So we did not get DS1 into any of the Catholic Boys Secondaries, and the reason was the baptism criteria. This will also be the case for ds2

I'm sorry he has been bullied, and obviously you feel very protective of him (quite rightly). There is no more a culture of bullying at Christ's than there is at CV, or at IPS. In any large school there may be bullying, the test of excellent pastoral care is how swiftly and seriously this is dealt with.

Mind you, pay no attention to me as I am just about to send dd to sinky mcsink school .

To be fair, that's not what you said. You said there was a problem with bullying and assaults at the school, which is not the case according to anything I've heard. The school was readily identifiable from what you have posted in various places so I was correcting your misinformation as there may be many people reading this who do not have the benefit of other perspectives on which to base their judgments.

Quint we all want the best for our DC so I'm trying to sympathise and of course you are right, in a perfect world all schools would be equally good, but you have to understand why some people are peeved that you are railing about your DS getting a place at a school they would be more than happy for their children to have a chance of.

Incidentally if your son is sensitive and delicate I don't think CV would have suited him from what my neighbour tells me about it, although her DS has done well there.

MothershipG we are on the 'other side of the street' as it were. We are in catchment to one of the worst performing comps in the country. I've always said that it's not raw results but progress that is the important measure of a schools success. Unfortunately, it falls down by no small amount on both fronts (hence being on Notice to Improve).

If the situation hasn't improved within the next few years we will exercise our democratic right to move house. We are fortunate that we have the means to do so.

YY! Arya You are preaching to the choir with me - I'm so frustrated by this, but I've had this argument on here so many times (and quietly supported Seeker having it a million more times) and some people just don't get it and nothing is going to change...argh!

MY DC are fortunate enough to scrape into the local good enough high school by the skin of their teeth, the next street over and if you don't do god your only option is one of the worse performing schools in the UK. But if you're religious there is plenty of choice.

Sorry, I meant to bold you not strike you out!

Those of you without grammar school options, floggingmolly, have the option of a comprehensive school.

And MothershipG, completely against the original intention of setting up church schools in the first place. Most were originally founded for the education of the poor, who couldn't afford education otherwise.

In our area, there is a very large and very well attended evangelical church. It, without any shadow of a doubt, is largely associated with much of the 'charitable' work that goes on in the town in serving the local area. It runs the food bank, toddler groups exclusively for SEN children and loads of other local support groups.

Ironically, none of its members have any access to the local 'Outstanding' C of E comprehensive which is largely populated by the children of well-informed, white, middle class parents who diligently scour the admission arrangements yearly to ensure they 'tick the boxes' and get themselves onto the electoral roll of the local Anglican Church in order to prove their 'Christianity'.

I'm not sure why the tax paying population should be paying for this.

A couple of years ago the head of the Oxford Diocesan Board of Education suggested that church schools should get back to their original purpose of 'serving the local community' by stopping reserving places for Christian families. His words were quietly ignored by most of the governing bodies of the local VA schools (made up, in large part, by clergy). These schools would claim they 'reserve' no places for church families whilst, on the other hand, using oversubscription criteria that ensure only church families get into such a popular school.

Well Flogging maybe you'll have a little bit of sympathy for those of us without the grammer school options who can't play the religious card either!

I don't blame any parent for doing whatever they can to access the best education for their children but the current system is ridiculous, unfair and unethical.

For those of us without the grammar school options, seeker, it can seem a little bit like that, you know?

And I hardly think not getting into a catholic
school could be described as "screwing your child's future"!

starsatnight, sorry, but that is rubbish, its like saying children who live too far away from the school are being punished for not getting a place because they dont live close enough. when a school is oversubscribed, it is oversubscribed and criteria have to be applied strictly. The alternatives are to either bump another child off the list or to create a place which can cause issues with classroom over crowding and limits of resources.

The most important thing to a child is aware, loving, involved and supportive parents. The school is secondary to that.

Hear hear.

But in fact, as I understand it, the OP has a place at a Christian ethos school which is extremely popular among parents in the local area and which gets very decent results. So I don't really understand why you are so upset, OP. I have never heard anything negative relating to either bullying or assaults about this school in recent years. It was a very different school ten or fifteen years ago, but that's a long time ago in school terms. It was rated good with quite a lot of outstanding features (including achievement and behaviour) not that long ago. I don't have a child there, but I know a lot of people who do. It wouldn't be an option for me when I get to that stage as I prefer non-faith schools but I am in no doubt that it is now doing its job well. Most people would be delighted to be offered a school like this!

At the catholic church service I was at on Sunday the reading was about Jesus intervening to stop a woman being stoned to death for adultery. The priest then discussed the importance of forgiveness and how god and the church forgive sinners who repent.

Clearly however if you break canon law by not getting your child baptised early you will be judged on this transgression 10 years later, no matter how sorry or whether supported by your parish priest.

To me it seems inconsistent. That said there are lots of things about admissions to catholic schools that upset me more like putting in bulge classes at primary level, granting admission to non catholics and then not allowing the siblings in at a later date.

My advice to the op is to get on the waiting lists for catholic schools that dont use this criteria. She may prefer the ethos of these schools in any case.

At the catholic church service I was at on Sunday the reading was about Jesus intervening to stop a woman being stoned to death for adultery. The priest then discussed the im

I am from an Eastern European country (not Poland though). Why we do not baptize children early? It is hard to say, but looking at the history we suffered from Soviet occupation and faith was prohibited. You could not freely admit that you are religious, or you could suffer consequences. So we were deprived of religious customs for a long time and had recreate them after Soviet Union collapsed.

Baptism age is never mentioned or rushed by priests in my country. I wasn't aware of the early baptism clause until I have settled in the UK and became aware of this school admission thing. (admittedly I have never fully read the bible).

Another reason may be that we have a long cold season (autumn/winter) with like -10 or -20 degrees of Celsius and no one wants to "torture" a tiny baby in a cold church.. (and churches are not so well heated as in the UK!) so we rather wait for summer, warm weather, family gathering etc.

Basically, I screwed my DS1's future because I did not know of the early baptism requirement even though I was attending the church. DS1 was baptized when he was 17 months - that was the best timing for many reasons. Had I known, I would have been first in a line to baptize. In a way it is funny - I know few British/Irish parents who rushed to baptize their children at 3 months and never went to church until their child was around 3yo.

The most important thing to a child is aware, loving, involved and supportive parents. The school is secondary to that. And it sounds as if your children have that in spades. So I would just go for the most convenient school - and possibly review the situation after the first year.

prh47bridge Only anecdotally, I do have some connections to the Polish community in Ealing and had heard of this as an issue, but not really one I tuned into TBH. I do remember attending baptisms of older children from Eastern Europe in the community I grew up in, but obviously didn't know the circumstances. There have been other posts from people in similar positions on other threads about schools admissions arrangements. Since OP is applying for a school that serves that community in Ealing, and the diocese are open about the need for that school to serve the needs of that community then clearly it might be useful to investigate under what circumstances they relax the requirement. Certainly locally here we have two Catholic Primary Schools one of which serves a Parish whose priest who will not relax the baptism criteria but will give references following two years of church going whilst in a neighbouring Parish the priest will not provide a reference unless parents have a more solid record of churchgoing throughout their lives unless there is evidence of deprivation or they are from a Catholic country (and for them he is willing to recommend relaxation of the baptism criteria)

Copthallresident - As Tiggytape points out, this is Catholic canon law. It is not something peculiar to the UK. A practising Catholic in any country should know that they are required to get their child baptised within weeks.

Is there any evidence that Catholics in Eastern European countries are ignoring canon law regarding baptism? Or is this just an assumption? Genuine question - I haven't been able to find any data one way or the other.

To be honest, I would have thought that Catholic parents in Eastern European countries were more likely to get children baptised quickly as they are, on the whole, more religious than the UK. But I may be completely wrong on that.

Dials My eldest is at Elthorne - sorry for going OT

CVMS is well known for making the rules up as it goes along, even to the extent of fighting with it's own diocese about it's bending of criteria.

My next door neighbour's oldest son goes there, his younger brother didn't get in because of the new 6 month rule, they took it as far as the Ombudsman with no joy. Give up on CV - you have no chance!

Also the pastoral care in faith schools is not necessarily better, a friend of mine had to move her AS son from his 'christian' primary where he was bullied and got no support from staff to the community school my kids go to where he was happy and had no problems at all for the rest of time in primary.

However I confess I struggle to sympathise with those of you that don't get the faith school you want when lots of non denominational children get a lot less choice!

prh47bridge The issue is that whilst it is custom in this country even for non practising Catholics who are pleasing the family, making sure the baby fits the traditional tiny family Christening gown etc it is not the custom in other countries, particularly Eastern European countries and that some of the schools seem to be more flexible about exemptions than others.