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Original poster

ASD in mainstream secondary

212 replies

Verbena37 · 19/09/2016 20:55

Hi,
DS yr 7 diagnosed HFASD last winter and has started at secondary two weeks ago.
On a positive note, I think he prefers having lots of new subjects to learn but from a pastoral side of things, I'm just not sure what to expect, and at what level, from staff.

I already met with the SENCo last term so they know his issues and needs yet since he started, and I realise it's only early days, I've been having to email school to point out issues that I would think staff would be more thoughtful about. Stuff like organising his time and not being able to remember noting down homework and not remembering to go to the loo before lessons start etc.

To the staff, I'm pretty sure they think me overprotective but for DS, who has had late night meltdowns for the past two weeks, it's not trivial but things that would enable him to feel less anxious.

Am I hoping for too much? I almost feel apologetic that I have to raise things with them.

OP posts:
AndNowItsSeven · 20/09/2016 00:13

My dd who has Asd has been given a toilet pass so she is allowed to leave class to go to the toilet either when she needs a wee or when feeling anxious and needs a few minutes " time out".
Several kids have these so no other student knows whether she has Asd or a physical reason for needing a toilet pass.

noblegiraffe · 20/09/2016 00:05

What I really want is for his teachers (all of his subject teachers) to remember and understand his issues

I am supportive of students with SEN, but like I said I teach over 200 students, I think getting on for 30 of them have various diagnosed SEN, then other have got other issues that need monitoring. Realistically I will remember he has ASD. I'll probably forget to check he has noted his homework down at some point. Prompting him to go to the toilet at break (the timetable suggestion is good) is more realistic than expecting every teacher to let him go to the toilet as and when required (even if class teachers know, there will be cover lessons and so on).

Contact with the school to remind teachers of his issues will help, but getting him into routines which will anticipate and head off issues will also be key. Definitely organise his timetable (some students have a visual one) and attach it to his bag so he can't easily lose it, and have copies stashed elsewhere. Plan out his breaks and lunch too. If he doesn't want to go to the quiet room can he go to the library? Or can a teacher have a word with the kids who stop him from going there?

Original poster
Verbena37 · 19/09/2016 23:07

Thanks all.
I'm not sure what the special room is called. They might have told e but I can't remember. It his a numbered room and theyctend to call it that I think.

DS is not funded I don't think but he has been assigned a key worker......but because of how he is, he doesn't want her going to him or asking him things. We have therefore decided that her input will only be if it's needed via me. So if DS has an issue, he will tell me, as he normally does, then I'll tell her if need be.

I guess what I'm wanting for him is an understanding if the anxiety he has when trying to conform like other children. He won't speak up for himself normally and when he did, last week, the teacher said he couldn't pop to the loo because it had only just been break. He had missed going to the loo atbreak because he wanted a snack and then didn't realise how much time there was left for break. He can tell the time but doesn't really have much concept of it. His teachers don't get that I don't think. It wasn't him purposely not bothering to use the loo. he eats so selectively that if he didn't have a snack at break, he wouldn't be able to concentrate so in his mind, queuing for a snack the main mission at break. He won't take one from home.

I will try to add loo break symbols in his diary so nobody else knows what they mean.
These things might seem so trivial to non ASD parents but for us, when his anxiety is usually at about 80% most of the time, the little things really make a difference.

OP posts:
Dollykazaver · 19/09/2016 22:56

"only give extra dispensation with physical disabilities"

Holy fuckballs!!! Please please email them NOW and tell them they need to give even a cursory glance to the Equality Act and the SEN COP. Christ that's shocked me!

cheekymonk · 19/09/2016 22:31

Am having similar issues myself verbena, my DS has also just started yr 7. I too had meeting with senco last term but was not sure what to expect/do even this term. DS was very positive in first week and blew me away with how well he seemed to cope. His tutor rang home (made contact with all parents I think ) saying he had left school bag in hall on first day but that his organisational skills had improved since then. I emailed senco last week as DS complained of being hot/uncomfortable and struggling to rush between lessons. Apparently though no extra time can be given as they 'only give extra dispensation with physical disabilities' HmmToday DS got2 penalty points for being late for a lesson and taking in wrong book. He said he had to try really hard not to cry at school. It's frustrating to say the least...

Dollykazaver · 19/09/2016 22:30

That sounds terribly hard going for him OP. Do you have any other options? Different schools? Home Ed?

troutsprout · 19/09/2016 22:27

Does he have a planner? You could write in his lessons for the day and also write a loo prompt in it?.
Do the school use any other systems to check homework together like 'show my homework'?
Schools quite often have a homework timetable.. you could ask for that
It's still early days.. with a lot to take on board. I hope he gets into swing of it soon. Smile

AstronautMikeDexter · 19/09/2016 22:22

Also - the 'special room' is not a great term! Does the school have a name for this? If they don't, surely that's a task for the SEN dept to rebrand.

AstronautMikeDexter · 19/09/2016 22:20

Hi Verbena

My last role before mat leave was as a TA in the SEN dept in a large mainstream secondary school.

I have a few questions: Does your DS have any funding? Have the school assigned him a key worker? Has the SENCo created a care plan for him? What has your contact with the school been like?

In my old school even the higher functioning students were known to staff and had a key worker who was able to work with the other teachers (not necessarily accompanying them to lessons, but a 'named person' iyswim).

We would be the first line of communication for parents, tutors, teachers etc. Some teachers were better than others when it came to recognising the needs of SEND students...I think that's just how things go unfortunately.

When you say 'organising his time' what does that look like to you? What type of help does he need?

My advice would be to keep on at the school and continue to ask questions about his progress, what's being provided for him...can you meet with the year head, tutor as well? Could you create 'Pen portraits' with them that could be emailed/given to his teachers? The parents who were persistent and present (without being a pita) had the kids that were helped most.

Unfortunate that you should have to push so hard but with everything and everyone being so stretched, this was what worked in my school. It's easy for kids to lost if they're quiet and no one is advocating for them.

Original poster
Verbena37 · 19/09/2016 21:57

noblegiraffe obviously we want him to become independent and he is quite independent. What I really want is for his teachers (all of his subject teachers) to remember and understand his issues and why he might be different and need a different kind of support than the other children in the class (and yes, I realise there will be others who also have SEN).
From the way you posted though, I do think that mainstream secondary staff do (sadly understandably) perhaps aren't as supportive to students with SEN as they might be with more specialist training.

For many children with HF ASD, simply helping him to be more independent isn't the easiest of things and never will be. For example, he wants to sit with his friends but he can't be anywhere near the smell of juice so he sits and becomes more and more anxious or becsaue he might not have needed the loo at break time, when asking to use it at the start of a lesson and being declined, he then holds it for the next two hours.....in pain and having little leaks and feeling humiliated.

For many HF ASD children, just the noise of the playgorund and canteen is too much. They've said he can use the special room but his friends shout out "are you going to the special room" if anybody goes there.

Insan 1 thank you. Yes, adding to his timetable might help actually. I might redo it as it's all scrunched up in the base of his bag.

OP posts:
insan1tyscartching · 19/09/2016 21:17

It is really tough the difference between Primary and Secondary dd struggled and she has TA support because of her statement. Can you add to his timetable so that he knows the at first break he needs to use the toilet and then at lunchtime he goes to canteen then toilet and then club/library/playground?

noblegiraffe · 19/09/2016 21:03

I teach over 200 kids a week, so realistically I'm going to forget stuff about individual kids.

What do you mean by organising his time? Who do you want to tell him to go to the toilet? What do you want done about writing down homework?

The best thing would be to get systems in place so that he can become more independent and do these things for himself.

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