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Original poster

Temporary exclusion and threatened permanent exclusion

193 replies

user1483060276 · 30/12/2016 01:22

I have a resolution meeting at the school in the New Year. Son (15) was caught with cannabis in school and excluded. They have also threatened to permanently exclude him.

Has anyone been to an "resolution meeting", what should I expect, and how can I best prepare?

OP posts:
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Kr1stina · 14/01/2017 22:45

Thanks for the update and glad to hear it went well. Hopefully he's had a big fright and he will get his act together.

How are you feeling about it all OP?

Sadik · 14/01/2017 19:33

Glad to hear things went well User. Hopefully the support he's been offered will help him sort himself out and move on.

user1484226561 · 14/01/2017 18:30

I have never ever come across a situation where a pupil was found to be in possession of drugs, and ever attended a lesson in that school ever again. Indefinite study leave is common though. Are they going to take him back after?

I have to say, from your description of his attitude, it sounds to me like there is so much of that crap in his brain that you are effectively communicating with walking talking cannabis rather thn a teenage boy.

sanityisamyth · 14/01/2017 02:04

Sounds positive :) bet you're both relieved!! Hopefully he'll stay on the straight and narrow and get his schooling sorted now :)

Original poster
user1483060276 · 14/01/2017 00:20

Sorry, the meeting was earlier this week, I should have updated before now.

The school were actually very supportive.

They have officially ended the exclusion, however they have granted him study leave for the duration of the prelims. They gave him a study pack with revision material and the classwork that he will miss.

They've made a referral to a local youth substance abuse team where he will meet with a councilor, what the next step for that is depends on how the initial chat with the councillor goes.

They appreciated his letter of apology, but were clear that the letter alone was not enough, and they asked both of us to sign a behaviour contract.

He will also meet with the Ed. Psych to have a review of his support needs (he was diagnosed with Aspergers and Sensory Processing Disorder as a young child, but its mild so hasn't received any support with this for years).

There was no further talk of permanent exclusion, however they were very clear that a repeat of this would not be tolerated.

All in all, it was a lot better than I had been fearing.

OP posts:
sanityisamyth · 13/01/2017 19:39

Any update on this?!

Groovee · 06/01/2017 10:43

School may not be back yet. Our schools are back Tuesday in Edinburgh x

user789653241 · 06/01/2017 09:37

Any updates?
I assume she won't be coming back unless ds get good results though...

CrochetQueenfromCoventry · 03/01/2017 20:11

Local authorities in Scotland make it VERY difficult for schools to permanently exclude children. As it affects their exclusion and attainment rates. It is the first thing they have to justify when HMIe come to visit schools/local authority.

BratFarrarsPony · 03/01/2017 19:52

it could be Reds, it certainly crossed my mind.

Redsrule · 03/01/2017 19:45

Sadly I think it is a distinct possibility your DS is the in school dealer. It would appear that is what the other pupils have stated. I think you are significantly minimising your problems.

BratFarrarsPony · 03/01/2017 19:28

" Has he said why he does not want to name the dealer? Is it because he is afraid of them? Or is it out of a misplaced sense of loyalty? Or is he worried about the wider consequences, e.g. being seen as a grass, others being angry they have lost their supply? Or is he claiming to not actually know the dealer's name? "

I'm sorry but that just sounds impossibly naive. I don't suppose he wants to get his head kicked in , do you?

MargotsDevil · 02/01/2017 21:00

I think Kr1stina has summarised beautifully - it's a shame the OP seems to have left the thread though.

Graphista · 02/01/2017 20:46

Kr1stina does have a good handle on this I think.

Definitely true that for the most 'prestigious' courses it is NOT just about exam results. I have a lot of friends and family are teachers and they write ucas and other refs and as in other areas of life there's WAYS of putting across something without explicitly saying it that the unis will understand.

Op needs to stop going on about her sons rights, how cannabis is 'no biggie' etc and get her and her sons act together before this meeting.

thatdearoctopus · 02/01/2017 18:17

I presume this school is considered a "good" one, if you want him to stay there. If it's good, that will be because of the high standards it imposes and expects from its pupils. Why should your son remain there if he has shown such a disregard for its expectations?

Kr1stina · 02/01/2017 17:41

I think the UCAS reference is very important here. I am sure that reference writers are quite capable of conveying 'entitled arse' without ever writing the words

YY. My child has just got a copy of their UCAS reference and I was asking a friend ( who teaches at another school ) about it. She said exactly what you said.

For some courses it doesn't matter at all, but for others it's crucial as they screen all references .

thatdearoctopus · 02/01/2017 16:06

Schools swap "troublesome" pupils around all the time in order to protect themselves from the impossible headache of permanent exclusions. Just because you can't find statistical evidence anywhere does not mean they aren't (effectively) taking place.

GnomeDePlume · 02/01/2017 15:41

I think the UCAS reference is very important here. I am sure that reference writers are quite capable of conveying 'entitled arse' without ever writing the words. This is what makes me think that a fresh start somewhere else may be better all round. If he is as bright as the OP thinks then a year or two of having to make his own academic way may be rather good for him.

BoneyBackJefferson · 02/01/2017 15:33

chances are though that as its a "resolution meeting" it will be a slap on the wrist and a firm set of rules that he will have to abide by.

BoneyBackJefferson · 02/01/2017 15:31

Kr1stina

The problem is that managed moves have to be agreed by all parties, (parents and schools), and from what I can tell the OP won't agree to it. That will leave the School and the OP in a very poor position.

Kr1stina · 02/01/2017 14:41

I think the OP might be slightly misled by the official statistics, which show that a tiny amount of pupils ( less than 10 year in the whole country ) are removed from the register.

I suspect that's because most are managed out, rather than going down the permanent exclusion route . My children attend one of the best schools in the country and I know of two kids who have been 'forced to leave ' durning the last couple of years - one for drugs and another for sexual offences. I doubt very much that they will show up in the official statistics so I can only assume that they were somehow persuaded to leave and continue their education elsewhere.

So even if you think that removal from the register is an idle threat, I strongly suggest that you and your son eat humble pie. They may not be able to exclude him but you really don't want to piss off the people who will be writing his UCAS reference. The days when you walked into some of the most prestigious courses as long as you had 6As are long gone.

LadyLance · 02/01/2017 13:55

I think not naming the dealer could be a big stumbling block- supplying illegal drugs to teenagers is obviously a big deal, and I'm sure the school will want to know who he bought from, especially as he has admitted it was an older student.

Has he said why he does not want to name the dealer? Is it because he is afraid of them? Or is it out of a misplaced sense of loyalty? Or is he worried about the wider consequences, e.g. being seen as a grass, others being angry they have lost their supply? Or is he claiming to not actually know the dealer's name?

I think you and he will both have to accept that this is something the school is likely to push for, and refusing to name the dealer will make him look even more guilty. If they get any sense he was supplying the drug, I expect it will become a criminal matter, which could become very serious indeed.

FrancisCrawford · 02/01/2017 12:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GingerHollyandIvy · 02/01/2017 12:16

Kr1stina A very good summary of the whole situation.

Kr1stina · 02/01/2017 08:36

Your son is a dick, lots of teens smoke weed but not many are dumb enough to take it into school and get caught with it

I think the stupidity has been compounded by

Not naming the dealer
Minimising ( it was just herbs)
Child not taking it seriously
Parent not taking it seriously
Neither seeking help for his drug use
Parent not accepting that school could exclude
Parent insisting that school must respect the child's rights
Parent who states that her child is going for a prestigious course and therefore the alternatives are not suitable for him ( which sounds like 'my child is far too clever to be placed with the riff raff' )