Secondary school without Rugby

More children are hit by cars than seriously injured playing rugby.

Injuries happen in all sports and rugby does carry more risks but this thread seems to contain a lot of scaremongering and stereotyping of independent school beer swilling monsters.

5000 under 16s are killed or seriously injured by cars in the U.K. every year please don’t lecture me on rugby safety.

Join me in a toast for Hambo. He is the best of the best.

Thank you VanillaSugar

I'm very sorry to hear about your nephew and I apologize to you piglet but I'm not point scoring. I'm cross that lordwalter is dismissing parental concerns over school rugby.

for you piglet

*represent

And how many times have members of your family been hit by a car?

Nephew was killed by a drunk driver if that answers your question.

By the way. A close family member trialled for England. He went to hospital a lot.

Not sure what your point is.

My DF trained 3 people that have gone on to repeat home nations and 2 out of 3 in a world cup.

Not sure what the point scoring is about.

My DSD plays club hockey and has been to hospital a fair bit.

No one is arguing that rugby can't be dangerous. So can other sports.

And how many times have members of your family been hit by a car?

I know that sounds snarky but I'm cross that parents' genuine concerns have been summarily dismissed.

By the way. A close family member trialled for England. He went to hospital a lot.

I also saw 4 ambulances called to the same school within a single week. Not one of the boys had been hit by a car

My family has been involved in school rugby for many years.

There have been 2 ambulances.

Matt Hampsons charity is brilliant and supports those with injuries well.

Not all those they support have got their injuries through rugby, although they may be rugby players, at various levels. Ed Jackson and Henry Fraser fall into that category, for example.

They also support young people from other sports too.

By the way. Get well soon Hambo.

I also saw 4 ambulances called to the same school within a single week. Not one of the boys had been hit by a car

LordWalter I'd like to direct you towards the Matt Hampson Trust. Feel free to Google.

A large amount of stereotyping and preconceived ideas being demonstrated on this thread. You are more likely to be hit by a car than suffer a serious injury playing rugby.

Even if you send them to a non rugby school, how will you explain why they cannot play club rugby with their mates? If their social group currently revolves around the game it could be trickier to distract them than just swapping school.

Hello OP. Another Mum from Bucks who has also experienced prep school rugby. Our son is sporty but just not a rugby player. We are now sending out son weekly boarding to a school with no rugby. If you would like to message me I would be happy to discuss the options we looked at and share the experiences we have of the local senior schools.

If this thread hasn’t derailed to a point of no return then I’d suggest looking at Quaker boarding schools as I’m pretty sure rugby is a no-no for them. Might not be as academic as you’re after but in terms of ethos about as far removed from the rugby-playing, sport obsessed environments being discussed.

OP, I completely agree with you and have made the same decision for my children.

When I was 13 one of my friends was in a collapsed scrum. His neck broke. He nearly died and he was left paraplegic. My brothers have rugby injuries that they have from school sport. So did my father, so did my grandfather.

No way are my DSs playing rugby. It’s a week in, week out risk of injury that is way higher than in a non-contact sport. There’s no need and I’m pretty sure that history is on our side with this.

user 1471 I used to live in your area and believe me, a kid who goes to an independent school in east Yorkshire is absolutely NOT the same as a kid who goes to Wellington or Oundle

We are going to stop paying them to educate her as well if it is not sorted, and meantime we have told them exactly where they can shove everything from RugbyTots to horses.

That'll teach 'um

do you wrap you DC in cotton wool and bubblewrap

"But putting kids on horses is ultra-dumb. The stats say 20 times more dangerous per hour than motor-cycling and a typical outing containing a similar risk of death to taking an ecstasy tablet. Get the research from the internet (David Nutt on equasy is a good place to start)."
That stat is very old and very well know in the equestrian world but I believe I read somewhere recently that it has now been debunked perhaps because either was being slewed by jump jockeys or because there the eventing world has taken measures to make hitting a large solid objects at 30+mph safer. Although no one is disputing the riding is a risk sport. I have ridden all my life and fallen off more times than I can remember but (touch wood) have never experienced a serious injury although I know many who have.
To those who are not captivated by horses is must seem an "ultra dumb" hobby that they cannot understand why you would do it. To those who of us who are captivated by these extraordinary animals it is a total obsession.

User thanks, i was actually referring to those of whom the word is used.

westwood2016 (OP): Good luck in your quest, which I fully support. We have decided to rule out rugby and horse-riding from both DS and DD's schooling and moved DS from a rugby-obsessed junior school to deal with it. What part of Buckinghamshire are you in - you might be in range of Abingdon School's bus network. It is a very strong rugby-playing school but it is big enough to offer a host of other options, and there is no stigma at all from not doing the rugby. I spoke to the then Director of Sport prior to DS applying and explained that we were looking for not only an absence of compulsion to play but genuine options elsewhere. He was fine about it and very helpful. DS now very happy dividing his time between swimming and rowing. You might get more options if you look at schools that offer genuine choice about it rather than those than don't do it at all. We are now wondering where to send DD as the obsession with the game at that same junior school has not been balanced in decent resourcing, and families like us who would rather their kids learn a life-saving skill like swimming are ignored. We are going to stop paying them to educate her as well if it is not sorted, and meantime we have told them exactly where they can shove everything from RugbyTots to horses.

The horse obsessives are a much bigger nightmare than the rugby crowd. A least in rugby you can see the exercise and teamwork skills doing some good which might balance the risk, especially in a world of childhood obesity. Ditto cycling and swimming. But putting kids on horses is ultra-dumb. The stats say 20 times more dangerous per hour than motor-cycling and a typical outing containing a similar risk of death to taking an ecstasy tablet. Get the research from the internet (David Nutt on equasy is a good place to start) and send it to any school or parent that tries to rope your kid in. There is an issue with rugby not properly gathering and reporting the data that would allow the risk balance to be obsessed, and that I think is a problem with the game. Meanwhile take a look at Abingdon, though I appreciate that might put the temptation there.

Well once the gods realise they're not gods, they just come back down to earth with a bump. Just a lesson in life, I'm sure it doesn't wreck their mental health, its like anything, it doesn't even have to be rugby it could be academics. Top student, best results revered by all etc, then goes of to university and is just one of the crowd.

I do wonder what it does to a child's mental health to be treated like a god at school. It just can't be good for them. The ones who are treated like this because they are good at rugby won't realise that barely any of them will make it and if they do, the reality for the majority is playing to half empty stadiums for peanuts.

Yes, don't be silly, of course I can 'see' that it varies by institution, and like everyone else on this thread I was simply sharing my personal experience of a number of schools near me, in response to the suggestion that the 'rah rah rugby' thing doesn't exist.

We thought we'd found the 'right' school when we signed the kids up. We chose the 'least sport-obsessed' one. Music, Drama, Chess, D of E, Debating, academics etc were the sort of things which attracted us.

Unfortunately the year after our eldest joined the old Head left and was replaced with a new one who decided that the school wasn't competing successfully enough at sport with the other private schools (er... because the 'sporty' students had chosen to go to the other schools).

Suddenly Directors of Rugby Coaching were being appointed, investment in facilities was upped and the school started 'buying in' local sporting talent with ridiculously high 50-100% Sport Scholarships (other scholarships were typically 10-25% max, so this was another example of the 'demigod' 'I'm more important than you' thing). The atmosphere at the school changed within about 12 months.
I wouldn't choose to send my kids there now, but of course you typically don't want to move them mid GCSE and A level courses.

noughttimesnought
I think it was me who first said rahrah I am no middle class person. I milked cows from 14 and now work shifts. It is what rugby league (very working class sport) called rugby union. Or kick and clap. Plus many other rather rude names. Urban dictionary says someone born with a siver spòon in their mouth.
Rugby League spent a century been attacked and undermined by Union links with the wealthy and privledged. Thats why it is still seen in league heartlands, as a game for toffs, though there are many more lower classes playing it. Like my elsest. HTH

You’re supposed to eat chips, not wear them as shoulder pads. Do you take the same view of the very many great players from the welsh valleys?