Where do I find the 11+ thread?

Bittersweet for me. Two equal ability twins. One 'underperformed'' God I hate that... and one got in a super selective 1300 sat for 150 places and one just missed out.

One just started grammar, one comp. It's been divisive for our family in so many ways. It's not fair on the twin who did not 'pass' as he was top set, top primary with his twin and similar 120/119 SATs. He has to see his twin go every day. Ironically, I think he is settling in better at comp though than his twin is at grammar.

I dont think any of us contemplated the impact not passing could have on both twins.

My meaningful contribution (as a Kentish yr6 parent)

The Kent test sucks.
Grammars are overrated.
10 year olds should spend summer holidays climbing trees not being tutored.
Kids with supportive parents are at an advantage.
Kids with rich parents are at an advantage.
It's not fair.
I blow a raspberry in the general direction of all things Kent test and grammar related.

I may have had wine.
Good luck to everyone whose kids have yet to take this hideousness in whatever corner of the country you are in and to those of us who survived it this week.

That's good news bacon

Am too looking forward to all being over and getting back to normality .

Feel like shit putting dd through it but if you don't try you never know and that one in a.million shot is better than no shot at all. Especially when the school she will likely go to is not some thing you even what to think about.. .

Oh good Bacon, glad it went ok.
Kathy I think you've got it right. Our situation mirrors yours (even the £50 an hour for a tutor).
Why do we beat ourselves up like this?! I've been feeling shite for the same reasons, then the more grounded , less anxious voice inside me says: he's a child! Would he really have thanked us if we'd put him through years of tutoring?
Also feeling sick and tired of competitive parents at school who pretend they aren't tutoring but are (why?) but look on me with "pity" for having "left it so late".
DS in bed now. Off to make his favourite snack (cheese scones) for the break between maths and VR exam tomorrow. Oh, and a large glass for me then bed.

Aw bacon that's lovely! I have put DD to bed in nervous anticipation of tomorrow.

Kathy, I don't think doing a huge amount makes a whole heap of difference. I do think familiarisation is the key. And once familiar, what's left to do?

Hours and hours of test papers - but still the DC needs to be able to see the question and 'know' the answer. DC like my youngest, who is not slow by any means but is a methodical worker, and have had months of practise, probably aren't that much better off. She'll spend too long on getting a question right. She'd rather be accurate, and check her work. Not a desirable quality in this process. 🙄

I've done this several times already and I don't believe it's a way of 'creaming off' the 'best'. It's a way of selecting kids who at 10 years old 'get it'. My eldest did. He coasted up until about year 10, then, when the work required effort and application, came a bit unstuck. My youngest, who may not make the GS, will apply herself from the beginning wherever she is. The end result will be the same.

It's a shit system.

Kathy, dont worry. You did your best and what worked for your family. I didn't get a tutor for my dd and she passed and I know lots who were tutored and didn't pass. My DS doesn't even want to take the 11+ and I won't make him-there are plenty of good schools round here. In my opinion your son is more likely to get the right school/ right fit for him because you haven't intensively tutored him. Far worse to pass because of tutoring and spend the next 7 years struggling to keep up despite what some parents think.

I'm having a bit of a (silly) wobble and feeling awful about it all.

I know that before this year, I was working full time and though we could have afforded tuition, we couldn't have worked out the logistics of it - I didn't pick up the kids from the childminder until 6.30pm so no chance to get to a tutor after school. And since I lost my job, though I could have got him to a tutor after school, we couldn't have afforded it, - round here tutoring is as much as £50 an hour. BUT I'm still feeling a bit wretched about it all and feeling like I've spoiled his chances. He might pass and we have done some preparation at home, but how can he compete with kids that have had tutoring for two or three years, no matter how bright he is?

There are good comps round here, and I'm not even convinced the grammar schools are all that, so I know I'm being stupid, but I feel so guilty!

So agree with you Foxy about the CEM test papers. Example: 23 maths QQ in 9 minutes. WTF?!!

How did those dcs who did the test find it today? Don't want to discuss it with those local to me as all too horrible at school gate but is such a big deal I wanted to just chat a bit!

This is the only test in your life that you can't resit. It's fecking ridiculous isnt it.

Luckily DD is currently more concerned about her Saturday afternoon plans for celebrating doing the test.

Oh, sorry, just seen I'm too late........

I'm in Kent if I can help?

You're right MrsP it is indeed a test of speed and technique.

My DD would do well at GS (her siblings are all there) but she won't be able to answer the questions fast enough.

This is the ONLY time they are tested in this way. How is it a measure of intelligence?

We are s bucks though not Kent

My dd us doing this next week too.

She still gets panicky with a time limit so not hopeful tbh.

She's very good at the nvr which of course is the least important part...

Good luck to everyone's dc

It's an awful system and so competitive. Unfortunately being top table isn't always enough in a highly selective area. Tutored children do have an advantage as it's a test of speed and technique rather than pure knowledge in my opinion.

We have it in about 10 days. I was overconfident based on y3 parents evenings comments and performance in tutors initial assessment. However although we have had tutoring for a year it has become clear that although bright my daughter is finding the run up and exam thing very stressful and so I have backed right off and beginning to wonder if her personality is suited to it. We have done some summer prep for it but not much judging by some things I hear! She is adamant she wants to sit it so we will give it a go but am not feeling confident. However I am also not thinking it's the end of the world if she doesn't pass which I must admit until 12 months ago I did! The reality is that the non grammar options are not bad as all schools in our borough are in reality pretty good. Certainly much better than some other areas.

We've got CEM tests - absolutely no time, loads of questions and just general hideousness.

I wish I'd never started the whole thing.

Yes, I agree with you all. My son is at the best school in the borough (purely through luck because of us liking this house - not through our judgement as he was v small when we moved!) and in the top group in his class (don't mean to sound boasty) and I keep saying if he doesn't pass then the system's wrong, not him. We've not tutored either but lots in his class have been tutored for two or three hours a week since y3. We're fortunate that I've not found any gaps in his knowledge and he seems to have learned everything he needs to know at school already but I know others won't be so lucky. It's a horrible system and it makes me feel a bit uncomfortable actually.

'Not an easy'

Unfortunately a lot of privates have exams that are just as tough now - so it's nice t an easy option anymore.
Not sure which area you're in but here Maths was level 6 possibly even level 7.
Feeling all your pain and wishing luck x

Oh God F*ing NVR. How I loathe it. When my Ds asked me why it was in the tests, in an admittedly unguarded moment I told him it was to weed out as many kids as possible then said the same thing as KathyBeale. I now realise why others have been doing tutoring for ages but we just didn't want to go down that route (not to mention the expense) save for a few sessions over the summer to cover gaps in his learning. I was horrified to hear the maths tests he will sit are based on year 6 maths. FFS!
Good on you Bacon for boosting your DS. I've been warned that despite being told DS is "clever" etc he should not see it as a poor reflection on him if he is not offered a grammar school place.

It does irritate me that the system makes it "easier" for those with more funds as the independent school exams aren't till January so there is more time to prepare and they are a bit older.

Deep and slow breaths...
Good luck all.