Assisted places at private school

I went to a boarding school that was super selective. They had assistance for those who couldn't afford the amounts the assisted places scheme didn't cover as the school didn't want to bankrupt the parents or take away resources from the other children.

Call the bursar and speak to them. The first thing I would do is have them waive the fees to apply. Also, Monmouth is a good school in terms of assistance BUT it isn't the best academically. I would be looking at the super selective boys schools such as Eton, Harrow and Winchester. They start at 13 so I would be speaking to them about planning how to ready him for their entrance exams.

I once listened to a bursar talk at a school open day he said he wasn't against a cheap annual holiday every year, after all he wasn't trying to kill the parents off, reliable new(ish) average family cars, or some equity in an average property, realistically very common when property prices are going up, paying into a pension/life insurance he thought was perfectly acceptable and in fact should be encouraged. But he said he struggled when parents turned up in brand new range rovers, tanned from a recent holiday to an exotic location, with skiing holiday booked in the winter, two homes one with 8 bedrooms and then asked for financial help because they were struggling to pay the fees. Apparently it wasn't uncommon.

But Lurked, there are certainly people who earn within £18-£55k and who could NOT afford independent school, even if they scaled back and received a modest bursary. For many the sums still won't add up.
So, going back to our friends who would have had to find £6k for fees - the £43k they earned was spent each year - not on luxuries, but paying the rent on their 3 bedroomed house in the south-east (would be in the region of £1.8k per month - nothing luxurious or large, or in a flashy area - just a small 3 bed terrace, with 2 of the kids sharing a bedroom) their bills, and food etc. They had one camping type holiday in the UK per year. Both worked. I guess they could have 'scaled back' and cut out their camping trip and yes it might have been possible to save a few hundred.....but not £6k......and of course there were the other children to think about too.

I am not saying that the school was required to offer them more or enough for them to afford the fees. After they had applied and received their bursary offer, they were in the same position as most other people - they simply couldn't afford independent education, even if they cut everything back.

My point is that websites and Bursars don't always make clear how small. Bursary may well be in reality. People see the mention of 100% bursary and think they might get one. Many people cannot afford much towards fees ....yes,they could cut back a bit and contribute something (and many people are willing to make huge sacrifices) but these are often not enough. They still can't afford it.

I do agree though, that there are also lots of people who have have household incomes which are above the average, and who live reasonably comfortable lives, and fancy the idea of an independent education. Some of those have an adult who stays at home,who could be in work, or have holidays etc etc and don't really want to change their lifestyle, but fancy a handout towards fees. I agree that those on bursaries should be expected to make cut-backs. It is why most bursary policies list things which would not be considered acceptable for those in receipt of bursaries; frequent new cars, frequent holidays or holidays abroad, second home ownership, significant home improvements. Bursary policies also usually say that both adults would be expected to work and equity within property to be freed up to contribute towards fees. This all seems correct - a bursary isn't a subsidy for a middle class lifestyle. Lots of people who pay full fees go without those luxuries to pay the fees,many so should those who want financial help. However, even once all those things have been removed and cut-backs have been made,even to the bone, many will find a bursary is still insufficient to allow them to afford to attend.

I think you should go for it and see, nothing ventured nothing gained.
What was important to us was that the ethos of the statements about financial support and access to all were carried throughout the school.

It's a waste of time a school offering 100% bursaries to support those who are less well off if they have expensive excursions, uniform you need a second mortgage for, kids with everything their little hearts desire, and lots of rich people who look down their noses at you.
Not that I think all rich people do this, of course they don't.

We were very pleasantly surprised and it has worked out well for us and dd is about to start her second term now.
The school is one on it's own so not really comparable but I write as a parent who went for the financial support, with a lower family income than yourselves and it worked.

No I don't not month in month out.
We're not mega wealthy compared to many of the parents at DS2's school, we pay fees out of our monthly income, we've been doing this now for at least 12 years the end is now in site we've only two more terms to go, (crack open the bottle of champagne smiley). Its our choice and I ask for no sympathy but at times it's been a bloody struggle and an emotional drain on us as well as a financial one, mortgage school fees council tax life insurance petrol (we too are rural) are the same amount month in month out you can't reduce them one month if the unexpected comes in, also all for us have equal priority that's our choice. It'll will be a relief when it's all over. It's also the unexpected bills that cause the trouble, dentists, a broken appliance e.g.washing machine/boiler, a vets bill or a broken down car or even better all four in the same month and we have have lots more left over than that after we've paid the fees.
IMO opinion in your position you have to absolutely believe 100%
that it's money well spent. It doesn't actually matter if other people think your nuts paying for education, it's what you think that matters and you must get what your paying for whether it be a golf course, an Olympic rowing lake, smaller classes, or a large non examined curriculum. As soon as you stop believing yoir getting what ever it is then suddenly it becomes a real burden. I also have to say that paying doesn't always mean better, that schools can say anything on their websites/open days, that better exam results aren't guaranteed, neither is better teaching or better behaved pupils and and that Im not completely convinced that smaller classes are the be all and end all. No where, even a certain school off the M4 is perfect, and that at every school however good there will be children who are not thriving, and there will be schools that many consider to be undesirable where children are thriving.
For me super bright children need to be mentally challenged in lessons on a daily basis, be educated with others like themselves but also I think they need a very broad intellectually challenging curriculum. IMO the super selective are in the best position to do this and so we come back to my point about for us it's money well spent.

Op- as gruach said it's really the bursar you need to speak to. I applied for bursaries for dd, and in each case they took everything into account, from an allowance to provide for any other children, to rent and assets.

wombat my point entirely. They can afford it if it is what they truly want. Lots of people live on 18-20k a year, thus if private school is truly a priority, there is no reason higher earners can't scale themselves back and live on that too. They may not want private school enough to be willing to, but that doesn't mean the bursary system is at fault.

Lurked, I was just reporting on the experiences I have heard from a number of people - they were exactly as I said - they explained their financial position to the bursar and were encouraged to apply, but in all cases, the bursary offered wasn't sufficient to allow them to go.

Brie....it may well be that your income after fees wouldn't be enough to live on. That is the situation that most people find themselves in and why they don't attend independent schools.

Schools offering bursaries do look at income levels and offer on a sliding scale. However, that sliding scale doesn't mean it will be affordable for all who fall within the bursary income range. Schools do want to offer bursaries, but as has been said, the demands on the pot are so high they can't make it affordable for all who pass the exam, only a bit more within reach. And for most, a bit more within reach still means it is out of reach.

To give an example of one of the families I was referring to, they had an income of £43k and had 3 children. The school fees would have been £12k and they were offered a 50% bursary, after they told the school the original 35% offered simply wasn't enough. 50% was a generous bursary offer....but they couldn't afford £6k and in fact couldn't have paid any more than £600. The school couldn't offer more, so the boy went to the state school and is doing well.

My point is simply that most schools won't give bursaries of a big enough % to people to make the fees affordable, unless their incomes are below that ££18k level mentioned earlier.....and most will only be able to afford perhaps 1 bursary on that scale. It is when your income is somewhere between that £18k and whatever the upper limit is (around £55k round here) that people often find they can get some kind of bursary offer, but it isn't enough because they would still need to cover more than they can afford.

Op, you've got a school in mind? Surely you need to ask them not Mumsnet?

Brie ... Why do you feel you have to break down your income and outgoings for the benefit of MN? Even if someone on this thread is the actual Bursar of the actual school they will still need to see your completed application form and submit the details to the rest of the people who make the decisions. And consider how much they want your particular child. In other words - none of our opinions will have any bearing on what happens between you and any given school.

If you are (forgive me) this sensitive and easily roused here I worry that you may find the application process incredibly stressful.

Excellently put Lurked (I would probably have added lots of italics and bolding to your first paragraph).

I disagree wombat. Bursaries are offered in line with your income, meaning if you need to pay a top up, then you can actually afford the rest of the fees if it's a priority. A lot of full fee payers sacrifice in other areas to pay, and it's only fair those receiving a bursary should be willing to do the same. And more importantly, bursaries are there to support children who couldn't otherwise attend, not to make sure Mr and Mrs above national average income don't need to budget for school fees.

The only other consideration is that the bursary pot only goes so far, thus while the school may well agree your child is entitled to x% bursary, by the time they get to your child their may only be y% or even nothing left in the pot. The amount of bursary you get is means tested, but there are always far more applicants than money, so invariably not everyone entitled will get one.

Smaller and less wealthy schools may well deliberately try and split any bursary pot up to get as many places filled as possible, but the popular/ well known/ wealthy etc independents don't need to pursue that tactic.

I'm afraid to say I have known a number of people in a similar position who have been disappointed;

• saw website offering bursaries to those with an income that theirs fell within
• contacted bursar and had chat and were strongly encouraged to apply, with suggestion that generous bursaries would be available
• took exam and were offered place with bursary......but bursary not sufficient to make it doable......big disappointment and a feeling of having been a bit misled. Peeved too due to incurring application costs and probably preparation materials costs,which could have been avoided if true picture had been clearer,

As others have said, I think that bursaries (which absolutely will be means tested and on a sliding scale......so if your income is near the upper limit, you really will only get a small offer) only make expensive independents affordable if,
A. your income is below the lower limit meaning you could gain a 100% bursary
B. Your can afford most of the fees yourself and just need a small top up.

Unfortunately many people find their income is too high to qualify for enough to make it viable for their family.
Some people find that family members will pay enough to make up the difference, but many people aren't in this position.

I don't want to deter the OP, and if her child is extremely clever, he may gain a substantial scholarship (purely on academic ability and not related to means) but I think it is important to be realistic about the amount of bursary money which is likely.

Definitely ring the bursar. Ask some very specific questions and be clear with the bursar that you need as much specific information as possible, to avoid you wasting everyone's time,raising the hopes of your son, and also incurring application costs.

• what would be the typical bursary offer for someone earning £40k?
• how often is a full or 80% (or whatever amount would be needed) given?
• are bursaries sometimes divided amongst families?
• if only a tiny bursary were offered, what is the maximum remission which can be achieved via scholarship.

The only way to find out is for op to contact the bursar. Of course they won't give a detailed answer on how much help you get until you've applied, but ime they will give a rough outline of how they calculate it. Also given they have assisted, bursary and scholarship it's worth a chat to find out which would be most suitable, or if they can be combined.

Call it an educated guess Clavinova. Agree it's worth a try, but also agree with pp that it's not worth relying on to cover, or all but cover, the fees.

You are only 'guessing' though Molio. The website also states that the school offers a wide range of scholarships and bursaries to 'talented boys from many different backgrounds' - so presumably those boys with scholarships and bursaries have to do well in the entrance exam or have other talents in sport, music etc.
Please apply op - you live nearby and you have nothing to lose.

My guess would be that although the OP doesn't have capital assets the fact that she has a joint income of £40k with the cut off for assisted places being £43k would mean that any assistance given would be of a minimal amount. It explicitly states that financial need, not academic merit, is the criterion in making an award. They're a bit more cagey about their bursaries but it seems to me that £40k is too close to the cut off for assisted places to reasonably expect a significant sum. £40k is a comfortable income. I agree with Kuppenbender - don't get your hopes up, let alone the hopes of your DS.

The income threshold for an assisted place at Monmouth has risen to £43,000 for 2015/6.

www.monmouthschool.org/admissions/bursaries-assisted-places/

The main problem would be preparing your DS (and yourself) for the disappointment of being offered a place but a laughably insufficient bursary, or worse, an almost but not quite enough bursary.

By all means get your DS motivated to prepare for the entrance test, but don't overdo it. Play down your concerns about the state option to your DS.

Here, hopefully, (click on bursaries/assisted places it seems to give more details than the other tabs with the same title) Monmouth gives guildlines for bursaries/assisted places it appears an income in excess of approximately 38k means your unlikely to get much although it's not clear if this is from the "assisted place scheme" or their bursary pot they don't appear to be one and the same.
I would suggest you also think about a scholarship with an attached bursary, and do at the very least consider boarding it can work for those on the autistic spectrum although not in all cases and more importantly two schools with generous bursary funds here and here are of course both full boarding the latter has a reputation for taking quirky boys some who will be somewhere on the autistic spectrum.
OP I know you said you've boarded yourself but boarding has changed significantly.
I agree with Bertrum do also look at the state sector don't assume that paying has to always mean better results and good pastoral care/individual care and attention every time.

I think as far as boarding and 100% fee reduction go you need to be either extremely confident your child will be the type that loves it, or have little other choice. Purely because if the boarding doesn't suit them, you can't just easily pick up a bursary for a day school.

I think what a child needs at 13 is not quite the same as age 8. Usually boarding schools have all types of children. Quiet and loud! They all mix. However, working on social skills may be priority.

DS wouldn't cope with boarding school, he has social issues (lots of aspergers traits but not quite enough for a statement) so although can cope with mainstream school etc does need solitude and quiet which he wouldn't get at boarding school (I boarded from age 15)

IMHO I think you should look at a school from what it will do to increase his social skills, academic ability and no social skills do not make for a happy adult life.

New Year's resolution Bert?

Well done.