Where do I find the 11+ thread?

It is. I know some parents who are GS focussed from year 3 and won't contemplate the local high (had a bad reputation but has been turned around). They start wittering on about percentages who 'succeed' from the primary school, demanding numbers (which we don't have as it's nothing to do with the primary school). I probably was the same though with my oldest. Seemed like a no-brainier at the time, but if I knew then what I know know, i might have made different decisions. Hindsight is a wonderful thing.

School not scufor!?!

Foxy one of the issues I struggled with is that I think it is incredibly hard to know what a school is REALLY like until your child is in it. For primary, we visited the local school liked it (just as well, as there wasn't really any choice) and were pleased to send our DD there. But it turned out to have a number of issues and not to suit DD. So we moved her. Now she has been in scyfor a while we do know more about what she is like and what suits her. But I do think it is a bit of try your best to find a good match and hope, sadly.

hidden Grammar school might not suit your DC - not because it's a GS but because it just might not. I'm really not convinced that the pastoral care is up to much at the one my DCs attend. I don't feel the teachers know my children (or are that interested in their personal development). Other GSs in the area have a very different feel, and I do think the local high school has more about it as it isn't an exam factory.

I've let my DCs choose their school (rightly or wrongly) and saw the 11+ as a way of maximising their options. Obviously now my youngest is in the process I'm shitting it because the school she wants to go to is the one That her siblings go to.

Thanks @ParadiseCity and @Love2dance. It's been a tough year.

Completely empathise with the story about the costings. So far the gs has asked for an autumn term contribution of £100 and I know they expect the same for othet terms, on top of bus pass costs and £450 school uniform (sports kit was 200 alone)

Agree with that. Grammars def don't cream off the brightest at all!
I chose to go down a less pushy path full of cramming - yes DS had a tutor but I avoided the ones who were too pushy. Was it the right thing to do? I think so - the whole thing is just so distasteful- I've never felt comfortable about it and you know where or if you want to draw the line.
DS is now at secondary and he's happy there.

Grammar schools don't actually select the top x% of children, they select x% of children who can do well in a test on a certain day. They want all rounders who will go on to do well in other tests. Good luck to the lot of them, and remember they all do the same GCSEs, A levels etc.

Needless to say In bucks it makes up only 30 percent of the result and of course it's the one thing dd consistently does well at...

Shit school here we come

....I should add that one of my DC was in the same boat - found NVR/spatial easy but really struggles with spelling and other stuff.

Ha! For those saying NVR is a waste of space, try spatial reasoning that's now part of the Kent test! Its one saving grace is that it's untutorable!

Hope all goes well for all those sitting too!

We will be in this situation in two years. What worries me is that we are close (ish) to one super selective but the other grammar schools are a long way off. So all our eggs for grammar have to be in one basket.

Oh blimey. I certainly didn't mean to criticise anyone who is good at NVR. And yes I probably am jealous. I don't understand it at all. But I stand by my assertion that it's useless! I'm well into my 40s and I've never had to work out what shape comes next in a sequence!

I must have missed something ....

For all those celebrating the fact it's all over...

Well done to your amazing children for getting through it

Hope your nails survive til results day...

I'm sure they are smart and capable and you are so proud of them whatever the numbers say

I'm confused. Who was blowing out someone's candle? I openly admit to venting as this stuff is challenging. Having said that DS is doing better at NVR than anything else during practice so he's probably more intelligent than I am

I must say some of your comments about NVR made me laugh..... just because it's my DS's real strength. He just gets it, easy as pie he gets it. Whereas the stuff that I'd think was easy he finds tricky like spelling or some aspects of English / VR. Every child has a weakness and a strength and belittling his when he openly admits that some of the other areas wouldn't be easy for him I find bizarre and actually you sound jealous tbh. Just because you don't get it doesn't mean it's worthless. I've actually read that it's a great indicator of natural intelligence but I couldn't care less, we all think our children are amazing and they are, whether they pass a test or not. I wish all of your children every success and all the very best luck...

I have actually found this test hideous and a real eye opener. I know I've signed him up for it but looking back I'm wondering was it worth it?! Time will tell I guess x

Blowing out someone else's candle won't make yours shine any brighter.

😘

DS ok I think. At least he knows what it's like now.
Relaxing at last with Steely Dan.

Finished, last child, never again. RELIEF.

Calm, positive thoughts and best of luck to everyone.

Middle I feel for you too. This system is so not fair. Having said that, a child at the right school (including comp) can really blossom and I hope both of yours will. Nothing is set in stone or forever so once they've settled in (or not), if you feel a move would benefit either, you can do something about it, although I appreciate it isn't easy.

KDF: totally agree.

Now waiting on tenterhooks nervously scoffing a fry up while DS sits his exam this morning.

Bloody hell @KathyBeale that is nuts!

On the other extreme I know one (single, working) mum who discouraged her DD from taking the test because she was worried about the transport costs of sending her child to a grammar school.
Our town only has a comprehensive, walking distance from her home. The £280 a year travel pass is just too much for her to consider.

Such a rigged system.

Kitchen, you are absolutely right. I know people spending £400 a month on tutoring. It's so unfair.

My son has just told me that two boys in his class DID NOT GO ON FAMILY HOLIDAYS this summer because they "had to study". I am appalled. (And slightly desperate for my son to pass now just so I can feel superior for not pushing him.)

Middle I really feel for you. DD looks up to her older brother and is putting herself under pressure to match him. At least for me they are in different cohorts. For twins its so unfair. The whole system is shit.

kitchen that's pretty much how I feel.