Excluded for admitting bring friend's bong into school

Is it exclusion at home? Ours get sent to the exclusion unit and work sent down. It sounds grim in there but it keeps them in school and stops them roaming the streets when they are excluded.

I agree with previous posters: back up school, have a frank chat about drugs and re-evaluate the friendship.

School should send work home during the exclusion so that he doesn't miss anything.

I teach in a school for students with social, emotional and mental health difficulties. 90% of our boys have been excluded from at least 1 school. Our boundaries for behaviour have to be very, very different to mainstream schools. I get told to fuck off 10 times a week and have tables thrown around reasonably regularly.

And yet we would permanently exclude for bringing a bong to school. I know you have every reason to believe your son but everyone says "it's for a friend" or "I don't smoke". Neither excuse counts for much.

How has your son reacted?

I think you are massively underreacting! A bong? In year 8? And you're arguing that his punishment should be reduced?
I would ground him for the entire summer and consider moving him schools. You will get people on here saying it's not that bad, but it is huge in my world.

I'm astonished that he wasn't expelled. I wonder what the other parents make of this.

I agree you need to punish at home too, and ban him from seeing this other boy. You can just say to the mum they are clearly a bad influence on each other, so you think for the time being best they stay apart.

An incredibly light punishment, I am amazed he didn't get an immediate permanent exclusion, he would have done in most schools

Most schools have a zero tolerance towards drugs and their use. The "friend" excuse just doesn't cut it. Maybe this is an opportunity for him to reevaluate his friendships.

Tbh let him take the 5 days exclusion and be thankful it was that light I've known colleges to make it two weeks or permanent for that offence.

Don't be appealing for a lesser punishment. He's lucky not to be permanently excluded. You need to be seen to be completely on the side of the school and how serious this is. Consider the fate of adults who "mule" drugs into certain countries.

He has to do the punishment I'm afraid. I know it's not great for his education but I think as a parent you have to back the school in this. If you don't you undermine them and send a very bad message to your son that it wasn't as bad as all that afterall. My son's been in trouble at school and it is backed up by consequences at home - usually grounding and confiscation of things he values.
It's a harsh lesson but one he needs to learn, I'm afraid. He's in year 8. I can guarantee the issue of drugs and paraphernalia will only grow over the next few years, so you need to come down hard.
Sorry you're going through this

I think just let him deal with the consequences, sorry but highly unlikely he doesn't smoke but his friends do and he's carrying a bong around.

Does your son really need a freind like that?
Why has the other mad even got a bong?
What did his mum say if you are freinds has she spoken to you about it?
If it were me I would keep him away from this so called friend.
It's one thing owning and using something like that but totally another to ask someone to carry it for him knowing it is illegal.
Probably a good lesson for your son now not to be stupid enough to carry something illegal on behalf of someone.

Yes. He brought drug paraphernalia into school. He's also hanging out with drug users. You may need to rethink how "interested " he is. He also clearly wasn't able to resist peer pressure in this instance. Very worrying.

He brought a bong into school - presumably knowing that it was intended for others to smoke at school. That's a serious issue, whether he owns it or not, he was complicit in the action. So yes, the school is punishing them both as they were both involved.

I'd be having a frank chat with your sin as he obviously hasn't taken on board what you've discussed previously, getting together with the mother, having a chat with her, and then both families sitting down to discuss how stupid they've both been. I wouldn't be blaming the other boy though yet until you know his side of the story. And I think 5 days exclusion is quite a light punishment, you should be grateful.

I think he should probably suffer the natural consequences of making a bad decision. How else does he learn.