LEH OR G&L

What school is she currently going to? I sent my daughter to LEH when I got offers from both schools. What school is ur DD going to?

Great news, congratulations to your dd. Hope she has a wonderful time.

Oh phew, really pleased to hear it Cristal! I hope she has a wonderful time there and gets as much out of it as she can :)

Thanks Mulberry 10 that's very useful to know. We will probably leave the decision to DD as we don't think there's much between the two and both have their advantages.

Well done cristal - I'm sure you and your DD will be really pleased with your decision.

Lynharvey - if it's not too late - we are really pleased with our choice of G&L. I honestly can't think of anything I don't like about it. We came from state primary and there was a bit of an adjustment, but nothing that would have been any different at any of the other high achieving private schools. It really is a lovely, warm, happy school which manages to get very good results without any obvious pressure. Are you still thinking LU though?

That's good to hear - I'm sure she'll be very happy at LEH and she'll be very busy as a music scholar. My niece is very active in music there and it's a fantastically high standard and the musicians get some wonderful opportunities.

If you'd lived closer to G&L I'd have been suggesting that instead - not having a stressful commute at this age (or any age, frankly) makes such a difference :)

Mulberry10 thanks for your earlier post.As decision day is looming are you generally very happy with your choice of G&L and is there anything you don't
like about it?

Agree, OP ended up by saying she'd prefer LEH but dd was leaning towards G&L, HOWEVER, I would say to move house because a 10/11-year-old child expresses a preference for a school is absurd.

Not wishing to open this up again (although I think you're being a bit hard on the OP, who seems to be saying that she was hoping her DD would be convinced in favour of LEH) - but just to clarify for anyone reading that Lacrosse is not played at Godolphin at all.

I struggle to agree with your hypothesis that G&L is more selective than LEH. I know several girls who have gone there in the last year or two because they didn't get LEH. Does that make it less selective than LEH? Probably not but illustrates the fact that the margins between getting into these schools and not is very tight, and some exams suit some children better than others.

I agree that the 2014 leavers destinations aren't as impressive from LEH, but as Poisonwood has said above and many times on different threads, the class of 2014 at LEH was a bit atypical. Other people's leavers destinations are irrelevant anyway - if your daughter proves to be Oxbridge/Yale/Harvard material she will have a good chance of achieving that from either school. But like others I'm not sure that a US degree course is what a typical 10 or 11 year old aspires to

I will soon have 4 children at 4 different indies in this area - but what all have in common is a very straightforward journey and I wouldn't want it any other way.

sorry but you are mad to be even considering G&L - I have nothing against the school, I went there myself and it was brilliant but I would not have thanked my parents if they'd made me take 3 trains to get there. I've just turned down a job which would have had a similar commute as it just wasn't feasible 5 days a week

This thread is really distressing me! Please listen. Your dd didn't get SPGS but did get LEH. This is the destination school for the brightest girls in Teddington, Twickenham, Hampton, Esher etc... Only one from dd's outstanding primary got in. And your dd has been offered a music scholarship to arguably one of the most musical schools in the country. You should be SO proud. To even consider a complicated journey to a school you perceive to be marginally better is pure lunacy. You are not putting your dd's best interests at heart. The "IB" argument is you not your dd, and at 11, is a nonsense. Let your dd change school for sixth form if she wants to then but for the next 5 years the logistics are critical.

Hi OP,
I am in agreement with all those who said constructively that the commute is a deal breaker. When I made my slightly tongue in cheek comments earlier in the thread I had assumed the commute was equal between the two schools and you had the luxury of as one poster said a few years ago of ‘whether to wear the diamonds or the pearls’ - not that I have either I would have picked LEH for my DD in a heartbeat rather than sending her on the commute you are planning. Our friends who send their DDs to LEH are down to earth lovely people as are our friends who have daughters at G&L. They are both great schools as I said. Your DD will find her niche in either school and will be happy. She will most definitely not be happy with a 3 change commute.

It is not just the time taken on the journey, which may in theory, all three changes working perfectly, be 40 minutes. It is also the time she will have to set out. If the journey picks up the district line at Richmond there is a particular train that the Hammersmith school pupils all pick up, she will want to be on that, I can't remember the exact time but it is early, 7.30ish. So in the case of my DDs friend that meant a train before 7am from Teddington. That is a very early start and believe me you want these teenagers to be in bed for as long as possible, they struggle to go to sleep early even if you could lock them in a darkened room at 10pm, it is physiological nothing to do with parenting, and if they have had rehearsals, then homework they won't be getting to bed early. Teenagers can be horrible at the best of times but an overtired one? And tired minds don't work as well, ask any teacher.

And if you are moving further in you are going to be downsizing, and you are going to be the ones living with the consequences of her decision, it is not a decision that should lead to extra stress on the whole family...

I normally say that the decision at 11 should be theirs, because they are the ones that live with it, but in this case the weight of Mumsnet really does make it a no brainer.

I wonder how much this is due to bigging up SPGS as a destination school, and G&L seems like next best and a consolation prize for a child who feels she has failed you. Time to big up LEH and all its advantages and how very very very proud you are of her music scholarship to one of the most academically successful schools in the country, and certainly one of the most musically successful, Choir of the Year etc.

I agree strongly with people above. Get her to do the commute in the morning rush hour, carrying a school rucksack, a musical instrument and music folder, a swim bag and a lacrosse stick. (use a tennis racket or hockey stick). Lacrosse is a BIG part of the G&L sports curriculum, like LEH. And compulsory even if she has no interest in making the squad.

My dd regularly has a load like this for the ten minute journey on the school bus that leaves just 2 mins away from our house. Even that gets her sighing at 7.45 in the morning. Oh did I mention, school starts at 8.45, but girls often all meet up at 8.15 for a school breakfast, swap homework notes, test each other for vocab test later in the day, weekend chat etc. It's the social part of school day and quite important to my daughter to be in for that from time to time.

On your practice journey, do NOT assist her in any way, in terms of carrying her heavy load, giving up your seat or even pointing her in the right direction of the exit or prompting her where to get off. Think about what her alternative route would be if nothing is going in or out of Richmond station or a.n.other keystone station she would need to use. (has happened to me x 2 recently.)

In fact, follow at 30 paces, so she doesn't have your jolly banter to keep her mind off the stress of the journey.

A similar route is the bain of MY life, carrying just a handbag containing a light Macbook Air and an umbrella! But at least I get paid to do it! And I only make 2 changes, not 3. My journey can take anything from 50 mins to 1hour 50mins, depending on the state of the transport system.

One of my dd's friends has a long, difficult commute, she really pities her. "Poor friend, mummy , she can never join in x or y and her mum has said she cannot go to afterschool club z because she'll miss her travel connections." Don't let your dd be that child.

I wouldn't wish it on an 11 year old.

Have to say I'm glad my girls are in older years as you sound a like nightmare parent. You would consider moving away from a perfectly good school to be closer to a school that wasn't even your first choice, spgs was, when you weren't even considering moving beforehand. Or you're saying that to see how your poor dd does with the travel to make yourself feel that you might if you need to because g&l offers so much more than leh, which few would agree with. I'm not sure but I'd guess you're in Kingston. If you are you're living in lala land if you think that's a 40 minute journey door to door at 8 in the morning. On paper you really come across as one of 'those' parents. Earlier in the thread you said that your daughter would like to have the options of IB and studying abroad. She is 10 or 11, seriously that's not her talking at all. My 12 year old doesn't know what IB is really and is certainly not thinking past GCSEs. At 10/11 I was trying persuade her that she really was too old for build a bears. Apologies that this is not in any way constructive but reading between the lines it does seem that you are set on g&l and I very much hope you choose it. Do the parents at leh a favour and go for g&l, please.

True. Dd is going to KGS with an easy 3 stop train ride. However I freely expect to be whizzing her down to Kingston bridge on the days she is overloaded with kit/musical instrument.

On the subject of trying the commute...make her do it with heavy rucksack, sports bag, swim bag, art folder and musical instrument...

I see the girls/boys getting on the coach for LEH/Hampton and they struggle with all their stuff...I would hate to have to do that on public transport.

Mulberry10: "The families you're talking about do exist at the school, but they are a small percentage and their presence really is not reflected in the ethos or day to day experience of the school or girls... The vast majority of families are perfectly grounded..."

Apologies for intruding on a discussion about G&L and LEH but is the above observation also true of other West London indies (eg, Latymer Upper, SPGS)?

Where will she be travelling from each day if you don't move nearer?

I also sent my daughter into the tube ahead of me. It was scary seeing this little girl swallowed up by the crowd. Not least because a rather dodgy looking man decided to watch her in an odd way. She was fine, but she already travelled home on her own during Yr 6. Unusual at the time, but a real advantage when it came to year 7.

Its not unreasonable for her to want to see both schools. However take her on Monday morning by public transport leaving at the normal school time. Crowded trains, crowded platforms. Better still get her to carry a heavy rucksack. Tell her the journey has to be part of the decision. DD commuted 40 minutes which is the maximum she or I would have wanted. However the journey was very reliable, frequency of trains was good, and she was commuting out rather than in so got a seat.

Both schools are big enough for her to find "her people". It sounds as if at LEH she will have a ready place in the orchestra and thus a ready pool of friends beyond her class. This is important in what are often the socially difficult Yr7 & 8.

I don't think you should put your daughter through 5-7 years of a three train journey - that will seriously impact on her study time let alone anything else