What did your ASD child struggle with in Secondary School?

My dd is year 9 and has Aspergers, dyspraxia and dyscalculia. She sounds very similar to your dd. These are things she found tough in year 7.

Lockers, she couldn't manage a padlock or work out what she should put in the locker so ended up carrying everything around in her, very heavy, bag.

Finding her way around, the map was impossible for her to follow.

PE, everything about it!

Form time, she couldn't cope with the noise level and everyone being on their phones, iPods etc and the general chaos. She still goes to Curriculum support for form time.

The timetable, as others have mentioned. It was all initials for teachers and codes for rooms and subjects. I retyped it in a more user friendly way and laminated.

I gave dd a couple of plastic folders labelled Homework, Letters home etc.

Her primary school friendships broke down very quickly. Dd was so anxious and stressed she relied on her friends very heavily. She asked them to get her to lessons as she got lost, then they would be late. She was demanding with them and angry and they all just had enough of her. I didn't know any of this was happening until it was too late to fix it

The main issue for ds has been persuading him that group work is a good idea. He thinks that as he usually already knows the answer, there's no point in having a discussion about it. His teachers looked at pairing him up with people instead and so far it's working well. His current 'partner' is actually very similar to him, so they get on well.

PE is still never going to be his favourite subject, but it helped when he was given permission to get changed in a different room.

Ds has no interest in socialising with other people at breaktimes/lunchtime so he goes to the computer rooms or library instead. There are also lunchtime clubs for those who want them.

Handwriting is a problem, as ds' work always look as though it was written by a 5yr-old. His writing is also very slooooow. Using a laptop to type his work has helped.

These are some of the things that helped:
Lock laces (he still can't tie shoelaces).
Teaching him how to remove his tie without undoing the knot.
Colour coding the subjects and reprinting the timetable more clearly.
Giving him a routine for before school and after school, and trying not to vary it.

DS2 (Asperger's/ADHD) is coming to the end of Y7 in a partially selective, single sex mainstream state school.

Things that have gone better than we expected: everything, especially self-organisation, making friends, appropriate behaviour in lessons.

Unlike primary:
The staff set out their expectations very clearly and literally.
If he gets into trouble, they explain to him where he went wrong.
They don't shout at him.
They stick to the timetable.
They can cope with him asking tangential questions.
They mark work constructively and positively.

He is much happier than he was in primary school.

DS is in year 7.

Massive meltdowns over not being able to find books to take into school - only to find that the teacher had collected them in. The school teachers very helpfully started reminding him to write down when his book was collected/returned.

Still struggling over friendships - but going to lunchtime clubs makes that a bit better. Including massive upsets that everyone else had girlfriends and people only asked him out as a joke/dare.

Class detentions - when he is convinced he had done nothing wrong. First time he wrote a letter to the teacher to 'complain' and she hasn't done it since although other teachers still do.

DS1 (ADD) - year 8

Has been hard but what has helped:

• lunchtime clubs
• doing stuff outside of school
• at school he has a weekly meet with a youth worker
• loads of communication, they want me to talk to him
• nt sweating the small stuff, the odd day off, missing sports day & music day because we knew it would be really tough because of sensory issues
• agreed dispensations on uniform because of sensory issues
• lots of debrief chats so you can head stuff at the beginning

What you will find is your daughter has a whole lot of language / sexual images thrown at her and as ADD will find it difficult to screen. Some very clear guidelines early on helps.

If I think of anything else will let you know.