Have we got a starting Secondary School Support thread?

Thanks Well DD won't go to sleep but is currently knitting (and slept before) 😱

Just one letter home here so far. Think they leave it up to the pupils whether to take the letters home about clubs etc so DS2 hasn't brought anything like that back. Had a couple of emails.

Am having difficulties posting so I hope this works...
Penguins

We have had precisely one letter, which came home today and was to 'remind' us that it's a fecking Inset day on Monday!! First I'd heard of it and none of DS's friends' parents seemed to know either.

Not here redshoes - almost paper-free compared to primary. Just found one letter informing me of upcoming tutor evening in DS’s bag but otherwise has been via parent pay (English trip, locker, school dinners) with info on portal.

anyone else gets half of endless letters and notes from school? we could fill a folder now...

Yes DS is fine. DD has woken up and is screaming first at me told her I was ignoring her as had 3 hours of this so she's gone to scream at poor DH. 😭 Apparently she is also refusing to eat but ate 2 chocolate bars!

Yikes *Penguins, sorry things have been difficult. It's great the school are supportive and I hope DD responds to making some better choices. Is DS o.k now?

DS2 decided not to hand the note in to his mentor as he was feeling better but did use the PE note. He seems o.k. though has been a proper smart arse tonight and I got a tad fed up of it. Perhaps he was hangry as since dinner he has been a lot less irritable. DS3 has enjoyed his day off and wants to go back to the hospital again tonight. Err nope.

Thanks and welcome Flopsy

DD fell asleep at 5.45pm after 2 hours of its not fair, I am going to annoy you so much you let me out, can't I just go out tonight, my whole life is over, I can't live without my phone. Phew long may sleep last 😎

wow been lurking,i have a DS in year 7 and have enjoyed reading this thread for those having a tough time

penguins you can have double sounds like you deserve them

penguins

Blimey penguin it's all happening for you this week

Just had DS form tutor on phone, can we pick him up, he's throwing his planner on the floor. The f/t said he had upset him discussing planners but I said no its his sister, she was announcing what she had said to him and saying she was going to get Mummy put in prison. Poor DS. DH just off to get him but at least can tell him its OK.

Oh blimey. Massive upheaval for you all then! The school sounds lovely on paper and hopefully there will be nicer people there but she needs to ditch this girl somehow! No idea how you'd get her to see that, though :/

No we have moved areas completely. She was at London grammar last year but hated it and wanted to move but comps there weren't good with SN and got very average results and fair bit of crime in town. So moved to a beautiful village by DHs work with lovely comp school with good results (35% As), no crime etc but issue is we know no-one. Obviously want her to have friends but looks like this one wasn't a good choice. She also asked me if she could have a boyfriend just to hug, told her she was too young and said she is saying no. Was all girls last year.

Urgh - what a nightmare!! Hope you manage to get it sorted out and get your lovely well-behaved daughter back. Are any of her old friends at this school with her?

Yes they are who reported it as DD told them this then school quizzed her. I left a message on her phone saying was taking phone and grounding her which led to her saying this to them. I completely understand them reporting it but hiding a child 😱 DH has spoken to them but being him hasn't mentioned there's an issue. School suggested I did but I feel quite annoyed and don't like confrontation so school then said as the safeguarding team see them regularly they could chat with them but recommended a complete ban.

Oh God, that sounds like an utter nightmare! The new friend's family sound awful and definitely to be avoided. Have you spoken to them directly about it? Have they been told the same lies about you?

Thanks for thinking of me Sassitude Hope your DD is happier now.

DD is being a nightmare because I took her phone and grounded her for going missing on Sunday, first time ever done that. She did same on Monday and told a pack of lies about me and DH to school, just had a meeting with school and boy had she gone for it. Thankfully school believed us and all they've offered us is a voluntary thing, think called a Family Support Worker but we can say no. When they read out what she had written omg I saw our children being taken away, DH regularly beats me, we wash our plates in bleach plus about 100 similar claims etc . All over a stupid phone. Last night she admitted to me she had lied due to her phone and wanting to live with her friend's cool parents who seem to have no rules.

She also said when she was missing she was at her friends parents and they lied when DH went to collect her saying she wasn't there. They have also sent their children round twice to get DD and told her to lie about where she's going and that she can stay overnight at theirs whenever she wants without telling us. First time DH caught it, second time DD knew and told her brother to lie for her. Thankfully DS came straight to get me. The school basically said avoid that family. I am really hacked off with that family as they know she's grounded plus we spent few hours on Sunday worried sick not knowing where she was and who tells kids they can stay overnight and not tell parents. Was close to calling police on Sunday and will do if they attempt to keep her again. She was perfectly behaved until started this new school, argh. I was really happy she had made new friends but . Annoying as I said no to sleepover then DH said yes. Someone maybe grounded for sometime.

Oh less you all - so many people with so much to deal with at the moment :( I hope your DS3 is OK, Frayed, and that DS2's throat is just a cold - they all seem to have them at the moment but two weeks is a long time and it won't be helping.

Lougle, how was your DD this morning?

DS actually voluntarily wore a jacket to school yesterday. Lost it. FFS.

Just giving a shout out to penguin, as I've seen another thread from her recently. Also having the paragraph issues here, so apologies for the wall of text! DD was in tears last night, not about school about something else. It's really unusual for her to be upset like that, so I am taking it seriously. We've listened, told her that she has options (it's my mantra ATM, read an article on it over the summer!) and outlined a few. Seemed to help a bit.

DD was cold today going to school. All of her jumpers are in her locker!

Oh god it never rains does it think in your shoes I'd almost he tempted to say fuck it and keep home for a couple of days .

DS2 has gone to school not sure he'll last the day. V late night as had to take DS3 to A&E last night. DS3 is ok but has had his head glued. DS2 came with me as DS3 is v attached to him. Have written a note to excuse from PE and a general explanation to mentor group teacher.

2 weeks? Poor thing. That must make everything ten times worse if he's feeling rubbish still. So sorry it's been such a hard time