Hello, long story, but I am mother of B/G twins who started secondary school last Sept. The start was complicated by DS being v ill for the first week and a half, and DD made friends, then seemed to lose them once DS arrived at school. She still has not managed to fit in anywhere, not eating lunch because she won't go to the canteen, won't join clubs, won't do sports. She has gone from a confident, social, sporty girl to a hunch-shouldered, shy, sad person who seems to hate herself and says that she doesn't deserve attention and recently is saying that death would be her best option as she is sad and fat and ugly.
DD is of course not any of the above, apart from sad, and very lonely. If I could have one wish in life at the moment, it would be that just one person would say to DD, come and sit with us for lunch. She only needs one friend.
I have had lots of contact with school, and she is seeing the school psychologist, but the psychologist is leaving at the end of this term, and may not be replaced due to cuts in the budget. I am so worried about DD, I feel like I am caught between trying to support her, but not over-react to her lowest moments, and trying to make her come out of herself and do things which will help, like exercise, see her primary friends, draw and write. I spoke to the psychologist today for the first time, and although she isn't 'allowed' to talk about her sessions with DD, she did let a lot of things into the conversation. Like the pastoral team is currently 'fractured'.
Psychologist is having a meeting with the head of pastoral and the head of year about DD on Wednesday, and I have asked to be there, Psych says I have to have DD's consent as they will be discussing stuff from their sessions. It seems odd that I have to have my DD's approval to attend, but the other staff members don't.
Anyone else out there who has gone through this - and not a half-term, or a term into secondary school? Please don't say, join a club, or get involved in sports. How do you lift a DD in this situation?