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Original poster

Year 7 boys - disorganised and irresponsible

87 replies

Strix · 02/02/2017 20:08

DS1 is quite academic and has started a highly selective grammar. But he is soooooo irresponsible, disorganised, and would lose his head if it wasn't attached to his neck.

He is sooooooooooo much work. I'm exhausted. People tell me it's a boy thing. Is it???

Do other people with Year 7 boys find them incapable of organising themselves.

Since September we have lost/broken:
4 iPhones
At least 5 Oyster cards
3 coats
A couple wallets
Several house keys
One complete spots kit (PE and rugby gear included)

DD is 13 and she has never lost a phone, Oyster card, sport kit, etc.

Am I alone?

OP posts:
roseshippy · 02/02/2017 21:44

Apple is terrible value for money. Get much more with Android

TresDesolee · 02/02/2017 21:27

Tbh these days I just buy the cheapest stuff available (trainers from two seasons ago on sale online, Tesco Value stationery) because I know he'll probably lose it.

Bythebeach · 02/02/2017 21:25

Mine also yr 7, grammar and what I would call disorganised has been pretty good so far surprisingly. No lost phones nor clothes. PE bag left on the bus once which entailed retrieval from bus station and one incident where he left school shoes at school sports centre when he had after-school rugby and had to pick them up on way in and one text plea to bring in a maths book he'd forgotten (luckily hadn't yet left house with younger sibs). Not brilliant but I was expecting worse!!

tribpot · 02/02/2017 21:11

No lost phone here. He's not a big user of it anyway but I think he knows he would be in a lot of trouble if he did and certainly wouldn't get a replacement.

Key - it's on a curly lanyard thing attached to his bag.

Coat - he doesn't wear unless it's very cold indeed.

Plenty of Android phones available for far less than an iPhone and which have Calendar/Reminder functionality on. Even a Windows phone can manage that!

CasparBloomberg · 02/02/2017 21:01

DS in year 7 and has only misplaced phone once so far, although it did require an hours drive to retrieve it so he repaid my time completing a list of chores I could have done in one hour. Thankfully he hasn't lost it again so I hoped he learned his lesson until we had to retrieve his house key tonight. :(
He has also lost a brand new pair of football boots and every item from his pencil case (and one pencil case) at least twice. His school coat was eventually recovered. Labels seem to make no difference. Would love to know if tough love and not replacing stuff is the answer to get him to take care of things more, but feel we need to make sure he is fully equipped.
Has anyone had any success in helping a child improve?

Original poster
Strix · 02/02/2017 20:55

The first iPhone was new, and a reward for getting into the Grammar. Ferocious competition. A real achievement. Lost it. Next iPhone old and used iPhone 4. It was a rubbish phone and met its demise when Ds and cousin splashed it with water at poolside. Next was iPhone 5s. It was damaged. I thin Ds got mad and smashed it in temper tantrum. I had enough at this point and gave him an Alcatel brick. After five months, I really needed him to have a tool for organisation (i.e. iPhone calendar /reminder functionality). So reluctantly gave him another used5s. Last week I discovered it was damaged but still working. I took it away and he has no phone at all at the moment.

Arrrggghhhhhhh!!!!!!!Angry

OP posts:
TheSecondOfHerName · 02/02/2017 20:38

Boy (now Y12) - was disorganised & forgetful in Y7 and still is now. Regularly loses keys, oyster cards, coats etc.

Boy (now Y10) - never loses anything, was v.organised in Y7.

Boy (now Y8) - rarely loses anything, was mostly organised in Y7.

Girl (now Y8) - rarely loses anything, was a bit disorganised & forgetful in Y7 but has improved a lot.

SaucyDough · 02/02/2017 20:33

4 iPhones?!?! Were they replaced through insurance?

iMatter · 02/02/2017 20:32

Depends on the kid I think.

I have a ds aged 12 in almost exactly the same boat (grammar etc) but he hasn't lost anything at all so far (touch wood). He's always been really organised and taken responsibility. Tbh I worry that he's a bit anal about stuff like that and can panic a bit if everything isn't "just so"

His brother who is a year younger is a very different story altogether. I don't think Y7 will go as smoothly for him...

If either of them lost a phone they'd be onto a bog standard cheapie.

christmaswreaths · 02/02/2017 20:31

I also agree that it's not a boy thing. With my children it improved with maturity. I would not be buying another iPhone though and would make him feel some of the pain.

TresDesolee · 02/02/2017 20:14

Don't want to add to your misery OP but it's not a boy/girl thing. My eldest DS has always been incredibly disorganised and remains so in Y9. My Y7 DS2 could organise an international summit and barely break into a sweat. He was born organised

Not sure what the answer is to the disorganisation other than ceaseless nagging. Although I've noticed that when it comes to things my DS1 really values (phone, expensive coat he got for Xmas) suddenly things don't seem to get lost quite as much, so there's an element of control there

Peppapig · 02/02/2017 20:10

4 iPhones??? Mine would have a cheap brick after 1 lost phone!

It's not just boys btw, my yr 7 dd has lost several school books so far and my yr 10 lost her PE bag but not the kit, no idea how.

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