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Secondary education

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Son started at a Prep in Year 7 and has no friends

27 replies

haverhill · 25/09/2018 10:25

Hi,
I've been beating myself up horribly about sending my son to a prep school after a state primary (in which he was very happy and had friends). So he's joined the Prep in Year 7 and of course, nearly all the children have known each other for several years (many since Reception) and are in established groups. DS is lovely, intelligent, kind boy but not sporty at all (he has minor problems with his feet and legs) and is finding it very hard to make friends. He's resorted to spending all his free time alone in the Library, which breaks my heart.

The massive complication (for me anyway!) is that I teach at the school (that's why he's here; I get a big discount) and so I am seeing him going through this difficult and lonely time first hand.

Has anyone been through something similar? A big part of me is thinking we should withdraw him and send him to the local comp (Ofsted: Good) where most of his friends went before they all form firm new friendships groups. Am I just panicking? It's only been four weeks but I'm not sure how long my nerves can take the battering! I had a very lonely Year 6 at school and can remember the pain of being left out very vividly.
Thanks for reading and any advice.

OP posts:
makingtime · 25/09/2018 11:10

What's the plan for him after Y8? Will he stay in the private system and go to an independent senior? I guess what you're doing next will inform whether he stays or you take him out to go to the comp with his friends.

Theworldisfullofgs · 25/09/2018 10:54

I'm not sure what to say. My son had a bumby start into year 7 after going to the same school as his sister but not his friends. He was in a school where lots of people come from different schools but often in groups.
He really wasn't well in yr7 and that complicated things (an existing condition flared up).
He's is year 8 now and flourishing and the friendship groups have evened out.
I think only you know your son and know what's right for him
As you teach in the school have you seen this with other children in the past? How did they do, give time?