Year 7 Parents Evening - Unavailable slots for core subjects

I don't think it's outdated at all. Surely working with the school and teachers to ensure our kids are happy and successful is the best approach?

@BlueLegume your views are not outdated at all. We need more of this approach. Some parents think teachers and schools are the enemy and will do everything to put obstacles in the way of effective home/school working when really all everyone wants is the best outcomes possible for kids. Team work makes the dream work!

Gosh I expected to be flamed for my old fashioned simplistic views! I really appreciate that Queenof.

I’m far far from perfect. I’m very straightforward in my approach to problems with myDC. Yes things go wrong. Where did it go wrong what can we do to avoid it happening again. Identify the problem, ie being disorganised and put a strategy in place to prop up any weakness in this area so it’s avoidable and doesn’t hinder the parts of life you are good at. I’m afraid my simplistic approach is now so outdated people don’t get it.

@BlueLegume thank goodness the overwhelming majority of parents are like you and are sensible and supportive of what schools are doing. The small but increasingly vociferous minority take up most of my time as a teacher - I agree 100% that kids aren't given the opportunity to learn from their mistakes if their parents constantly run after them or are apologists for their shoddy attitude or behaviour.

I appreciate that there were not enough appointments, not ideal but some parents will never attend a parents evening and from experience the sheet and appointments system is largely to a) ensure parents are offered the chance to turn up and so the teacher has some vague idea of who is actually planning to come and b) give the pupil responsibility to listen to the teacher tell them how parents evening in high school operates and for the pupil to follow the instructions and sign up to slots with staff. A great opportunity to see how a pupil responds to instructions and then carries out what has been asked of them. In this case a parent who is clearly very hands on was let down - I still feel that then trying to blame the system and analyse how it should be changed detracts from what actually happened - her DS did not follow the instructions. Hopefully this is a lesson learned. Most schools will happily get feedback for you from your child’s teachers at any point during the year. You should not be attending a parents evening and getting any shocks. I also preferred my child to do the talking at parents evening and see them communicate with their teacher with me there as support for both - as in “is there anything that we can do at home to help DC to improve etc?”. I’m not a teacher but having been a parent with DCs in education since the late 1990s I will vouch for the vast majority of teachers being fantastic. Demands of parents has definitely changed with time. Teach your children to be organised and I bet life becomes much easier. Parents running into school with forgotten kit, books etc etc because child has text them is ridiculous- they will never learn to be responsible and organised if Mum or dad are constantly picking up after them and smoothing the way ahead. This is not harsh it’s simply how we learn to be adults. Along with not losing sight as to what the actual problem is rather than creating another problem to blame because we don’t like the reality. Modern life is being over complicated by people searching for blame rather than simply saying DS failed to follow the instructions given by the teacher and as a result all of the slots have gone. Not ideal I will have to try and communicate with staff another way. More importantly what can I do to ensure DS learns from his mistake?

Just email or ask for a phone call. Parents evenings are 5 minute slots and if you get a parent that goes over (I had one yell at me for twenty minutes despite her daughter being the one who never did her work...) you end up pushed on again. I have done 6 till 9 non stop more than once. It’s rushed and difficult and no way would I be doing it over two nights. I have a life too!! I am always happy to phone anyone who misses it if I have concerns.

only thing that caused the issue was that the OPs DS has organisational issues

Er no there weren't enough appointments for everyone who wanted them

Most schools operate parents evening the same - it’s not an exact science but it works for most of us. I’m still amused that this thread has run for so long with various ways schools can change when the only thing that caused the issue was that the OPs DS has organisational issues. So rather reflective of some modern parents rather than work on fixing that they blame someone or something else.

Sorry, posted too soon.

....naive about how much work teachers do every day for your children. I’m glad you would never complete the bingo card, but maybe consider that your dc is at secondary school now and take a step back.

Astronotus - if you really think teachers only work 25 minutes ‘extra’ on a parents evening then you really

noble yes I have. The only way I coped was by grabbing every 5 minutes that I could. I took a pile of books in a bag and took them out one by one, choose a task that's bitty and doesn't need deep, concentrated thought.

In terms of 'lots of people work more than 25 minutes late' that is obviously true but the workload in teaching is something else. Anyone who thinks it's an easy life give it a try . The job I have now is better paid and an absolute doddle in comparison.

I am a teacher and I really enjoy parents evenings ... I like to meet the parents of the children I teach. It's a great people watching place.
Sadly I don't always get to see all parents

CarrieBlue. I never said "and I pay your wages" and I never would. Please don't put words in my mouth. She said she worked 25 minutes extra and did not refer to any other work undertaken after that. Are parents not allowed an opinion on the organisation of parents' evenings, only teachers allowed to comment? There are parents on this thread with positive comments as well. I thought this was a discussion.
Julie8008. Yes, I am not an English teacher, or any teacher for that matter - thank goodness!

Only paid til 7.30 after being in school from ~8am, doing a full day of work, then having parents evening which over runs by 25 minutes then going home and marking/planning for the next day for ~2 hours. Many people may well work more hours than they are paid for, but that doesn’t make it ok. You only really needed to add ‘and I pay your wages’ to score top marks on ‘that’ parent bingo - really unnecessary.

One teacher made DCs literally fight over his appointments sheet in the classroom

Astronotus I think you have misunderstood the meaning of the word 'literally'. Sounds like it has been a long time since you have ever been in an educational establishment.

User332. The school sent you a report and then told you to book slots with the teachers via a paper system. The school know not all parents can be accommodated so they pass that problem onto you and then expect your DC to fight to get an appointment. I've been there User. What a useless system. We didn't see some core subject teachers for 3 years. One teacher made DCs literally fight over his appointments sheet in the classroom. Disgraceful. Schools' senior management need to get their thinking caps on and try to find a better system. A - M one night and N - Z on a second? Offer an email if no slot is won? Parents will soon be told if they or their offspring step out of line, so schools need to realise they have a duty too. We particularly loved the generic sentences on school reports.

Sorry Keira, but only paid until 7.30 and yet had to stay until 7.55? Many people work in jobs where they work longer hours than they are paid for. But you are correct re computer bookings for parents' evening - the parents getting the slots will be the "quick off the mark, tech available" parents and they will do that year after year, getting ahead of more disadvantaged parents.

Schools really need to think of new ideas.

I suppose it's swings and roundabouts - when the last appointment of the day, long after dark, turns nasty and you're the furthest class from the reception area where senior staff are, I might trade that for the security of others around me ...but not for the noise, I agree!

In my last school - very interesting intake - we used to put stars on or timetables which meant 'this is a really good time for the head to come past the door to see how it is going and, if necessary, wander in, smiling warmly, hand outstretched to greet the parents and usher them out...'

I think the worst option is a classroom with only 3 teachers in it. As a parent waiting in the room, you can't help but overhear some of what is being discussed.
In a large hall there is enough general hubbub that conversations feel more private.

No! You don't want to be in a single large room, cant!
I'm in the hall with about 30 other teachers, the noise is awful, you can barely hear the parents you are talking to and have to basically shout at each other. I can barely talk by the end of the night.

I would also LOVE the secondary setup of most teachers in a single large room, or an open set of classrooms. The primary setup of individual teachers closed in a classroom with 1 or 2 parents, sometimes at the far end of a spread-out school, can be quite intimidating and one can feel quite vulnerable if things start going wrong. I loved doing parents' evening with a jobshare for that reason - always another witness, always someone there to go and get help.

The one that causes most difficulty to me as a primary teacher is the need for separated / divorced parents to have separate meetings with the class teacher, at separate times and preferably on separate nights (we have 2x2 evenings - so 2 different nights within a few days of each other, then the same set-up about a term later).

There are 36 slots of 10 minutes, over the two nights. With 32 children per class being the norm, if 4 sets of parents want / need to come separately, I am full. At one time, I used to book out 1 session in the middle to catch up lost time or, if all went brilliantly, to go to the toilet. I now usually find that every slot is full and some parents who are coming together can't book because separated parents have booked 2 slots for a single child. On the one hand, it's brilliant that non-resident, separated parents still want to be fully involved in a child's school life, and in a few cases, the safety of all means that the parents CANNOT be in the building together, let alone attend in the same slot. On the other hand, spending 20 minutes discussing the same child twice isn't an effective use of time if other parents are being deprived of a parents' evening slot altogether.

I actually love parents' evenings as a teacher. More so than as a parent in fact. Ideally I would see every parent. Doubling the number would eat into a hefty chunk of directed time though, and I'm not sure that would be the best use of the hours. Although goodness knows I've experienced enough pointless training days in my time.

A lot of responses on here mention that you only really need to see the teachers of subjects your child is struggling in.

I completely disagree. Yes you may not need to see every teacher, but one or two in subjects your child is doing well in or enjoys would allow your child to benefit from a bit of praise rather than all “problem areas/focus points”.

I myself am someone who thrives off praise and it is nice for your child to have positive feedback given directly from teacher to parent. Don’t make parents evening too heavy and negative - positive reinforcement works too!

If you prioritise seeing the teachers of the social subjects, languages and sciences you will get a very well-rounded idea of how your son's core subjects are faring.

My dc schools have had this system but I have found that it completely breaks down after the first half an hour or so, parents don’t turn up, discussions overrun etc.
So I just used to ask dc to tell teachers I was coming and put in notional slots.
In reality I would wander round and jump in where teachers had no one sitting with them or just one o person waiting. I’ve also just sat there at the end of the session to wait to see the teacher. However if this approach doesn’t work I would ask for a phone call, email or separate meeting and follow this up if it isn’t forthcoming.