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After School Detentions

136 replies

hippppy · 27/05/2014 13:58

Please do not come in on the attack!

My son is at a secondary Free School, they are in temporary accommodation and tucked away. They have no bus route and are not near a train station.

The days are very long already. They HAVE to stay for an hour of clubs every day. Unfortunately these clubs do not seem too much fun... Juggling, Magic club, textiles.. (thats another story!)

My son recently has been labled G&T, and now G&T underachieving and SEN (because he is G&T) his behavior at school is getting out of control, he is rude and cheeky to teachers and is very bored in class.

He is grounded at home, no internet or phone. I have constantly tried to work with the school, I am in no way letting him off for his poor behavior at school!!!!

I have told the school I am going to remove him and put him into a normal state school. Unfortunately this will take up to 10 school days and I feel this has upset the Head.

He was suspended on Wednesday for being rude to teachers and the Head insisted I collected him. I do not drive and my son comes in a car share. I am a single parent on a very low income with two children and all week I have not been able to go to work. (self employed) A taxi back from the school is £30.

A couple of weeks ago the head insisted he came in on inset day, this resulted in two trains and a taxi. After this I wrote the head a long email stating that I simply cannot send him in taxi's home and I thought the school had accepted that.

He was naughty on Friday (I AM NOT TRYING TO EXCUSE HIS BEHAVIOUR!) and the Head rang me very late in the day saying he was going to KEEP my son and he would miss his lift home. I tried to explain I do not have the money to put him in a Taxi but the Head was very firm and insisted I would just have to find him a way home.

He is only 12, I do feel uncomfortable sending him in a taxi with a stranger. I had to ring four taxi companies as everyone was booked up and ended up putting him in a car with a firm I am not familiar with (CRB checked etc) He didn't get home until 6.45pm)

I do not think this school is the best place for my son. He is very unhappy there! I have spent hours on the phone trying to move him somewhere else. I have had many worries about the school but as it is new I have tried to work with them but its all getting out of control.

I do not have the money to put him in a taxi and i'm worried that this will end up costing me my job. This is costing me a fortune!

10 days left (ish) Can I refuse to allow the school to keep my son after school? Or can I home ed until he gets a place in the other school?

Thank you in advance

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noblegiraffe · 27/05/2014 18:28

Here are the DfE rules:

  1. School staff should not issue a detention where they know that doing so would compromise a child's safety. When ensuring that a detention outside school hours is reasonable, staff issuing the detention should consider the following points: ? Whether the detention is likely to put the pupil at risk. ? Whether the pupil has known caring responsibilities which mean that the detention is unreasonable. ? Whether the parents ought to be informed of the detention. In many cases it will be necessary to do so, but this will depend on the circumstances. For instance, notice may not be necessary for a short after school detention where the pupil can get home safely; and ? Whether suitable travel arrangements can be made by the parent for the pupil. It does not matter if making these arrangements is inconvenient for the parent.

So £30 for a CRB checked taxi isn't good enough reason for a head to not give an after school detention.

At my school setting off the fire alarm gets a fixed term exclusion. The head sounds a bit inexperienced if he is only issuing a detention for this, especially on the top of all the other poor behaviour.

EvilTwins · 27/05/2014 18:25

Are you asking me or being hypothetical? I have an English degree so would be perfectly fine teaching GCSE & A Level English, thanks, despite currently being "only" a drama teacher. How do you know your DS's doesn't?

Free schools can employ whoever the hell they like, as already pointed out.

On a side note, though, plenty of schools employ teachers who teach something other than their degree subject. One of my colleagues has a performing arts degree and an English PGCE but teaches Child Development, and does so bloody well.

Sundaedelight · 27/05/2014 18:16

The English teacher does sound poorly equipped to teach the subject. I hope that your son finds his feet quickly at his new school and settles well.

fourcorneredcircle · 27/05/2014 18:09

It's not normal. It's a free school and one of their principle ideas is that they so not need to employ qualified teachers. She may not even have a degree.

hippppy · 27/05/2014 18:09

Thank you trapper.. I will phone LEA in the morning :)

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hippppy · 27/05/2014 18:05

Also, would you feel it's acceptable for you to teach English to children that are working at GCSE/A level or above when you have only an A level yourself? Not trying to higher the horse but really this wouldn't work!

I am grade 8 piano, I would not try and teach someone grade 7 as I wouldn't be good enough. Surely in a school this would not be acceptable?

The English teacher is not an English teacher. She makes spelling mistake and puts capital letters in the middle of words..

Sorry but this can't be normal..

I'm hooking him out and it's for the best. I understand that he will be watched by the next school and I hope that this move will be in his best interests.

It's a tricky situation!

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Trapper · 27/05/2014 17:52

You have my sympathy OP. It is a bad situation and 10 days of escalation between DC and school are not going to help anyone. If the situation is as bad as you describe, it sounds like there is a real risk I someone getting hurt. Take your son out today - I can't see you have much of an option. Inform the LEA and see if you can accelerate the process. It sounds like you took a risk with this school to give your DC a leg up. I'm sorry it hasn't worked out that way.

Sundaedelight · 27/05/2014 17:49

You can move him to another school and the same behavioural issues may continue.
Maybe it's him not the school. Are you simply changing the scenery?
Was he a different, better behaved pupil in his previous school? Why?

Generally though, most pupils behave despite the school they attend.

SuburbanRhonda · 27/05/2014 17:48

The school promised the earth!

You know what they say about if it sounds too good to be true, it probably is.

As well as moving your DS, you need to have a serious talk with him about the behaviour you expect once he's moved. If he thinks for a minute that you're blaming the previous school for his poor behaviour, he will never get back on track.

EvilTwins · 27/05/2014 17:39

I don't think you can blame the school for your child's behaviour. Rudeness to adults etc is never acceptable.

tiggytape · 27/05/2014 17:38

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

hippppy · 27/05/2014 17:37

Thanks clary.. I'm learning to drive at the mo.. And also thinking of moving to get in a better catchment.. I know what he did was naughty and I am just trying to do what is best!!!

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hippppy · 27/05/2014 17:35

Oh for gods sake, what a load of nonsense.

I have only ever tried to do what is best for my son. The school promised the earth! Are options are very limited here and unless you have cash or are of faith the catchment schools are really not the best. I am regrettably pulling him from this school and having to send him to one that I have not heard the best things about. Saying that, I have spoken with them in length and they have been very supportive.

I think you will find I'm on a very small donkey rather than a high horse. £30 is a lot of money at the moment! Other schools are at least commutable, so I think this is an unfair punishment on me!

It is very easy for a school to point a finger at one child than except there is a bigger issue within the school. As I have said, lots of children are leaving! I have remained polite and apologetic for my sons behavior but there will come a time where I simply do not have £30 in my purse.. How can that be fair!

Anyway, I'm taking him out and I feel home ed until he starts the other school will probably be best!

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clary · 27/05/2014 17:33

FWIW if a child set off the fire alarm at the school I work at they would be permanently excluded.

I know because this has happened while I have worked there.

Having said that OP, if he is moving to another school then I would let the school know and remove him. It is a shame that you are so far from all schools. Is there any way (as a longer term measure) you could move house or learn to drive to make your life a bit easier?

fourcorneredcircle · 27/05/2014 17:27

Thanks EvilTwins - I thought I was alone in this horse high world.

EvilTwins · 27/05/2014 17:25

You chose to send your son there, so this is your responsibility. The fire alarm issue is serious and I think an after school detention is a very light punishment - if he was at my school, he would have had at least a 1 day exclusion and you would have been called in for a re-admission meeting with the Head.

Also, the Drama teacher may well be perfectly qualified to teach English. I have an A Level in English (grade A) and a very good degree in English & Theatre but currently teach Drama, so get off your own high horse!

Wickeddevil · 27/05/2014 17:24

I agree with Nocomet. This cant be any fun for your DS.
Hope you get sorted out soon. I think this is about the future not the present and think it is unlikely that your son will learn anything further at this school. I would Home Educate him and not send him back.

fourcorneredcircle · 27/05/2014 17:19

I'm not trying to attack it just doesn't seem that you understand how serious this is and that the school haven't done anything 'wrong'. Your son haant being 'naughty' he has broken the law and repeatedly broken school rules. I'm also trying to tell you that your sons cards will now be 'marked' and you may have to deal with a lot worse before it gets better. Yes, it was a gamble to choose this school and I'm sorry it didn't work out for your family but I think you're on an equally high horse talking of single parent families and taxi fares and a journey that YOU chose to put in your child when there were other schools available.

fourcorneredcircle · 27/05/2014 17:08

Why would the free school contact the LEA? They are out of their control. I think the most likely people they will talk to will be your sons next school so that they can pass on exactly what the issues have been. It is also likely that the new school will contact them and not the other way around. Be prepared for your son being watched like a hawk and the school being unprepared to accept te slightest misdemeanour before coming down hard.

hippppy · 27/05/2014 17:08

I am trying to do everything via email now so I have a copy. Thank you.

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hippppy · 27/05/2014 17:05

Gamble not gable! On my phone..

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hippppy · 27/05/2014 17:05

Thanks mouldingsunbeams.

And to the attack..

We live in quite a rural area, all schools are at least a bus away. There was talk at the beginning of the year our area may have a coach supplied, but this did not happen. A car share scheme was put in place. The school is not a million miles away but awkward to get to. It was a gable sending him to the free school and one I now regret.

Yes setting off the fire alarm is bad. I am not saying it isn't! I am just trying to find a way to get through the next couple of weeks as I cannot afford taxi's! So get off your high horse.. Knew this would happen!

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moldingsunbeams · 27/05/2014 16:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

moldingsunbeams · 27/05/2014 16:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

hippppy · 27/05/2014 16:49

It does. He started at the start if year 7 in September - brand new school.

The head is making things really hard for me. No matter how hard I try and explain he still keeps issuing after school DT's!

If the school had a bus, what near a station or walkable to a bus stop then ok. But I feel a taxi so late on the evening with a stranger is not a safe or reasonable way for my son to get home. Plus it's £30!

I have gone to meetings (some very poinltess) parents evenings etc and have not complained about transport. This is really stressing me out! To some it would simply be a case of getting in their car and picking up an hour later, but to me (and I'm sure others) the punishment is really on the parent not the child.

I am thinking about making a complaint, unsure who too first. The school are not listening!

Thank you for all the replies. It's nice to know I'm not the only one that thinks this is unreasonable..

I think I will call LEA tomorrow for advice and ask about home ed for the time being.

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