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Original poster

Saturday detention and inflexible school.

216 replies

Rainbow · 11/10/2013 16:28

My DS2 is in Y8 and the school policy is, if they get 5 detentions for not doing homework, they get a Saturday detention. I don't agree with it but it is school policy and I agreed to work with the school for the duration of my child's time with them. DS2 got his 5 detentions and was told on Wednesday(2/10), that he had detention on the Saturday (5/10). As a Cub Scout Leader, I had made arrangements to go to District camp with all the beavers, cubs and scouts from our district. DS1 is a beaver leader DS2 and DS3 are scouts, DS4 is too young but had not choice and my parents and my sis are also leaders with beavers and scouts and so they came too. There was not at home who could look after DS2. I explained to the school that this was the case and after numerous suggestions along the lines of put him on 3 trains and a bus (total journey time 2 hrs 40 mins) it was agreed to postpone the detention to the following week. I got on the coach with all the other leaders and children on the Friday and returned by coach on the Sunday. I then discovered, that DS2's detention had been extended by 1 hour because he could not make the previous Saturday. School seems to be steadfast in their decision and insist on punishing DS2 for my commitment. He did get a couple of Saturday detentions last ear and one was changed as my cousin was getting married but the other 2 we bend over backwards to get him there, even picking up my cubs and taking them to their event before collecting DS2 from camp only to find that the member of staff who was taking the detention had not turned up! Working together is a 2 way street or at least I thought it was!

OP posts:
RussiansOnTheSpree · 11/10/2013 17:19

There seem to be several issues here. Your DS seems unable to keep up with the work. This is one issue. You are completely over committed to scouts (and so it seems are your sons) and you seem to think that scouts is more important than education. It isn't. Also - the school doesn't seem to be noticing that its detention policy is completely ineffective.

NeverKnowinglyUnderstood · 11/10/2013 17:19

when you say you are working with the school it doesn't sound like it at all... it sounds like you are expecting the school to deal with it. without any change from you at all.

I understand about this weekend but really it has got to this point because you are failing to address the problem.

Original poster
Rainbow · 11/10/2013 17:18

Sirzy - he does and on the other nights he does as much as possible.

That is why want it sorted. DS1 was sorted within the first year. It's the "we know best" attitude that seems to be stopping it getting sorted with DS2. Their way isn't working and not just with DS2 but many others but the school won't hear it.

OP posts:
Sirzy · 11/10/2013 17:16

I have 3 other children who don't deserved to be punished for DS2's mistakes

So get your son to pull his socks up then!

Original poster
Rainbow · 11/10/2013 17:14

He's not the first child I have had through Secondary school and it is nt disdain for the school's authority. DS1 went to a different secondary school and had problems with homework and a few other things but his school worked with me as I did them and things were relatively plain sailing once DS1 realised that the school and I worked together. This school open last year and was closer to us. They are refusing to work with but want me to work them. That's the problem I have. I have 3 other children who don't deserved to be punished for DS2's mistakes. He should be not them.

OP posts:
Sirzy · 11/10/2013 17:13

So he can use the other 2 nights to do his homework then.

You seem to be looking for as many reasons as you can why your son isn't managing to do as asked. Its only going to get harder as he gets older so I would get it sorted now.

timidviper · 11/10/2013 17:11

Have you ever thought of giving him some kind of punishment whenever he gets a detention. It would show you are supporting school and may make him improve. So, e.g., each time he gets a detention he is not allowed tv or computer or something you deem appropriate for 1 day, a Saturday could be loss of an outing or a treat.

I think you are giving him very mixed messages by sending him but complaining about it which could cause problems for you with discipline as he gets older.

Original poster
Rainbow · 11/10/2013 17:10

PeterParkersays - Enrichment clubs are straight after school like dance, drama, chess, big band, musical theatre etc Every pupil is expected to sign up to at least 3 a week.

I have suggested that he be allowed to do homework but nothing has changed.

OP posts:
LibraryBook · 11/10/2013 17:09

You seem to have loads of legitimate reasons as to why things can't and won't happen as they should re school. Has it occurred to you your son may have inherited your disdain for the school's authority?

chocoluvva · 11/10/2013 17:08

Well IMO the school is being ridiculously inflexible and their sanctions are not having the desired effect.

SirChenjin · 11/10/2013 17:08

To be fair - if the teacher is supposed to turn up for detention, then he/she should turn up. You can't pick and choose which bits of your job you turn up for.

mercibucket · 11/10/2013 17:07

it sounds like you just need to schedule a once a month saturday detention into the family routine, not such a big deal if you think of it that way, i expect he will get bored of it eventually and start doing the homework

Original poster
Rainbow · 11/10/2013 17:06

Englishteacher78, they have a Saturday detention every weekend. 2 of DS2's friends prefer Saturday detentions to staying at home and so deliberately get them. I find that so sad!

OP posts:
PeterParkerSays · 11/10/2013 17:06

What does "he is expected to go to enrichment clubs" mean in your prev. post OP? Who expects him to? If it was me, I'd tell him that he can't go to enrichment clubs until his homework is up to date - he has to earn the right to attend them.

If the school aren't happy with this, explain that their sanctions - the sit around and twiddle your thumbs detentions - aren't a sufficient deterrent for him so you're taking additional steps to make sure his work gets done.

Please stop being annoyed at the school. no, the teacher didn't turn up to detention - had your son done his work, neither the teacher nor the pupil need have attended.

englishteacher78 · 11/10/2013 17:06

We do volunteer shifts in the library after school. Some students are 'invited' to attend.

SirChenjin · 11/10/2013 17:05

The thing is, they did support you - they changed the date of the detention. I know they added on an additional hour, but I think they have to show that they mean business, otherwise they will have parents giving all sorts of excuses - so maybe that extra hour is a deterrent?

I would second flipchart's suggestion. DS1 was on a report card for a year when he started High School - 6 months at the school's insistence, and the next 6 months at mine because I didn't feel his overall attitude had improved sufficiently. He hated it, but it did work

LittleMissWise · 11/10/2013 17:05

I think it is your DS who is the problem. I think you need to get onside with the school. He is 12, it will be a lot worse when he is 15!

Cynderella · 11/10/2013 17:04

I wish our school would do Saturday detentions - I get fed up with managing them after school. We offer a staffed homework club for those children unable to do the work at home. If they attend every lunchtime and do their best to get work done, the staff sign their planners and teachers give them more time to complete tasks. Most schools open the library and/or other rooms for children who need to complete homework at school.

Original poster
Rainbow · 11/10/2013 17:04

No he can't nfk, I would rather he did but they are not allowed to do anything in detention other than sit there. They get a second detention for talking or having anything in their hands. Doing the missed homework is what I have suggested but no, boredom is the best deterrent
apparently!

OP posts:
englishteacher78 · 11/10/2013 17:04

Saturday detentions are a nightmare! Schools don't dish them out easily. I would have expected him to have to catch up with work in detentions though.

IslaValargeone · 11/10/2013 17:02

The thing is, they have supported you on two previous occasions when they have rescheduled to fit in with your other arrangements.

LIZS · 11/10/2013 17:02

I then try to work with him on as much of the homework as I can why ? You shouldn't need to . He knows he needs to do it and hand it in on time . Sorry but a 5.30 finish doesn't wash with me , mine are that time 2-3 evenings a week and still manage.

Sirzy · 11/10/2013 17:02

you support us and we won't support you

But really if you are not helping ensure homework is done then your not fully supporting them.

Punishment isn't really supposed to be something convenient which you can pick and choose when it happens. The school have shown some flexibility but as a result added to the punishment which seems fair.

nkf · 11/10/2013 17:02

Can't he do the homework? Or does he n8ot.do it?

Original poster
Rainbow · 11/10/2013 17:01

Detention isn't working. He doesn't do his homework, then he gets to sit doing nothing or an hour (an hour less for doing homework) and then he comes home. Homework avoided and an hour for him to relax! I had to explain 6 times that the early detentions for being late of going in and helping in the office were enjoyable for DS2 which is why he was deliberately being late!

OP posts:
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