Are the girls in girls' schools very bitchy?

Oh just thought, I'm silly
Told about my experiences - DD has just started at single sex secondary, and I know lots of girls who go there / have gone there.
They are all happy and loved it and they are a range of sorts of people - some outgoing some less so, some quite feminine in appearance some less so.
DD is pretty gender nonconforming, she is having a good time so far.

I'm sure it depends on the area / school and to an extent the cohort in the year more than anything else.
eg DD1 and DD2 year groups at primary school were v different in flavour with DD2 being much more stereotypical >> lots of pink glitter consumerism, some quite mean girls and cliques, while DD1 her year there was none of that.

On the whole I feel single sex education is positive for girls, if the school is good obv.

They remain something separate.

Have you ever been that lone girl in a class? The boys were fine but I wasn't one of them. In the class where there was one other girl, it was somehow obvious we'd sit together.

will other girls take the piss because DD has blue or black bag?

I really doubt it. And if anyone does... well, that's probably a good way to work out who to not much want in your friendship group.

My feeling is that the kids who have the hardest time at school - whether single sex or coed - are the ones who are desperate to be in with the 'popular' group.

'You do you' may be a handy phrase.

The girls in mine were but my school had the reputation of being the bitchiest in the city. Still better than being sexually assaulted or shamed over periods etc.

I am not saying they do not meet boys. Of course they meet boys. But not in an equal learning or social platform. They may not see them as just classmates like the other girls. There are always plenty of older brothers/boys from sports clubs and in all my friends cases, they are coveted. It’s not the same as being in a class with boys and seeing them mature and grow through the years and having proper childhood friendships with them. They remain something separate.

Oh and also DD won’t have to put up with sexual innuendo from the boys like she did in her mixed primary school 🙁
She has a brother and I try and make sure she does mixed activities outside of school, we also regularly socialise with other families with boys (so hopefully she won’t grow up being some weird seat-shifting flirting woman who can’t talk to men....)

My DD is at a single sex school. I find the idea that they’ll all be into pink and make-up and boy bands ridiculous!
My DD isn’t into any of that stuff. She likes maths and science and computing and DT. She won’t have the issue of being in a minority in those subjects (like I remember from my secondary school physics class )
They have school rucksacks but even if she could take her own there’s no way it would be pink.
As for bitchiness - not particularly, there’s a fair amount of drama though, but I think you’d get that in any school with a load of teenagers!

I went to a girls' grammar school and absolutely loved it. My closest friends now are those I made there, even though I left 10 years ago. I agree with pp - there is probably less bitchiness over what is stereotypical girl drama as there isn't as much competition over boys, you don't feel the need to go to school with makeup and hair done every day, etc. Generally people were supportive of each other rather than horrible. Of course you do get some get bitches and bitchiness, but that's just life! I wouldn't have changed my experience at all. And we had two all boys schools just up the road, so there were no issues about not making male "friends" either!

My did is so happy and confident in her all girls secondary I was a mouse at the same age. Boys way meaner than girls in my mixed sex comp

Taught in both. Loved the environment and ethos in the girls' school I taught in. No more bitchy (actually, far less so) than the mixed sex schools I've taught in. I would definitely send my dd to a single sex school if I could.

I’m very surprised that any non selective comprehensive school is in the top 1% in the country. That doesn’t mean that there are not good non selective schools but in the top 1%?

Windbeneath - I know what you mean. I still regularly meet with ex school friends and we all think we suffer from "All girls school syndrome".

OP - you are making the right decision, you can sort the single sex stuff out but you shouldn't pass up on such a good school.

My dd tells me that while there are lots of physical. fights at her mixed comp, they are all between boys, while her friend at all girls comp says there are frequent physical fights between girls there. I find that an interesting difference.

The bitching and bullying at my mixed sex secondary school and DD's mixed sex primary school seem far more intense than any bitching at DD's all girls secondary.

I went to a girls school - it was at times bitchy but also freeing in a lot of ways (no problem with saying you had your period / asking for tampons in class or whatever, no reason to believe you couldn’t do STEM subjects because everyone else taking them were also girls). Overall I enjoyed it and wouldn’t change it! Ditto. I did get pissed off at never having the chance to do rugby or football though.

It will just depend on the cohort. I wouldn’t discount it purely because it’s all girls.

I went to an all girls high school and sixth form college and I loved it. A supportive and freeing environment. I wish I could go back to school sometimes!

well I don't know, I think you should tell your friend to butt out.
At least at girls schools, you wont get the situation of one girl in the year doing engineering and then having to listen to jokes about anal sex for two years while the male teacher 'doesn't hear'?

The local super selective all girls has a very high percentage of self harm in it’s pupils.
I suspect the emphasis there is super selective and the assoc pressure rather than a lack of boys tbf

I went to an all girls school and it has effected my relationship with other women all my life. I was luck that I had scouts to make friends outside school and my best friends were male.
I have other female friends who say the same about girls schools.
The local super selective all girls has a very high percentage of self harm in it’s pupils.

• gender stereotypes are not necessarily down to the school. As long as the school isn’t presenting one option for girls over another for boys.*

The statistics indicate that the type of school is likely to matter. The coeds don't (usually, nowadays) present options as being for girls or boys, yet that is still how some are perceived. The personal choices each girl makes are influenced by the environment and whether there's peer pressure or not.

In an all girls school, the comp sci class, the robotics club etc are obviously meant for the pupils... who happen to be girls. And they don't find themselves pushed to the back of the room, talked over etc which unfortunately does tend to happen in mixed groups.

Can I say that girls in single sex schools really do get to know boys!!! They meet the brothers of their class mates. They go to outside activities and sports groups where there might be boys. They might know boys who are the DS of Family friends. Of course they meet boys! I’ve never read so much rubbish about only knowing girls when you are only with them 7 hours a day and 38 weeks of the year. What about the rest of the time?

In girls schools you won’t be one of two doing technology. There will be plenty of girls doing it. It’s normal. You don’t have to be unfazed because you are a lonely voice amongst boys. This is the advantage of girls schools.

Having cricket is neither here nor there. Girls don’t have to play traditional boys sports to make a point. Why not do women’s sport? What’s wrong with that? No comparisons with boys in a netball team. You can be yourself! I would think they would do athletics too for sports day? What about swimming? I never understand why women have to play the same sports as men and be continually compared, unfavourably, by many. Leave the men to it!

Some girls will be unpleasant wherever they are educated. The school doesn’t change them for the worse. Boys don’t change the way girls are either. Actually girls inspire boys to do better.

Both my DDs went to girls schools and they seem to have friends of both sexes. I do think, op, you went in looking for those pink rucksacks. I really do think that won’t be an issue if she goes there. Shame they don’t have a school rucksack - then a pink rucksack would never darken the doors of the school again. You have to allow everyone to develop their own preferences and not think pink is wrong. It isn’t. Be a bit more tolerant.

I went to an all girls school.

Some of the girls could be unpleasant, always the same ones. More down to the specific individuals than their sex.

I don’t think this would be any different in a co-ed School. I can imagine some girls might behave badly to get attention from boys so I don’t imagine either way is ideal.

I’d also consider the family set up. My DCs go to a co-ed school. I didn’t want them to go to a single sex school simply because that’s not the real world. I didn’t have an awful time but i’d Have been happy knowing how to interact with boys (only females in my family growing up), and stand up for myself. I have boys and girls so they’re used to each other’s company and that of friends who are around regardless.

I’m still more comfortable in the company of women, and I certainly don’t get competitive around men. At pushing 50 I can still take them or leave them. 🤣