Nice boarding schools for girls!!

Hi

Are you sure that it should be just girls? My son is at Millfield and the sense I get is that you dont get the bitchiness there. He absolutely loves it.

there is a genuine mix there with the significant scholarships for army etc.

i would recommend it.

Definitely look at Roedean. And definitely avoid Queen Anne's in Caversham if you want to steer clear of soul destroying, cliquey, bitchy girls. Sorry, just talking from personal experience of lovely dn.

I think the big problem is that there are "bitchy" girls in nearly every school. The trick is to be sufficiently robust to avoid them, not to engage with them, and have a sufficient variety of girls in the year group so that friendships can be formed with pleasant girls. My DDs went to two of the schools mentioned up thread and many of the girls were truly awful in DD2's year group at one school although DD1 had a wonderful year group there. Sadly, you just do not know what you are getting even at a school you think you know

^^^^ totally this

it only takes one influential girl to make things unpleasant

non selective schools with good results show the quality of teaching more fairly IMO

dd is at a non selective school that gets fantastic results - value added!

severs is horrid my younger dd had it, she had a year off but is back with a vengeance!!

Where does SHE want to go??

Hampton Court House in West London is surprisingly free of girl bitch groups.
However it isn't a boarding school.

I think the big problem is that there are "bitchy" girls in nearly every school. The trick is to be sufficiently robust to avoid them, not to engage with them, and have a sufficient variety of girls in the year group so that friendships can be formed with pleasant girls. My DDs went to two of the schools mentioned up thread and many of the girls were truly awful in DD2's year group at one school although DD1 had a wonderful year group there. Sadly, you just do not know what you are getting even at a school you think you know.

In my view schools do not really deal with their difficult pupils because they literally cannot afford to. Short term exclusions are used but the girls come back and start all over again. At plenty of schools like this there are parents who have not explained to their children that they don't get their own way all the time and therefore these children have a sense of entitlement backed up by the parents. The parents are so rich, they are entitled too! Generally though, it is best not to compete and leave them to it. I also think better friendships are formed from year 10 when GCSE teaching groups are formed. Children can find the pupils more like them in their teaching groups.

Did your DD board at the country prep? Where did the majority of girls go to from that school? Many boarding schools have lots of overseas boarders and quite a few schools are weekly boarding so this might be better for you. Also, very many schools are capable of teaching bright pupils. Just because they are less selective, does not mean schools don't get good results with the pupils they have. Tudor Hall is perfectly academic for most! You have pigeonholed some schools rather unfairly!

That sounds like a lot of school changes.....

yes i agree with sylvanians

I appreciate that I am probably not one of the usual responders to this kind of thread, but to me one very obvious means of responding to a child who is 'fragile' and who has had several bad school experiences is to discount boarding altogether. Is there a reason why this can't be the case? Because surely one major way of maximising support for your child not only through transitioning schools but also longer term would be to opt for day schooling - allowing a. You to be an everyday supportive presence and B. To give her the 'outlet' of a home life and a sanctuary.

Changing schools must be hard even for a confident child. Boarding even more so, surely, for very obvious social reasons. For a fragile child, a huge ask. Surely day schooling to GCSE would be a far easier, kinder thing?

I have to agree with Priorsfield. My daughter loves it there.

As someone mentioned bursaries - even if you're not looking for one it might be wise to seek out a school that is serious about offering significant help to the talented but not-wealthy. It means a (slightly) more diverse intake and sets a certain tone - with brains and achievement being more celebrated than Gucci bags and numbers of acres at home. (That's the idea anyway ...)

There's Woldingham on the outskirts of London, and she could weekly board there. I don't know it directly, but have heard more and more good things about it, plus extremely good things about the head. It's Catholic, but not oppressively so.

Which school did the majority of girls from her country prep go on to? Could you try that?

Tbh you get bitchy girls at all schools mixed and single sex - it really gets better in year 10 when things get more serious.

Does it have to be boarding?

What about Royal Masonic School for girls at Rickmansworth?
I worked there a few years ago and while not for the academically gifted girl it is good for the average one.

Beechwood Sacred Heart in Tunbridge Wells is lovely. One hour from London, and excellent pastoral care. It used to be all girls, but has fairly recently become co-educational.

Princess Helena College.
St Francis College
Queen Anne's, Caversham

Godolphin School, Salisbury. I used to board there. Train to London takes an hour and a half.

Friends daughter is here and she really likes it..... www.thorntoncollege.com/

What about St Edwards Oxford coed but has a very well deserved reputation for outstanding pastoral care, a mixture of girls high achieving, musical, sporty, arty, shy, extrovert, ones into ballet, drama, boys and clothes in the main normal teenagers all who thrive in a caring happy environment.

Marist school ascot or St George's school ascot or Heathfield school ascot, all very good, know parents from all schools and all very happy :)

I would second Mayfield. Nice mix. You can be clever, and they do particularly well with maths/science, but you don't need to be. Lots of singing and pottery. And horses. Unpretentious. More international in the sixth form but the group includes Mexicans and Spanish.

Prior's Field in Godalming? London girls tend to weekly board. Not a hot house, no more bitchiness than any other girls' school. Not academically selective- challenging for bright girls, supportive for not so academic ones. Lots of sport, drama, all the usual add on stuff. Head of Pastoral is excellent, will support a fragile child really well. Mine was a nightmare the first half term, went into total meltdown. Pastoral care was very good. Good mix of parents, from super wealthy to those working really hard to send their girls there. Lots of normality. Good Luck!

I wonder if it's possible to find a school, state or independent, where teenage girls do not talk relentlessly about clothes and boys?

You don't mention it but, if your DD finds friendships with boys at least as worthwhile as with girls, perhaps a co-ed school might work better.

And, from what I've seen, independent schools that make a point of not welcoming international pupils do tend to be rather inward looking ...

They offer bursaries which are means tested too, and not just given to existing pupils :)