ear plugs are my friend.

It took my daughter half a term or so to get used to sharing her room at school, now she sleeps through anything. That said do try to see if there's any other problems, disturbed sleep can be indicative or other issues from mental health issues to hormones.

I sleep all night with ear plugs, they dull the sound of husband snoring! I also use a Vic nasal spray, don't know whether or not I need it but sometimes my nose has been a bit 'stuffy' and it helps. Get several pairs of ear plugs because they are easily lost and get dirty (I put mine in those little 'netty' bags in the washing machine).

An eye mask is a good idea but get one that's comfortable, I had one that irritated me terribly and wasn't worth the effort.

Just having a few props may settle your daughter but she is still adjusting, it's not always easy.

If she's not sleeping at home either, then it's not to do with noises and earplugs aren't going to help.

I don't think it is unusual for some children to have trouble settling into boarding school and some will take longer than others to find their equilibrium.

OP obviously has her reasons for sending the child away for school in the first place so I doubt it's as straight forward as bringing her home.

I'd expect a boarding school to have experience of dealing with this though and that you'd be getting better advice from them, who know your child, than you will from a bunch of strangers on-line. It's very concerning if they are unable to help IMO.

Should say dd, blooming auto correct!

I expect the boarding school is nowhere near home so she couldn’t board during the day and come home at night.
However, this just sounds awful for your dad. Have you asked her if she’s worried about anything? If she enjoys school. If she said she hated it would you change? I say this knowing several people who have boarded and had long term effects from it, you must listen to your child for both of your long term good relations.

Don't go OTT?

WTF?

How is suggesting bringing a mentally ill child home going OTT?

Boarding school can be great! Your daughter is clearly not doing well overnight at boarding school, so bring her home. Send her in the day.

It's really NOT an OTT suggestion, I promise.

How old is she OP? My initial thoughts are that it could be anxiety related or shes just a very light sleeper. If its only started since shes been boarding i'd say more likely to be anxiety/homesickness (even if shes saying its not). I'm a light sleeper and love my ear plugs and eye mask. However i'm not sure if they'd be suitable for a child. Plus if she didnt need them at home I think you have to look at the other issues

How old is she?
My dd for years was a disaster at sleepovers etc, as she just doesn't go to sleep when others are around. She is a bit hyper with a house full of people, and can't switch it off. I could imagine for her that boarding school would be like that.
That would also mean though that she was getting exhausted from not being bale to switch it off.

If that sounds like your dd, then I would work on her understanding herself a bit, and that she needs to wind down at bedtime. Reading, doing an adult colouring book, playing music quietly, building a deliberate calm down into her routine. Helping her to understand she needs to learn to switch off properly.
Could there be other things, eg someone has an alarm clock that ticks loudly?

It is concerning that the school is not taking it seriously, and I would follow up on that. A young teen sleeping 3 hours a night is not normal.

Muffles earplugs from boots are fab. Why is she at boarding school does she have asd?

I had to use earplugs this summer on holiday and thought i'd never get on with them as I have really narrow ear canals (earbuds are murder)

but I used the really squishy foam ones - you sort of roll them into a point, put them in and they expand.

so comfy - slept like a baby!

insomnia is a normal response to being separated from your family and sent away

this