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Original poster

School residential trip dilemma

109 replies

redbeard · 04/07/2015 16:53

Hi, my DD 12 (asd ) was due to go on a 5 day trip on Mon, however , she has been on and off for a few weeks as to whether or not she wanted to go.

I asked her to give me a final answer on Friday , so I could inform school if she wasn't going to go , as they leave early and would be expecting her.

She was adamant she didn't want to go, and so I phoned school to tell them she would not be going.

However now she is upset and want's to go, I have said that it's too late , she made her decision etc, but my question is , will they have cancelled her place ?

I cannot contact anyone, and they leave early , any suggestions anyone?

OP posts:
Original poster
redbeard · 04/07/2015 21:21

Thankyou to those who understand how big a thing this is for my Dd (and me).

It probably is for the best, the worries she had about not having any friends there are somewhat true, her few proper friends she has are not going and I would hate for her to have a bad experience and put her off any future trips .

At the moment she know's if the teachers do not respond she isn't going and understands that she should try to make the right decision at the right time to try to avoid things like this happening again.

OP posts:
CherylBerylMeryl · 04/07/2015 21:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

saintlyjimjams · 04/07/2015 21:15

Cheryl - do you have any students in your class(es) with ASD, because god help them if you do. Do you understand the issues around anxiety and ASD, and how 'big' a residential trip is.

OP - I think it's fine to have emailed. If they don't want to respond they don't have to. I wouldn't just turn up at 5am because if she doesn't go you may end up with a meltdown, and it's just another layer of anxiety. It sounds as if you weren't sure she would cope with this trip anyway, so if it doesn't happen just maybe see it as better to have 'failed' before leaving & going pear shaped while away.

If they do respond and it's decided your dd will go, stick to your guns with her and make sure she knows another change of mind is out of the question.

Original poster
redbeard · 04/07/2015 21:13

Hi, she's is going with 2 teachers who know her really well , plus a ta and 2 others going, all know her and know how her asd affects her.

Her teachers really are all fantastic and really do care and look out for her.

I really hope they have not minded me emailing them on a weekend, but I really think they would do anything to try and reassure her.

Anyway , I have cancelled her place with the office staff and unless the teachers see my emails , she won't be going on Monday.

OP posts:
clam · 04/07/2015 21:13

If I was about to lead a trip abroad in the morning, and received an email pertinent to that trip about a vulnerable child who was stressing, I would certainly view it as part-and-parcel of the whole business.

NaughtToThreeSadOnions · 04/07/2015 21:10

cheryl I realy hope you never ever teach any one with SEN or in fact anyone your attitude is dreadful!

NaughtToThreeSadOnions · 04/07/2015 21:08

cheryl I think your being very rude and inconsiderate.! And just because you wouldn't want an email fine you don't answer the ones you get and be known as the unapproachable teacher the one Alll kids dread and parents hate dealing with!

However OP is your dd going with her class teacher? Or a teacher she knows well because I presume they know how on/off she's been and as they know her will understand you contacting them?

Original poster
redbeard · 04/07/2015 21:07

Nobody has been put out at all, the teachers are all going on this trip regardless and one email does not piss anybody about as you call it.

OP posts:
CherylBerylMeryl · 04/07/2015 21:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
redbeard · 04/07/2015 20:58

I haven't hounded them , I sent 1 email to each teacher apologising about it being the weekend. I really do not think they get read until school hours anyway.

A little uncalled for post I think , but also I know for sure the one teacher I emailed really want's my daughter to go ,and has told me to email him with any
concerns that may arise due to the fact my daughter has ASD which is a major factor here.

OP posts:
CherylBerylMeryl · 04/07/2015 20:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

clam · 04/07/2015 20:53

I'm a teacher and I certainly wouldn't mind receiving an email about this at the weekend.

clam · 04/07/2015 20:52

Helpful post, cheryl. Hmm

CherylBerylMeryl · 04/07/2015 20:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
redbeard · 04/07/2015 20:47

I have just said she will not be going unless I hear from anyone.

OP posts:
CherylBerylMeryl · 04/07/2015 20:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
redbeard · 04/07/2015 20:41

Sorry it's Dd. That's why I cancelled the trip for her on Friday, it's just today that she has got upset and now want's to go, she has been worried about it for a few weeks , hence me saying she had to make a decision that day.

I think I pushed her to make a final decision. Anyway it's too late to deo anything now , so unless someone gets back to me she won't be going.

OP posts:
InexperiencedDisneyMum · 04/07/2015 20:25

Is it your Dd or Ds you have posted both.

I wouldn't let them go with it being so far away if they were unsure about going in the first place. It would be different if it was local.

Original poster
redbeard · 04/07/2015 19:25

I know that the space hasn't gone , I was worried that they have cancelled his place , it's in France , so not sure if they have removed his name from all the travelling documents etc.

Still not sure whether to turn up at School on Mon or just put it down as one of those things.

Still not heard from anyone.

OP posts:
Decorhate · 04/07/2015 18:58

Knowing a little bit about school trips from the school PoV, I would say it's unlikely the space has gone, unless there was a waiting list. If they are going by coach, it would have been booked with enough seats for all who had paid & similarly the accommodation.

Original poster
redbeard · 04/07/2015 18:11

I have emailed 2 of the teachers going, I think it's a bit of a long shot and if don't hear back then there isn't much more i can do unfortunately.

OP posts:
notinminutenow · 04/07/2015 18:06

Email? Our teachers look and very often respond at weekends.

Hope it works out and she has a great time.

LynetteScavo · 04/07/2015 17:47

My DCs teachers respond almost immediately to emails, unless they are out of the country IME.

Original poster
redbeard · 04/07/2015 17:45

I do have email addresses , I assumed they were only looked at during school hours. Could give it a try.

OP posts:
LIZS · 04/07/2015 17:45

I would only let her know once you had established it was definitely possible. No point turning up to face having her turned away and making staff feel awkward.