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Original poster

bright year 9 struggling in school

60 replies

Mmmbacon · 18/01/2015 18:03

Dd is quite bright and well capable of a and b's but her Christmas test results are disgracefully all c and ds

She is already doing after school homework and study club but hasn't had the desired effect,

Her maths for exp went from 90's last year to 55 this year, she has no reason not to be getting A's in maths as I do maths grinds as a side line,

Any advice on how to get her to buckle down, really struggling with her as although behaviour is ok when she is not with us she is different child, caught shoplifting once etc,

She had traumatic exp few years back, diagnosed with ptsd, but psychologist recently very happy with her,

She wants to become a teacher so needs to really buckle down now to have a chance

OP posts:
Armpitt · 20/01/2015 22:07

2 hours a night for year 9 sounds DULL and too much
its Two years until her exams!!

titchy · 20/01/2015 22:05

Give the teacher a chance - you can't expect her to drop everything and mark the he immediately!

Original poster
Mmmbacon · 20/01/2015 21:57

Ok so back to maths as that is bone of contention with me, dd didn't understand school work and admittedly after lecture from me for not asking for help she came home and asked for help, so went through everything with her, made sure she understood homework, and corrected it for her, she went to school and I asked what teacher said etc and dd said she didn't look at it never mind correct, Mark or ask if anyone had any difficulty!

Beginning to think it is more school than homework or ddSad

OP posts:
pointythings · 20/01/2015 21:36

My DD is on course for As and A* in all her subjects and has no more than 5-6 hours of homework a week. She revises during break and lunch and then tops up at home, so she's doing nowhere near as much as your DD is. I think your DD's school is not teaching effectively if they think a Yr9 needs this much homework. Towards Yr10 the focus should be on revision and independent working/research as well.

Hakluyt · 20/01/2015 21:35

Utterly ridiculous!

I have an able year 9 and he does an absolute maximum average of an hour a day, usually less. Nothing at all on Friday- he does two after school clubs, and nothing on Saturday- sport. He sets aside a couple of hours on a Sunday in case he needs it but usually he doesn't. He is always on top of his homework.

His sister as in a very well regarded grammar school and she wasn't doing that sort of homework timetable until GCSE year.

Is she doing work that is set, and marked and returned? What sort of marks is she getting for it? Are all her friends working the same sort of hours?

Original poster
Mmmbacon · 20/01/2015 21:23

Ok, so school came back with recommending 9-11 hours per week of homework plus revision, so Dr bang in the middle of those guides, year head said she thinks dd is either dumbing down or genuinely hasn't a notion on how to study effectively, and possibility of both,
so she is going to make appt with school councillor for dd and see what next term brings,

Would still like to hear from other year 9 parents to compare as I am still questioning now if two hours is too much or normal at this age, particularly as head said she recommends 15+ for year tenConfused maybe this is norm but seems an awful lot,

OP posts:
Phoenixfrights · 20/01/2015 16:41

Personally I think anything more than 5 hrs per week of any kind of homework is too much. I certainly never did more than that and did very well. Is the school doing its job properly, is what I am wondering here.

Unexpected · 20/01/2015 08:49

Poor girl sounds exhausted to me. I have a DS in Yr9, at one of the top performing comps in the country, and he seems to have hardly any homework at all! We would be lucky if he did two hours a week! I appreciate our school is slightly unusual in having gone in the opposite direction but it seems to work for them. For GCSE, there really is no need to be doing two hours a night in Yr9.

I know you said you love your daughter and are proud of her but your language and phrasing suggests otherwise. You seem to think that the only options are that she is lazy, distracted or uninterested, not that she is crying out for help, of which the shoplifting seems to be a classic sign. I hope she is not aware of your thoughts and that she actually feels you are supporting her.

Speak to her teachers, cut back on the after-school homework, let her keep her activities up, make sure she is sleeping enough and eating properly, and if she really needs maths tutoring pay for someone else to do it - teaching your own child is mostly a recipe for disaster!

SugarPlumTree · 20/01/2015 07:31

I think she is utterly knackered and you are seeing that reflected in her grades.

Pensionerpeep · 20/01/2015 00:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Mmmbacon · 20/01/2015 00:06

Thanks for your. Posthedgehog it is reassuring to know she is not only one struggling, and to acknowledge the balancing act between supportive parenting and pushy parenting, I didn't think I was w pushy parent untill I read some of these replies and thought gees am I pushy or supporting Dd to be best she can be,

Dd knows we are immensely proud of her she is sweet thoughtful and despite trauma of few years back has ploughed through her fears and hasn't left her hold her back

Will be giving her cuddle in am before I drop her off to school just becauseSmile

OP posts:
Thehedgehogsong · 19/01/2015 23:40

I think this is something I see a lot at work, kids switching off because they don't see the point of trying to reach standards they feel are too high. There's a lot of 'well x and y's parents don't make them do that!'

I believe we should push and challenge our children but when they see others getting away with less it is hard to keep them interested in hard work. Year 8/9 is especially hard for this as they just can't see too far in the future when they're dealing with friendships as well as school and home expectations. It's tough, for them and their teachers and parents. I wish we could just let them take a break from the pressure and take time to find themselves or de-stress but it's a conveyer belt and they have deadlines. I'm sure she's feeling disappointed in her results too. Perhaps this is a good time to tell her the pressure she is under is bound to make her feel stressed and give her some techniques to manage it, as well as reassuring her that her value to you is not tied up in test scores.

Original poster
Mmmbacon · 19/01/2015 23:37

Self directed but directed by teachers coming up to tests,

Think I am going to ask school if they have anyone Could go through different types of study styles aswell ad recommended times

OP posts:
StripeyCustard · 19/01/2015 23:35

Biscuit. Hope it's one of those threads.

piggychops · 19/01/2015 23:29

Is her revision self-directed or do you organise it for her?

Original poster
Mmmbacon · 19/01/2015 23:20

Haklyut we are in UK now, she does two hours every evening, about an hour to 90 mins On set homework and the balance is on revision or just reading as she is avid reader, I pick up at before six, I thought this was about normal but maybe I need to be speaking to school for more guidance,

OP posts:
Hakluyt · 19/01/2015 22:39

I don't know how public exams fall iin Ireland but in England 2 hours a night sounds a lot for year 9. Is that all set work?

Original poster
Mmmbacon · 19/01/2015 22:12

Phoenix, can you tell me how much homework and study you think a year 9 should be doing, I genuinely didn't think 2 hours combined was a lot, esp when she has no homework or study to do at weekend as she has it all done by Friday,
As I said she has 3 activities, but two of these are fun but supervised/

structured hang with friends activities, if it weren't for them she wouldn't see friends afterschool as we live in the back end of no where, she really enjoys them esp the Friday
Night one as its the start of weekend for them, plus she loves going on tour with them, teen table quiz, onesies discos, she would take it as a punishment to be not allowed go to. her activities,

Will look at reducing after school hours once I talk to school councillor to see what they say 're both results and suggested homework time for her year

OP posts:
Hakluyt · 19/01/2015 19:26

I would skip the after school things and let her come home- she doesn't appear to have any down time at all in her day! When does she hang out with her friends/watch TV?

Phoenixfrights · 19/01/2015 19:18

Also you don't say what the trauma was and I would not even dream of asking for details, but.... she must be in the throes of puberty now. Even if she was fine at the time hormones are tricky blighters and can really muck you up. Work may not be high on her agenda right now.

Phoenixfrights · 19/01/2015 19:15

I think thay is way too much schoolwork/ formal learning out of school time for a 13/14 year old. An hour every day plus homework on top, plus piano which she only sometimes likes...
....

Original poster
Mmmbacon · 19/01/2015 13:54

Liz's dd is more than capable, and tbh pressure in our family Is to try and do your best, rather than unachievable level you must meet, if all she was capapable of On best Day was 60 and she got 55 I would be dancing and singing On rooftops it's the fact that she is not working to her potential,

The afterschool stuff, she does het homework and at most an hour of study or reading Mon to Friday, then she has 2 club activities she loves, completely youth centred, so no training studying or practice required, just Good fun, the other is music which sometimes she likes more times not so much, but she knows she must go to lessons to learn piano to play what she likes not just move up the grades, and I definitely don't push her on practice as she plays without intervention from me.

We'll spotted rainbows I do hail from the rebel county originally

OP posts:
unweavedrainbow · 19/01/2015 08:29

en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grinds

I think the OP must be in Ireland...

ExitPursuedByABear · 19/01/2015 08:22

Maths was always a grind to me.

Sounds like she is doing to much.

Talk to her teacher.

LIZS · 19/01/2015 08:19

or exp's . Do remember that you may be mathematical but maybe she isn't. Or maybe something has triggered her ptsd. btw 55 will still pass a GCSE and with sufficient qualifications she can still teach.