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Original poster

Ideas for bright girl secondary in London

58 replies

MarriedDadOneSonOneDaughter · 11/03/2014 17:58

Having sorted out the lad, my attention turns to the lass. Currently at state primary year 3. Rated year 5/6 for Maths and year 7(!) for English. Somewhat of a perfectionist and sensitive to mistakes/failure. Very social and into performing arts and quite sporty.

I

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Original poster
MarriedDadOneSonOneDaughter · 14/03/2014 10:52

DaftMaul

.... maybe .... Blush

I only expend that kind of energy on the most important of things. Most of the time, pretty relaxed .... Wink

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DaftMaul · 14/03/2014 09:07

'Somewhat of a perfectionist'

Do you think she might get this from you? Wink Grin

14 schools?! Shock

Original poster
MarriedDadOneSonOneDaughter · 12/03/2014 09:20

RabbitCar Thanks. That's one to put on my list. Always good to hear experiences.

basildonbond I agree. She will change as will the school. I started in year 4 with my son visiting 14 schools over a 2 year period. I think there are more choices available for girls and so I will have more to see and therefore want to start earlier. The long run in gives me the time to see the ones I like annually until year 5 when I can take her to a short list. Yes, I know, I have to much time on my hands and am taking this far too seriously, but I can't think of any decisions that is more important to me than big decisions for my girl.

Theas18 You are spot on. Aptitude and seeking perfection can be a real barrier to progress, especially if you have self doubt and less than a lot of self confidence. I'd swap 5% of her brilliance for confidence any day!. My son has confidence in spades and I am sure this is why he breezed through 10+. Confidence is like a magic ingredient that turbo charges even the smallest amount of ability. He could be "knocked down and get up again" over and over. Call it resilience or persistence, but I think it stems from ultimate self confidence. Can I buy a bottle of "confidence" somewhere?

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Theas18 · 12/03/2014 08:51

No school recommendation from me but suggest (from own experience and recent posts on secondary here) that you try to address her perfectionist traits a little just to mould them a bit into " open to risk" and "know I wont be right all he the time and that's OK too" sort of thinking.

I have perfectionist kids, it's not a trait that helps really. I heard on the radio last week that the good thing about bringing computer games into education is that risk is expected then- 50:50 chance of success is taken on by all kids in that format and risk is necessary for learning. My eldest had a miserable time with GCSE art as she was seeking " perfect" and it never was.... School have evolved (6yrs between the girls) and the youngest is still a perfectionist but willing to take risks and sometimes fall and get up again- they have worked hard on resilience in form time etc

Wish I'd have known this when the eldest was 7.

basildonbond · 12/03/2014 06:33

Oh and I think y3 is too early to start looking - your dd will change a lot in the next two years as will your school options (eg heads will leave, catchment areas change etc) so I'd leave it for at least another year

basildonbond · 12/03/2014 06:31

No recommendations from me as we're in a different area of London but just to say that my dd is also somewhat of a perfectionist who's very strong in English. I think it's even harder to be a perfectionist if your natural bent is towards the arts as at least in maths it's possible to get 100% all the time

Dd is going to a co-ed secondary in September as I worried that the v high-powered girls school would exacerbate her perfectionist tendencies

Rabbitcar · 11/03/2014 22:10

DD1 goes to Henrietta Barnett School in NW11. Like your DD, she is academic, but also very sporty and musical. She absolutely loves it and does very well there, and is confident and popular. My instinct is that she may not have been as happy at some of the indies, as some girls there can be frighteningly confident and polished (which is great for them, and I admire them, but probably not 'her'). DD2 is starting in September - we will see if it suits her as well. The open days will give you/your DD a good idea of which schools will suit her. We didn't look around till Y5 though.

Original poster
MarriedDadOneSonOneDaughter · 11/03/2014 18:03

.... Pressed submit too early there!

I want to start going to open days at schools across North, Central and West London. Open to comps, catholic, grammars and indies. Possibly lean towards co-ed but will looks at girls schools too.

Suggestions of schools to put on my open day list welcome.

One condition. To make a recommendation you must have a daughter at that school. Hope that isn't too strict!

Thanks

M1S1D

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