Grammar school areas.... thoughts?

I felt I had to do for them all what I did for the eldest. I have always wanted them to go to the same school. So I went down the selective route. WTF?!! It isn’t a bundle of laughs is it? (But FWIW it’s possible and my youngest joins her siblings in September. I cannot tell you the relief!) very best of luck!

Yes - my third child is doing so in September. He wants to follow his brother to the SS and is capable of doing so. He's also a MASSIVE rugby fan and they don't do it at the other grammar/comprehensive. I hate the pressure that they are under, and I think it gets worse as each child sits it...but we were both privately educated and couldn't put four through, and I know I will probably get vilified on here for saying this, but for us, and for our children, this was/is the next best option.

Panicmode - will all yours sit the exam? I ask because I too have four. All mine sat it (and got in) but I became less comfortable with the whole selection process as time went on. I question whether I should have started down this road in the first place.

We are in Kent. I have four children - so far two have taken and passed the test, and for my DS, who is at a SS grammar, it has been the making of him. He was bullied mercilessly at primary for being clever, was mockingly called "The Professor" and hated every single second. Now he's able to be himself, with other boys who are geeky like him, and where it's cool to be clever and the school encourage excellence and academic success but also strongly encourages music, sport, drama etc.

My daughter could have gone to a superselective but didn't want to go on a bus for ages every day - so she is at the girl's grammar and is doing fine, but I have my reservations about it. I think it has been resting on its laurels for some time, and she would probably have been equally well served by the two brilliant local 'comprehensives', but she wanted to go to an all girls' school as she has ''too many brothers'' to want to spend even more time with boys .

I think it's a very divisive system and far too many parents have a ''grammar or bust'' attitude, without much thought to their individual children. Some of the children at my children's schools come for MILES and take hours on the bus or trains, and I think that it is utterly ridiculous and doesn't help to build a school community - friends are scattered to the four winds at the weekends so socialising can be difficult.

I think if you can close your ears to all of the playground whispers and rumours and do the best for your individual child (and be honest with yourself about their ability and personality) then they can be fantastic. I think for a heavily tutored child who just scrapes in and then flounders at the bottom, and has a parent who can proudly boast that their DC is at a grammar, it must be a miserable experience.......

I went off on a complete tangent...

What I meant to say was: keep your head down and don’t listen/engage with the mild hysteria which starts fizzing up in Foundation. Experience has taught me to keep my head down and mouth shut. I’ve gone through the process a few times, and I keep on the outside of it all.

I’m in the same area as namechangedtoday15.

Parents start being a nightmare and getting their knickers in a twist about getting into GS from Reception. Some feel entitled because they’ve bought a house in a GS area. They also believe state primaries should be responsible for getting their child to GS. It brings out the worst in people, puts pressure on the children. Results day is horrible. It’s divisive and causes problems for children. Some feel they have ‘failed’.

It’s a test of speed and accuracy. Children are in line crying, i’ve Known some vomit before they go on. There are always one or two ‘safe bets’ who don’t make and everyone is astounded. Parents and children in tears in the playground.

I don’t know if I would do it again. I don’t know if I should have done it in the first place.

My Dd had four months of tutoring. She's bright but more importantly, she isn't motivated. She's quiet and (lazy) unconfident. She missed grammar by a smidge which is the right thing for her. She will go to an outstanding sec mod (affiliated to a grammar!)
My DS has three more years. He is a sponge. He absorbs everything shown him. He absolutely needs to go to grammar. He's naturally sharp and bright. Not sure about motivated!

Finding a town that suits your family when your children are very different must surely be a factor?

I did move. From one grammar area to another because the first one was far more of a gamble for both my children (no appeal process) and the second had superior sec mods.

I think Hampshire is a good commutable fully comp area.

DD goes to a superselective grammar, not overly happy there. Not much effect on the comps as takes from a huge area so out of each comp of say 220 per year maybe 4 are missing but suspect in other areas some of these would go private so maybe talking about 1 child a year difference. DS is going to the comp, didn't try for grammar as boys is far, will be interesting to see the difference. May then move DD if still unhappy.

Either really its just that catchments for grammars are bigger generally

"She would be glad to live in area with grammar to give him a better chance"
or a good comp?

Prepared my daughter for Birmingham grammar. She was finding school a little boring at the time. Used CGP/Bond books and reading some poems excerpts from books. She got herself an AP at a private school. But I dont think she would have done this without prep. Depends what your child is like though, if they don't want to do it you can't force them. We are lucky where I live as most of the schools are pretty good and if she had ended up at local comp would have been fine with that. My DDs cousin lives in another area in catchment for failing school. My SIL is terrified he will be offered that. She would be glad to live in area with grammar to give him a better chance

We're in a SE town with one boys' and one girls' grammar school - they are both quite small schools and have a large catchment (+12 miles), kids come from a wide area. Our local schools are massive and are not hugely affected by the "loss" of grammar kids I think.

If you're interested in any grammar school, I think it would be a mistake to not prepare your child for the 11+ test - whether you help them yourself or pay someone else to help them. The sheer number of candidates sitting the tests these days makes it far more difficult to differentiate between the "naturally bright" and the "naturally bright and familiar with test formats" kids.

In theory I'm pro-comprehensive education. But in reality, given the "choices" I had for my kids, we chose to attempt the 11+ and got into the superselective grammar.

My kids have enjoyed it, I don't think they're experiencing any more pressure than if they were at any other school (they're all self-driven perfectionists, so the pressure comes from within, despite my attempts to downplay grades and not apply any pressure )

I went to a grammar school but thankfully now live in a fully comprehensive area. I do not want my DDs future dictated by one test they sit on one day when they are 10. It wasn’t a big deal when I did mine, no one really tutored.

As for fully comprehensive areas - Hampshire! Alton, Petersfield, Liphook and Winchester are all commutable to London and have great schools. (Mr Hinds’ own constituency no less - introducing grammar schools would be extremely unpopular as the comprehensives are fantastic.)

Grammar school area here. Single sex & mixed - girls single sex grammar just been voted by The Times as the best school in the country.

Vast majority of parents tutor (just for yr5, tests taken at start of yr 6). Lots of prep school children taking entrance tests too. Parents generally quite pushy, schools striving for best results - overall result is that all local schools (grammars and secondary moderns) are out performing comps in neighbouring areas where there are no grammars.

Pressure? We really tried to manage it. Only really felt it as a family because we have twins. One was probably a sure thing, the other really depended on how it went on the day.

Both passed. They do feel pressure to perform and study (now 13) but I don't think that's a bad thing. It's not so bad it's detrimental. We talk about it (as school does) as maximising an opportunity and hard work should reap a benefit. That's the same message I'm sure most schools give.

Watch E Sussex near Kent border as anywhere near border effectively becomes affected ie scramble for grammar places over border leaving “comps” without top set

If you avoid Kent, Bucks and their surrounding areas you’ll be ok

ds and dd1 both go to super selectives and dd2 will take 11+ this september.

I have very mixed feelings about the system on the whole, we live just outside the grammar area in a large town with crap schools. There are about 10 secondary schools we coudl apply to and of those I would only consider 2 to be worth attending and even those are not high on my list of favourites. Our town has a poor education record.

So, we are close to the county boundary and it turns out there are a girls and boys grammar within accessible distance in another town.

I jumped at the chance and entered my dcs and they got in.

These are not really high powerd pressured schools despite being superselective, and the thing that swung it for me with both schools was visiting them. Ds is very peer driven and I wanted him in a place where it is cool to be clever. His attitude towards school and learning has been transformed by being amongst a group where good education and high expectations are the norm.
For dd, the single sex school was a big draw, and as she is quite quirky, it has suited her extremely well.

BUT the contrast for us wasn't so much grammar v. comp, it was grammar in nice leafy town, v. comp in crap town where we live. In other towns around there are good comps, but we can't get into them, and we can't afford to move.

Though when Londoners say they are moving to Kent I have noticed they don’t say “We’re moving for the Secondary Modern Schools”

Taffeta: exactly! I am glad we have true comps not pretend-comps that are sec moderns.

I would not willingly move to a Secondary Modern County, as I believe Kent is, for example.

Though when Londoners say they are moving to Kent I have noticed they don’t say “We’re moving for the Secondary Modern Schools”

I live on the edge of a Grammar area and my son is y6. This year has been a huge eye opener for me and not in a good way! My son did one test - against my better judgement - and scraped a pass. He is in the top groups of his primary school which is far and away the best primary in the borough. He is clever and loves learning - and he wasn’t tutored. (He loved one of the schools which is why he wanted to take the test but I’m still not convinced it’s worth the travel time - as others have said.)

I would say 90% of the kids taking the tests are tutored, possibly more. Many start in year 3. I know some families who are spending £400+ a month on tutors. They’re mostly around £50 an hour. One child in my son’s class was tutored from y3, took three tests, didn’t pass any, and cried every day for weeks after the results came out.

The days of grammar schools being for clever, poor kids are LONG gone in my opinion (if they ever existed). They’re for middle class, wealthier families who can afford to tutor (I consider us to be pretty well off - we’re doing okay - but we couldn’t have afforded to tutor, if we’d wanted to).

It’s a horribly shitty system that I don’t believe benefits the kids. I would steer well clear.

sec moderns!!!!

sec modems

Lizard - yeah yeah but you don’t live in a fully grammar county

It a totally different kettle of fish when you have outstanding grammars vs failing Dec moderns

“Selective education is socially and psychologically damaging for all concerned. “

I agree with this. And I went to a Grammar. It was utterly stultifying, and although it was academic and we did the Arts (in a nice ‘accomplishments for young ladies ‘ kind of way) it was uncreative. It supported cosy, achieving conformist thinking. Monocultural. Heady days when I escaped to Uni!

I am now delighted that my kids go to a comp such as BobbyBobbins teaches in. Dc1 is a late summer born boy who I think at 10 would not have got into the super-selectives that are dotted about beyond our borough boundary, but he is now a top performing Yr 11 with a list of GCSE results way better than some of his friends who did get into those schools. (Many but not all highly tutored) Most of his top set comp peers are the same.

It’s enough to tell me that selection at 10 is way too meaningless to base a whole school system on.