Tricky expat choices - 11+ Year 7 entry boarding vs Year 9 day school (academic)

Assuming you have no family near by and Ive read this right you're going to need full boarding for years 7 and 8 then weekly/flexi/day from then on.
In the UK the vast majority of boarding schools are weekly/flexi with full boarders very much in the minority especially in the lower years, as you can see from some on the comments on here UK family do not have much appetite for boarding especially under 13's. From personal of my own DS's boarding at this age experience its pretty miserable for a 11/12 hear old to be in school all weekend with a handful of others when most of your fronds have gone home and even harder if your parents are in the US.
I'm not overly knowledgable on girls boarding schools but I think you might struggle to find a school in the Home home counties that has lots of full borders in yrs 7 and 8 and that offers weekly/flexi/day as well.
If I was you I would look at a boarding prep which has a goos number of full boarders and,which is preparing children for 13+ entry, Dragon has already been mentioned and the other one to consider is Windlesham House it has an excellent reputation. They will be able to advise you as to what senior schools to look at.
"I went to boarding school aged 10 - so a little earlier than your DD but similar. My brother started at the same time as me and our family has never recovered emotionally, we haven't really felt like a family since. I've recently cut contact with my brother as he's so angry and unpleasant, and I struggle with my parents who I feel delegated actual parenting for half of my childhood."
Just to add another perspective. My DS's boarded from an early age DS2 from 7, we are happy loving well adjusted if eccentric family, we couldn't feel more "like a family" if we tried. Over the years numerous people have actually commented on what a happy family we are, these comments have come from a wide range of people: non boarding children who've holidayed with us, health care professionals, other parents often anti boarders, even total strangers etc and no one in our family is "angry or unpleasant". I'm not under any illusions some hate boarding and its ruined their lives especially thirty + years ago but many thrive and it does not damage them as people or their relationship with their family. I'm not saying definitely board and its much harder when you're so far away, but just consider all your options with an open mind.

why are people recommending Surrey schools

I imagine it's because the OP said "We are flexible on location within West London out to Home Countries in Surrey (possibly Berks/Bucks)."

If your DD boards from 11+, you may find that she prefers to continue as a boarder even when you are back in UK. How would that sit with you?

I've been trawling round the SW London day schools for DD's 11 plus next year. As someone said upthread I'm surprised at the movement between all these schools in the first few years. I've been shown around by various girls who seemed to join at random times- from other schools, from families that have moved etc.
I suspect it's all a lot easier to join in other years than people think.

Aldenham (not especially academic but gets the best out of all kids) has a 13+ entry and is always looking to increase girl numbers as it's boy heavy. You should have no problem getting a place. You could live in NW London / Herts or further into N London as they have a fairly extensive coach service plus boarding too.

I did not spot this. Then why are people recommending Surrey schools normally only considered by London parents for those kids struggling to find a place in London selective day schools.

Assuming you are headed back to London (a typical MN assumption)

It's not an assumption, that's what the OP says.

With a day school you get to spend time with your child. With a boarding school you don't.

How is that not the main issue for you?

i have a friend who is a teacher at a London girls day school.The impression i have from her is that they are starting to factor in possible impact of Brexit on their numbers, and therefore are thinking about whether they need to change theirapproach to admissions and ocassional vacancies. i think that means that they expect more occasional vacancies and that they may be prepared to be a bit flexible to taking on a good student even if it takes them a bit above ideal class size in the short term.

I think it will depend on your daughter's personality how easy it will be to join a school in a later year than the main start point. I know a couple of girls who have moved schools (in one case part way through a year). One was miss popular at her new school from day 1 and the other took a little longer to build a friendship group than when she started her original school in y7 but is now fine.
Schools often do a class reshuffle at the start of Y9 and that does cause changes in friendship groups. I think joining at the same time as a class reshuffle would make it easier, so it might be worth asking the schools you speak to when they shuffle their classes.

In London there is quite a lot of movement at 13+. Girls will leave day schools to go boarding, and academic schools often have an bit of a weed out of those kids not putting the effort in. And obviously expat kids get relocated.

Also many schools will be reshuffling classes and children will be selecting options, so being new will not be obvious in all but the smallest schools.

Assuming you are headed back to London (a typical MN assumption) I would contact registrars of suitable schools (G&L, LEH, some of the GDSTs etc) and ask about the likelihood of occasional places, and the process. They will have taken children from different educational systems at this point (not least the Lycee CDG seems to shed a few pupils at this stage) and nearer the time should be able to give you an idea of what catch up would be sensible.

Given occasional places are unpredictable, you might need to apply to a few schools. Of do as others suggest and look toward some of co-ed day/weekly boarding schools on the periphery of London. (Though these are often less academically selective than London day schools.)

My daughter is starting at an independent boarding/day school this September and they add in another small class worth of girls at 13+ so she wouldn't be alone and there would be scholarships etc open for girls starting at this point to apply for. I think it depends on the school, if you find a school you all love then ask about 13+ intake, your problem would be solved.

I went to boarding school aged 10 - so a little earlier than your DD but similar. My brother started at the same time as me and our family has never recovered emotionally, we haven't really felt like a family since. I've recently cut contact with my brother as he's so angry and unpleasant, and I struggle with my parents who I feel delegated actual parenting for half of my childhood.

There weren't the distance issues and I'm sure there will be plenty of posters along to talk up how boarding made them wonderfully independent etc, but wanted to get in another view. You say your DD is keen on boarding, but this is also how my mum rationalises it to me - I 'wanted to go'. But aged 9 I'd been given the hard sell by them about how fun it would and had no concept of what leaving home actually meant. Additionally I was bullied by the girls I shared a room with which is admittedly a worst case scenario. But please do think this through carefully, and I wish you the best of luck in whatever you decide. Incidentally I moved schools at 14 and immediately made friends - year 10 felt like quite a good time to start as everyone was growing out of childhood friendships and finding their teenage cliques.

My dds are in private academic London day schools.
I've been astonished at the number of children leaving and joining.
Their school take an additional class at yr9 (13+ entry). That's the route I would go down.

I should add that Woldingham is a Catholic school but you do not need to be Catholic to go there.

You might want to look at Woldingham. Wonderful grounds, fantastic facilities esp the theatre. They take 60 at 11+, probably about a third of whom are borders, and quite a few of these are overseas. My DD is in Y8 and has two girls from USA in her year, although not sure if the family are overseas. They also have another 30 join at 13+ and more girls tend to board as they go up the school. They run a team building day early on in Year 9 to help integrate the new girls.

DD is starting Sixth Form at a private school, and they have entry exams at 13+ which they wouldn't be doing if they weren't willing to take them on. As said, contact a few schools to get a feel. Many will be breaking up in the next week or so and then they'll be a long break (obviously some staff will be around) so if you want to make a decision or have something to think about before September, it's worth contacting them now.

I did a similar thing - went boarding in year 6 while my parents were in Canada - they thought having a term in the system ahead of 11+ would help. (Not suggesting you need to do that - and it didn't work out that way for me anyway as they stuck me up a year so I never took the damn exam anyway).

There are more year 9 entries than there used to be, but mostly in co-ed and , ironically, girls only boarding as the trad girls schools have had to accommodate to the changes caused by the former boys boarding schools going mixed.

The top academic london day schools (random selection - Paul's girls, city of london, godolphin and latymer, james allen) do not generally have formal 13+ entry so if you wanted those you would be relying on occasional places, which could be tricky from a distance (but worth asking them if they have a less overt route). The top london schools are horribly oversubscribed - there will be more flexibility at the good country schools.

To explore the 11+ boarding option, you are looking for a very particular school - decent boarding so she has a good time at weekends in the first years, but also decent day for when you return. And commutable. Have a look at st Catherine's Bramley which I think would fit that profile.

I suppose you could also consider a boarding prep like The Dragon if the years worked , which could hedge your bets about which path to take at 13+ , if the timings worked out. But it would involve 2 school moves.

I would ring the Registrars at Epsom College & St Johns Leatherhead, I think you will be pleasantly surprised to see how keen they are on taking girls at 13+. Both schools give you mixed day and boarding options with entry at 11 & 13. if you look at the school bus routes they give you a large list of areas to commute from if you go for day. Your ds could enter at 11. The facilities at both are stunning and St Johns has a wonderful atmosphere.

Many independent schools add more than 20% at 13+ and are often more flexible on entry criteria and timing for overseas candidates even if they largely rely on pretesting and Common Entrance. Some only intake at 13+. Dc school sets its own 13+ papers taken in November for entry the following September and this is increasingly common. Numbers rise from about 90 to approx 130. Do register early though as candidate lists may close over a year ahead of the exam sitting for some schools or they may pretest at 11 then make offers for 13+.

From my own limited experience as a mother (DD is 20 months old!) and from my friend who cried on my shoulder at every holiday for two years while she was boarding in the UK - I wouldn't do it. It is really very far to send an 11/12 year old when there is a clear alternative to enter at year 9 down the line. It's one thing when children from Asia and Africa are sent to the UK for an education as there's a big difference between staying home and going overseas. If she's in a good American school honestly it doesn't seem necessary.

Also what would happen if the expat posting was extended and you didn't end up moving back on schedule? I'm currently overseas as an expat myself and this happens all the time.