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Is this typical y8 behaviour?

52 replies

ImminentDisaster · 07/10/2017 00:19

Dd finally told me tonight what's been going on at school. There's a group of y8 boys targetting the girls, persistently negatively commenting on their perceived flaws. (negging?)

DD has copped for the "you're so fat" angle. She has been trying so hard to be more confident and is a bit destroyed. We have talked about it tonight. She also says they say she is in love with someone and that she's having sex with him. She's 12. They are 12. I think it's a bit beyond teasing. They made her cry in a lesson.

I'm wondering how best to support her, obviously let the school know and keep talking to her, but what else? She's really bright, lovely, funny, was relatively innocent until Y7. They make fun of her for liking school too, ffs. I'm a bit despairing.

Anyway, we are moving soon to an entirely different area and I kind of want to believe it will be better at a new school, but if this is fairly typical then I should probably not tell her it will be. It's so depressing. Is this how it is now? Am I just so ridiculously naive?

Anyone have any useful advice or experience please? Thanks!

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Out2pasture · 07/10/2017 00:37

I would think the lack of self confidence is at the root of this being upset by bullying and the precocious sexual activity.
I would be reinforcing lots and lots of positive qualities that have nothing to do with size and discuss how beauty comes from within.
how she is loved and lovely for what ever qualities she has and that although she can be friends with young fellows of the opposite sex that sexual relations need to be put on hold for a little while until she learns to like herself more.
I would warn her to be very aware of digital media as even if you move to a new area some of this may follow her.
as for that age group...I can't say as mine are much older.

ImminentDisaster · 07/10/2017 00:21

Btw, obviously I know girls can be as bad before anyone thinks I'm being sexist. Also interested in experiences of that.

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