Right. Tell me what to do here- key words- 11+, g&t, University, widening access......

Out of interest op, what would you say to your DS about turning down the place on the trip? In turn, what message would this send to him, and what will he say to his classmates about it?

Are you deliberately misunderstanding me? I would not expect him to give up his place in a team to a less able child if he was fairly selected.

He was fairly selected for this trip. So no, not deliberately misunderstanding, or trying to be antagonistic. Just trying to show a different take on it.

True.

TheWordFactory. There may be 10 on this trip and 10 more in year 10 to a different university!!! This may not be the only trip. It is just the one the OP knows about!!!

No , I don't think the way I have talked about your son is unacceptable! You have dished it out back in return and it was you who said he would rather do PE. I have merely suggested that your DS might be better advised not to go if he would rather go to his PE lesson. I have not sworn, used offensive language or been aggressive. I have stated my opinion and so have many others who, although you don't like it, tend to support the argument that he should go. I now think differently. Please do try and find a fully deserving child to go in his place. Every day, when I read posts like this, I am so glad I am not a teacher just trying to do my best for all the children in the school! What a thankless task!

I am impressed that posters know the history of this child and the 11 plus!!! What memories! I have no idea about any of this. It is also important to note that having a degree is not the only passport to having a fulfilled life and that some jobs that make you happy do not need a degree.

OP said space limited due to size of minibus although most minibuses take 15 so even with 2 teachers there'd still be room for 3 more kids

I think the OP has stood her ground and I don't think any of the comments are unacceptable. It is not patronising for a child who is enthusiastic about university to encourage others. It happens all the time. The child just does not stand up and announce he or she has higher aspirations and more educated parents than everyone else! It is normal behaviour to start talking about courses and universities among a group of friends. What better place than a trip to a university? However, the op's DS would rather go to his sports lesson. So let him do that if he can't see the wider picture. No harm done.

Find out what the trip is really about. Some uni's offer G&T programmes for children, to give them an extra dimension to their education.

Why only ten?

If they're supposedly pushing hard for widening access?

I stand corrected on the data - although I'm pretty sure its spotted as part of Pupil premium allocations.

FWIW Year 9 is actually too late to encourage Widening Participation.
At the events DH is involved with, KS2 sessions have the greatest impact
as then the kids start secondary with the idea of university already in their heads
so it affects their work long before GCSE options

I think the OP has had a hard time on this thread. Lots of "arrogant" and "patronising" comments that are judgemental, opinionated and, in my opinion, unhelpful. All of the points those posters made could have been made without being judgemental at all.

For what it's worth, if you are concerned that your child won't benefit much by going and that this would be at the expense of someone else that might benefit, talk to the school and the co-ordinator and discuss. Combine this with your child's opinion.

Bertrand I agree with Molio that places may not be limiting so your moral dilemma may be a non issue. Also should he not go what excuse would he be able to say to the other DCs without it being contrived or patronising ?

Just let the kid go if he fancies it. You run a very real risk of looking like a real snob if you decline it on these grounds, however well intentioned you are. I doubt places are that limited anyhow. Also, he might enjoy the day. It does sound over controlling, I agree.

talkin most state schools do not routinely ask for parental education or employment or salary etc.

Certainly the schools I visit most often do not have that sort of profile.
They know post code, FSM, ability ranges.

I did not fill in any information about me or dh on the sixth form form. None of their business!

Ds eliminated himself from the Sutton Trust application based on parental background.

No they don't talkin! The state school my dcs are at does not hold any information about mine or dh's educational background. Your sixth form may ask for it, but don't assume 11-16 schools have that data.

Word
I don't think a school can be expected to know which DC have no one supporting university education and which do.
State schools have exactly that information.
They ask for it at the 6th form college when planning access to trips and days and stuff.
DD has already been turned down for two university events because of DH's and my degrees - even though she has been at comps right through.