What benefit would private education give my DD?

We had a very capable girl in a supposedly nurturing and academic indie that goes from 5-18. She is delighted she has left. The reasons are numerous, mostly academic. DD is very much looking forward to attending state school from September. We are looking forward to being able to finally do work on our home beyond emergency repairs. So OP I mention this as the grass can often seem greener whichever side you are on.

There are lots of things to look at. Firstly, if the "connections" issue feels morally wrong to you, then I really think you do need to think twice. It is what many people want from an expensive education. I can say my DD has benefitted immensely from connections she has made, but it has not been via her individual school. I am delighted because we have no connections whatsoever! Yes, the boys' school networks are stronger but the girls can tap in! In the future, as more girls break into politics, the City, Law, etc girls' schools will become more effective at this. Going to a top independent school also tends to colour who your friends and networking buddies will be through university and beyond. It is often these people, and their parents, who help you out.

You definitely cannot say a bright child will necesarily do better in an independent school. I also feel that some independent schools do want a certain type of conformist child and ones that stand out from the crowd are less well accommodated than you might imagine. Some schools have a certain "type" of child that fits their model. You need to ascertain if a child who pushes herself forward is the type for a nurturing school. She may need a school that allows her personality to flourish but encourages a more collaborative approach to learning.

I always think there is a worry when one child want something that will cause the family to have less disposable income than it otherwise would have had. Although your DS is not interested, at the moment, who is to say he will not add up the sums you have spent on DD in the future and wonder why he did not have £X spent on him. He may not, as a very young person, have wanted it, but he may in 10 years time, be less generous towards you. Did you ever take him to look round an independent school when he was 10 years old? Or do you just favour the child who, by the sound of it, is very up-front with her opinions and lets you know exactly what she wants? Are you happy that the family will have to scrimp and save and that will inevitably further impinge on your DS? What will you say to him now and in the future when he cannot have something or when you have insufficient funds to pay for a school trip for him or his university top-up living costs? I would not be putting myself in your position and I think I would look to move for A levels only - and offer this opportunity to both your children.

If the state school has a good 6th form, you are in a very good position. University entrance is about results and applying for the best university you can get into. Independent schools are good at that, but you really can do the university research yourself and the private school may not have any advantage over a very good state school. You can aim high from whatever school she goes to so long as the teaching and results are good. I would treat them equally, save the money you would have spent, and spend it fairly on both your children, not just the one who is asking for it.

I think the 'connections' side of it is reserved for a certain cadre of private school & (dare I say it), boys more than girls. Frankly, the Old Girls' Network, such as it is, at DDs' school certainly wouldn't give either of them a head start over anyone else (NOT, that I was ever looking for this, I stress) - so if I had deemed this a criteria, I'd have seriously wasted my money. I do recognise though, that networking connections exist & again, it's school-dependent.

Yes, I agree the above post. It will depend on the individual school. One of my friend's son went to a good state secondary school with bad history(the school improved a lot over the last few years). He is really good at math, he had great support from his math teacher, took the A level math in Y11, had a very good score in math Olympiad. And he is going to Cambridge this September.

My DS1 is very good at math as well, he enjoyed his private school education very much, however, I don't think he had any additional support. He hasn't been given much extra challenge. I feel his school are good at push all the children to do well, but don't push the most bright ones.

So , don't just think private education is good for your DD, think about the difference of the 2 individual school , which one will be better for your DD.

It really depends on the individual schools you'd be comparing.

There is no valid state versus private comparison - all state schools are different, all private schools are different.

Some schools are better than others for bright motivated kids whether private or state. Some schools, private and state, have different emphasis on sport - eg a private school or a state school may be heavily sport-orientating which may disadvantage a bright but non sporty child.

A quiet/shy/sensitive child may be more prone to bullying if the school, although good academically, isn't good at stamping out bullying. If the child is very bright and top of the class, again, may be prone to bullying if everyone else in the class is more average. Such a child may be better in a more academic setting where there are lots more like them so they don't stand out.

So, no easy answers. You really have to look at the school. But don't think going private is the answer to all the potential problems, it often isn't.

I think it will depend on the individual private school. However, I don't think the benefit you get will be worth the money.

If your DD is well motivated and bright, and the secondary school is good, she should be able to do well. You can spend some money on some tutoring, outside school activities etc. And You can also use the saved money for DC's University fee.

We send DS1 to private school as we don't have a good state secondary school, but we will move him to a good state six form.

When you say your DD has always expressed a desire to go - does this mean you have a particular school in mind, offering a demonstrably better day to day experience and outcome?

The alumni support and networking opportunities - most private schools will have very established and often global organisations which provide contacts and mentoring. It's the 'old school tie' thing, which can be very useful for getting a foot in the door for certain careers

Depends entirely on which state & which independent school you're comparing, TBH. Look at the results & even more importantly, leaver destinations - this is a good starting point. If money's going to be tight, the case for moving to private will have to compelling - and without knowing the schools involved, you could be bitterly disappointed. I have 2 in a very competitive independent & they're both doing just great BUT the class sizes are 26/27+ 'til GCSE. Extra-curricular is great, no question, but in all honesty, you can pursue interests outside. We don't have a decent state alternative, so we've been happy to shell out - but if we did?......... I'd be wary of any school branding itself as academically selective, to have spaces for Yr 7 now, so you've got time to see how things pan out. My hunch will be that your DD will thrive at her new school & won't want to move! Good luck !

As your child has just finished Y6 you are too late for Y7 entry, but some independent schools take pupils at Y9 and it could also be possible to transfer for sixth form. I wouldn't worry too much though as good comps cater well for bright pupils.