Girls school vs. mixed? Which would you choose?

Personally I prefer mixed schools, and have never seen this supposed gender bias on science and maths (have A Levels in them and a degree and was never told they were

I absolutely agree that different schools will suit different children.

TBH, I suspect for most parents/children, its a matter of choosing from a very small no. of options. I went to the girls' school because the usual school my primary fed to was full that year, my parents weren't religious, and I wasn't a boy; that narrowed the options to two - and the other fed 95% from its sister primary.

Ditto with dd; she has the option of Welsh language (mixed) or English language (mixed), and that's it.

So I guess all these conversations have to assume that there is actually a genuine choice between a good mixed school & a good single sex one, so I imagine is really only relevant for people in large towns/cities.

Thing is Takver it wasn't by chance that I had a good experience at a large, mixed, academically focused comp. It was clear from before I went that a child like me should do well at a school like that. There is no 'average school' exemplifying all national statistics. There are good schools and crap schools of all sorts and schools that suit or do not suit a particular child. The point must be to assess and ask questions of the particular school.

I know women who went to girls' schools that were more focused on social exclusivity and, essentially, turning out nice, marriagable young ladies, than on academic standards. They were ill-equipped to thrive at university and lack confidence as a result. That, surely, is treating girls as a second sex.

My school had its quirks. Former grammar school teachers operated informal elites and while academic children thrived, competent middle-ability ones may not have done. Woodwork or design weren't subjects that anyone expecting to do A-levels would have taken for example, so snobbery rather than sexism prevailed.

A point I always end up at in discussions on education is that the peer group is enormously important, creating a culture at least as strong as the school's own. Large schools host multiple peer groups. Who is your dd friends with and where will they go? Who is she likely to become friends with at other schools? What are their values? Those are questions I'd be thinking about.

I wonder iof the proportions would have been the same if she was asking about her son.

I have boys at single sex school so yes :)

We might have thought differently if we'd had a son - DH went to an all-boys school and didn't rate the experience. Although the best schools academically round here are single sex, be it state or private, so maybe we'd have used them - they are paired with girls' schools unlike his.

my answer would have been the same.

Wow, I am truly amazed how many people think single sex. I wonder iof the proportions would have been the same if she was asking about her son.

My DD1 has just started at a single sex school. It was by far our favourite school. I do like the fact that subjects are not thought of as boys subjects and girls subjects especially as DD's interests are in Science and Maths.
At the moment she is happy to be without boys, may change in a few years!

As I said above, I have three at three different schools. People do comment on it, but it seems to be a complete non-issue to me. They all get themselves there. I suppose I can't hand down uniform.

But then I only went to the same school as my younger brother for a couple of terms when he started school, and when I joined his school for sixth form, so it's not something that seems automatic to me.

My brother & I went to different (obviously!) single sex schools & my sister another girls' school. I have four children & I don't think any of them will end up at the same school.

Single sex DEFINITELY. I went to one and it was great until they let boys come in the sixth form (all the girls got competitive and it wasnt fun anymore and we got less learning done)

For those posters whose kids go to single-sex schools, does anyone have a boy and a girl? What's it like having them at different schools?

I have two boys at a single sex secondary school. DD is still in Primary and I envisage having her in a different secondary to the middle boy will be no worse than it is now - better as she will be independent. DS1 will have left for Uni when she starts [wail] so I'll have 3 in 3 different places :)

I am thinking I will end up with DC at 3 different secondaries simultaneously, too; I envision hassle in keeping track of transport arrangements & policy differences, timetable variations, big variations in who to talk to about any queries & variable GCSE schedules (but those evolve constantly anyway!). Harder to remember names of their teachers, too.

"I have a DD and a DS, and our city has both excellent single-sex state schools and an excellent mixed state school. I like the idea of them both going to the same school, not travelling to different parts of the city to go to single-sex schools. "

My brother and I went to different, single-sex schools. Some of the journey was along the same route, but we never ever deliberately chose the same bus or sat next to each other on the bus, and only rarely acknowledged each other! A bit of freedom from your sibling can be nice.

curls it's fine. Obviously the logistics are more difficult than when they attended the same prep school. But not too bad as they both get the bus. Just a different bus.

Yes. I have a boy and a girl.
I had three children at three different schools.

Having been at school with my siblings it didn't bother me or them to go separately. It is pretty normal tbh. Many of dds friends have a brother in a local boys school

For those posters whose kids go to single-sex schools, does anyone have a boy and a girl? What's it like having them at different schools?

I have a DD and a DS, and our city has both excellent single-sex state schools and an excellent mixed state school. I like the idea of them both going to the same school, not travelling to different parts of the city to go to single-sex schools. But am I being selfish, and not thinking of what's best for each individual child?

For me, having one in all girls and one in all boys, the culture in each is very different. The style of teaching and discipline.

The strict policies of DS school are simply not needed at DD's school. And the high level of pastoral care at DD's school isn't needed at DS's.

Now obvioulsy this simply would not work for some DC. Some girls would need the stricter regimen. Some boys would require more hands on pastoral work. No school works for everyone. But if it hits the spot, as it has done with mine, it is a thing og joy.

Sorry, another example I can think of; dd is very keen on woodwork, craft etc. When we were looking round secondary schools, I asked how many girls took 'resistant materials' GCSE (incorporates woodwork, metalwork etc. All the students demonstrating seemed to be boys, hence why I asked the question. The answer in both the schools we visited was very very few - none at all that year in the second school (they also had zero girls taking A level electronics, and a very small %ge in physics). One school the teacher was 'that's a very good question, we don't really think about it, but maybe we should' - the other 'well, its not really a subject that girls like, is it'.

"Btw, my own experience of 'boys as attention hoggers or a distraction' was that third year (13-14) was a bit blighted by a few poorly behaved pubescent boys taking up a lot of teachers' attention. "

I felt just the same at 11 and so was delighted to go to a girls' secondary school.

Ok. I see what you mean iijkk.

I think issues such a discipline was structure were the same as in his mixed school. The difference was in the exaggerated focus upon stereotypical gender roles. Namely the boys being smart arse class clowns and the girls being very good and neat whilst giggling and mooning over the smart arse boys.

But that was his experience in just two schools.

lottie, I think it is fantastic that your experience of mixed school was so positive. Unfortunately I think statistics like the one we've seen about the small number of girls opting for physics - and the fact that girls in single sex schools are much more likely to choose the subject - show that this isn't the case everywhere.

Certainly even in reception at dd's school you could see the differentiation between girls and boys, with boys dominating the construction toys, and girls the 'home corner'. Its not so explicit now she's higher up the school, but I still see different treatment of boys vs girls. Admittedly this is a very rural area, so hopefully bigger urban schools are more forward thinking.

Sporty or geeky didn't cross my mind, I was thinking of things like routine, structure, strict discipline, boundaries, role models: aspects of teaching style, discipline & institutional character. Which... curiously, I don't think anyone has commented on as possible differences. And yet, the Girl's school we visited was in some ways extremely girly in atmosphere, in my mind.

Hmm, I think the match of school culture and peer group, and child personality are probably the most important thing and lots of posts illustrate that.

For me an academically focused mixed school was a good match. The things I imagine I'd have benefited from at a girls' school would have been about it possibly being smaller and supportive on a more individual level, not the absence of boys. My school wouldn't have been so great for a very sporty or musical child. Those activities happened but were a bit marginal.

A mixed school where everyone was obsessed about appearance, boyfriends and social hierarchy, or a ss school with similar preoccupation would have been dire.

I find the second sex comment quite funny (though understand it is a sincere point with a reasoned basis), as we were never second class in a mixed school. Actually we obtained confidence that we could compete and assert ourselves quite easily without any special treatment, which set us up to challenge anything else. The opposite of needing to be protected from the travails of mixed life, I think.

Just another thought but generally, I think mixed schools mitigate against bullying, as there isn't the homogenous culture necessary to support it, the opposite sex will find the behaviour absurd and may mock the bullies.