ASD in mainstream secondary

Flying a keyworker in dd's school would be the TA who was assigned with the majority of child's hours of support or (if a child didn't have allocated support hours through a statement or EHCP) would be a person usually through the pastoral support team who would have a weekly/fortnightly session with the child so as they would have a named person they could confide in. Dd's keyworker would attend statement reviews/IEP meetings or parent's updates.
Three TAs in a school of a 1000 doesn't sound right to me there were over 30 in dd's primary a school with less than 400 pupils. How are statement and EHCP support hours covered? Even with only 1% of students with a statement 3 TA's couldn't cover 10 students.

I think ds's school has 3 TAs for a school of about 1000.

I do think that mainstream secondary staff do (sadly understandably) perhaps aren't as supportive to students with SEN as they might be with more specialist training.
It's not lack of training, it's time and sheer number of students.

What's a keyworker in this context? Who should have one?

Princess then TA support should be allocated in such a way that best suits the needs of the child. Dd's TAs do half her lessons each, that way they have a chance of building a relationship with her and dd stands a chance of them building some sort of understanding of her needs.
Tbh the vast majority of support dd receives is inadequate, the TA's have limited understanding, the training they receive is basic and dd's TA's are the ones I chose from a pathetic bunch. Dd's key TA is the "specialist" ASD TA , she has no specialist knowledge, she still hasn't grasped the difference between a physiologist and a psychologist but she's supposedly the best they have got.
Our children are constantly short changed, often saddled with TA's that are more a hindrance than a help which removes them from the direct support and teaching of the teacher who will at least have a teaching qualification.

Yes I'll agree that SEN staff don't have enough training which comes down to funding again. BUT even when you have funding and have been on training unless you are a 1:1 you simply don't have time to try and work out strategies and adapt them when you only see a child a couple of hours a fortnight and you often end up back at step 1 each lesson which is frustrating.

There are lots of advantages of secondary over primary, though. Just the fact that teachers see so many more pupils means that they are much more likely to have come into contact with someone similar to your dc before.

Also, there's likely to be a dedicated SENCO - as opposed to the situation in dd's primary where the HT was the SENCO, and said to us on one occasion that she'd never had a pupil on the SEN & high ability lists before (and she was just a couple of years off retirement, so not new to the profession).

And realistically, while some teachers will be sympathetic and others not so much, at least you aren't stuck with the latter every lesson for 2 years!

I am a secondary teacher of a non-core subject and I see KS3 classes once a week at my school we also received ASD training every other year.

With currently 4 year 8 and 3 year 7 classes that's close to 210 children I see for 50 minutes a week. Of these, I get forwarded the information and emails sent out by the SENCO with regards to specific issues for reminder but at the moment I can't even recall my year 7s (and a lot of the year 8s as I didn't teach them last year) unless I have their seating plan with photos in front of me.
As others have stated each child will have their own particular needs - my DS for instance has his set of needs whereas his friend has another set of needs but both are ASD

As Noble has pointed out there are of course going to be times that we end up just being human rather than a machine and yes, we will forget on occasion if a student who needs to be able to go to the toilet, have their homework written in their planners for them therefore as pointed out reminder cards etc are very helpful.

Like PP have pointed out, secondary with the number of teachers/students is vastly different from primary in terms of the personal feel and therefore the form tutor/senco/key worker is the point of contact and if there are issues they are the ones to discuss it with and they will forward the information.

In terms of the toilets; yes long ago there might not have been issues, but as other teachers have said in this day of age there are. I am not allowed to just go the toilet when I please as per workers in countless professions; the human right argument is not applicable to this situation as there are toilets available for students at the times when it is appropriate unless there is a specific need (see earlier about cards). It is also school policy to not allow students to go the toilet unless it is an emergency or they have a pass.

We can never be perfect to every child we teach, we can never be perfect to every child in our care; but neither are parents, doctors, support workers as at the end of the day but we try our hardest to be there 100% for every child we teach for both their academic achievement and their personal lives.

I had all this too in Y7 and it was a disaster. DS basically floundered and nothing got done which was promised. At the end of Y7 I pulled DS from school following a blazing row with the HT (who was an arrogant pig of a man) and fought tooth and nail to get DS moved to a special school. His grades and learning difficulties were enough to get him moved. Best decision I ever made.
Tellingly the mainstream school in question couldn't see what the problem was.

If your child is academically on a par with his peers it is much more of an issue because whether the Govt decides to acknowledge this or not there is a MASSIVE gap in provision for children at the upper end of the spectrum who struggle with mainstream school but do not meet the criteria for a special school because academically they are deemed too able. To give an idea of "academically able" the LEA deemed my son (level 2 in English and Level 3 in Maths at end of Y7) as "academically able".
I would have laughed if it wasn't so outrageous.

Keep on and on at the SENCO as you know your child better than they do. Too many SEN staff have bugger all experience of autism and adopt a "one size fits all" approach.

Having said all that, schools can't win. DD's school has an exceptionally high %ge of SEN and particularly dyslexic pupils because it has the reputation for being sympathetic (I think 44% entered the school with a reading age below 9 years at the last stats I saw, and anecdotally there are an awful lot like dd with borderline / undiagnosed other issues). Unsurprisingly, that means it's results aren't as good as others, and then it gets judged on that, when actually a lot of the dc are doing really well in the circumstances :(

This thread is really interesting, and makes me feel very lucky with dd's school, even though things aren't perfect.

She's had ongoing issues, cause unknown but she's been referred for ASD assessment (realistically the waiting list in our county is so long she's likely to have left school before reaching the top of it) - and the ed psych while obviously not in a place to diagnose basically said 'lots of aspergers traits'.

Very much like your ds, dd gets very very anxious, and also finds it pretty much impossible to ask for help, particularly when she gets in a state. So for example sensory overload in a music lesson doing percussion would be a typical problem that might occur. The teacher would be happy for her to leave the lesson and work quietly in her office, but dd can't express this at the point when she has the need.

DD's form tutor and head of year are our main contacts. I've found very often that if we can come up with a suggested solution (like your idea of a pass for your DS's toilet issue), then school are only too happy to give it really serious consideration.

Longer term - but I've also found it very helpful to build relationships with sympathetic teachers. So for example one science teacher istruggles with DD's tendency to fidget and look out of the window - talking to the head of science got her moved from the front to the back of the classroom in the seating plan so that she wasn't in direct line of sight, and everyone was happier.

The other thing that (slightly cynically) I think makes a difference, is that if dd gets in too much of a state, we sometimes can't realistically get her to be / stay in school. I don't think it's right, but schools are judged very strongly on attendance, and are IME very keen to make adjustments that will keep a child's %ge attendance up.

As a parent of a son with Aspergers, I find it worrying just how different he is treated by different teachers - luckily he only has a few minor issues. Some teachers are really supportive and will be flexible to deal with his problem areas. Yet others just seem to plough on regardless and almost seem to do things deliberately to cause problems for him. What I can't understand is why some teachers can be flexible yet others can't - surely they're all under pressure, working long hours, etc., so I think it still comes down to some who are just being obstructive or unsympathetic just for the sake of it!

One problem with autism is that it manifests itself in so many different ways in children. I've had some autism training and it was only useful in a very general sense. I've taught lots of different children with autism and they've all been different. Some bright, some less academic, some explode, some withdraw into themselves, some actually are quite happy and settled, some suffer major problems and struggle to come to school. Telling a teacher that a student is autistic doesn't tell them much at all.

My ds's school's SEN policy reads like a joke. If they did what it says it would be the perfect school for all children including ds, however either:

1/ They think they think they are achieving what they say re SEN, in which case they are severely deluded and failing many families because actually they're not. Sadly surely this can be the only option, others being:

2/ They are aware they are not achieving due to the multi reasons already listed: complete lack of awareness from some teachers regarding ASD including from Sencos, with some appearing to even refuse to acknowledge it exists (kids should just do this, understand that etc,) lack of funding, mis-direction of funding, poor use of other resources such as TAs, simple equipment. Not all staff are useless. Some are really clued up and helpful but can be few and far-between and totally overstretched. I get the feeling, due to culture of school, that if these fabulous sorts shout to loudly it will not go well for them (Many parents of children with SEN know this feeling well themselves.} If they are aware, then they are lying in their policies. Why can't they admit that they are failing and do something to remedy it?

3/ I could be completely wrong. DS has no problems and everything in his garden of school life is rosey. If this is the case, why the aforementioned parents evenings, countless negative reports etc etc etc.

FFS HAVING AUTISM CAN BE SHIT ENOUGH. ONCE IT'S ACTUALLY DIAGNOSED WHY, OH WHY, DO THE PROBLEMS REALLY BEGIN?? WE SHOULD NOT BE FAILING THESE, WHAT IS IT? 1%? OF OUR CHILDREN?

Op dd ask her teacher if she can use the toilet and has her pass visible whilst asking. ( it's a blue credit card size laminated pass) Also if a member of staff sees her in the corridor during class and asks where she is going she shows the pass.
The teachers are not supposed to question dc with passes and to always let them go.

verbena if your DH had to deal with suicide of staff then perhaps there were failings in his organisation too.

Things are only going to get worse with more budget cuts I'm afraid. I'm not saying that teachers or school staff deliberately fail students, but don't assume that your DS is going to be perfectly dealt with at every single turn, help his planning for dealing with those situations, come up with routines to help him and see what systems the school can put in place. Yes, ask for an email to go around his teachers reminding them of his needs but also remember cover lessons happen and teachers change so teacher awareness of fine details can't be guaranteed.

Your poor ds, Verbena.

I have a dc with ASD in a mainstream private secondary school and my experience has been totally different (thankfully). The teachers are all aware of the issues and my dc does get allowances for disorganisation and other issues. The staff have focussed on the particular problems my dc faces with learning, particularly when it comes to exams, and I can call the SENCO/tutor at any point. It's terrible that children in the state system are being failed in the way that Verbena's ds and many others are.

I'm pretty sure that even for your DH not every single interaction with every single person in his care was 100% perfect all the time. Hell, we don't even manage it with our own kids, do we? And there's far fewer of them, and we know them way better.

Noble I have no gripes with dd's subject teachers in fact some of them show far more understanding and have a better grasp of inclusion than the SENCo who you would assume would be clued up.
I don't think mainstream secondaries are set up to help a child with ASD succeed. There are so many challenges each and every day because of the vast number of staff and pupils the child comes into contact with who all have their own rules and methods.
Yes there are individual teachers, maybe like yourself, who support, make allowances, are prepared to make adjustments but it only takes one lesson with maybe a relief staff member, a disruptive child, a fire alarm, an enhancement activity or quite frankly a teacher unable or unwilling to be helpful to throw a child's ability to cope out of the window.

Shrugging your shoulders and saying "it's all to hard"

To illustrate, yesterday I had a meeting before school, I taught a full 5 hours of lessons and I had a meeting after school. I gave up my lunchtime to mentor a sixth form lad with ASD, who I don't think would still be in school if it wasn't for my support. I had a long discussion with a girl who is struggling with her mental health. I followed that up with an email to the pastoral head suggesting that I give up some free periods to support her. I emailed a support assistant with some details of catch-up tutoring for a student with ADHD that I had arranged. And I flagged up some fresh self harm wounds I spotted with the CP officer. Then I did a shed load of planning and marking.

So if, in that time I told off your DS for being late to a lesson, it's not because I don't care, it's because I'm only human.