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What would you expect done in this situation?

39 replies

Chokingonhollister · 07/07/2015 15:39

Name changed as very specific.

On a trip a couple of weeks ago one of the boys who has a bit of a reputation was winding my Sen dd up on the coach. He was putting his hands through the seats , poking her and saying she had bit him . She definatey hadn't. He then got several of his mates to chant biter at her.
Dd asked to move explaining why and was allowed but the boy was allowed to move behind her again and continued. Dd text me. I told school and he was moved.

Back at school however he has told everyone who wasn't on the trip she bit him. Lots of people are now asking her why she bit him and she's just saying she didnt. However there are several boys calling her Suarez (as in the footballer who bit) now and dd is getting very distressed. She has Sen and is very sensitive and was already really struggling in school. She is year seven.

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Chokingonhollister · 07/07/2015 19:40

I'm not sure about the original boy. He isn't in her Sen room at lunch or any of the Sen groups she is.
There's now a group of boys all calling her.

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YeOldTrout · 07/07/2015 19:33

How likely is it that the boy himself also has SEN?

RandomMess · 07/07/2015 18:47

I am fuming at the school's response tbh, it's disgusting.

Floggingmolly · 07/07/2015 18:26

Tell them if it happens again??? Having failed to deal with it this time?? I second the Police; if only to get the school to take you seriously. That is appalling.

RandomMess · 07/07/2015 17:39

Please call the Police, even if there is nothing they can do about this incident it will be logged so if it continues it will add weight. They know what they are doing is cruel, unkind and wrong and if it's outside of school I doubt the school will get involved in that aspect.

Have you got someone who can go with you? Please make notes especially of when they will do x y z by and how they will escalate if it continues etc.

Chokingonhollister · 07/07/2015 16:54

Thanks I already have a meeting Friday.

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RandomMess · 07/07/2015 16:47

So harassment & intimidation on the way home from school? Call the police, your dd is a vulnerable CHILD and they are above the age of criminal responsibility.

With regards to how shitty the school is being time to make an appointment with the head or another of the leadership team and take in their anti bullying policy with you and ask why they are not following it. Take another adult with you to act as a scribe/to take minutes - ask if you can record it.

Chokingonhollister · 07/07/2015 16:28

Thank you. It is bullying isn't it, I'm not over reacting am I.
I'm pretty cross to be honest. Dd has been bullied most of primary and we thought secondary was going better. Obviously not Sad

I emailed year head who hasn't replied yet and wrote a note to form teacher. Form teacher didn't speak to the named boys but told dd to tell her if it happened again. A different boy did it in school and form teacher told him off. However he and another boy waited after school and carried it on.

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VerityWaves · 07/07/2015 16:24

This is classic bullying. Please report and don't let it go until there has been an apology and acknowledgement ..

RandomMess · 07/07/2015 16:23

This bit covers what happened

Bullying may be defined as the intentional hurting, harming or humiliating of another person
by physical (including sexual), verbal (including via social media sites and SMS messages),
and emotional means (by excluding, tormenting or spreading malicious rumours). It can
involve manipulating a third party to tease to torment someone. It can involve complicity that
falls short of direct participation. Bullying is often hidden and subtle. It can also be overt and
intimidatory.

  1. Bullying may involve actions or comments that are racist, cultural homophobic, which focus
on disabilities or other physical attributes (such as hair colour or body shape). Bullying can happen anywhere and at any time and can cause psychological damage. We always treat it very seriously. It conflicts sharply with the school’s policy on equal opportunities, as well as with its social and moral principles.
RandomMess · 07/07/2015 16:22

Don't know what Anti-Bullying Policy your school has but this one certainly covers this sort of behaviour

www.christs-hospital.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Anti-Bullying-Policy-Feb-15.pdf

noblegiraffe · 07/07/2015 16:21

Report it as bullying (which it is) to the head of year or similar pastoral leader. If you have contact with the SENCO, also discuss it with them to see if they can offer any support.

RandomMess · 07/07/2015 16:19

I would expect the school to haul the boy in and deal with it following their bullying thingy. Including him admitting that he has lied to the peers and a written apology to your dd.

I would also be expecting them to support DD emotionally during the school day.

Chokingonhollister · 07/07/2015 16:16

Anyone? Even if you feel dd should just suck it up?

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