Do you think dc need you more/less/the same now they're secondary age?

I am a sahm also, with 2 teenagers and one younger child. I agree that older children's problems are much bigger and harder to help them with, and they also need lots of practical help with their activities. However, I think (this is what I am struggling with at the moment) they need parents with rich and interesting lives of their own, whether that means paid employment or not. The danger for me is that I could focus too much attention on my children and that puts pressure on them to somehow provide me with a life. This is just my personal experience.
I feel that young children thrive with a lot of parental attention, and my older ones need a bit more of an example of a happy, self-sufficient, fulfilled mother, who is interested in everything they do, but doesn't always have time to give them rides and help with their homework. I also feel that my children's teen years are the time when my personal struggles, (whether with depression, lack of direction, or anything else), run the risk of harming my children. As a result, the pressure is on me to deal with any problems of my own in the best possible way, because I will affect them as well as myself.

For me, the question is: am I happy and fulfilled ?(Of course, nothing's perfect.) I think I would be better off right now if I had more of a life outside my family, and that would be better for my children. You may already have your own life and not need paid employment, in which case don't worry about anyone else's opinion.

I think some view sahm families as being a luxury there are so many ways that a sahm makes a difference to the whole family well-being but I'm not going to debate it. It depends what is going on in life but on the whole I think a sahm/sahd is just as valuable at secondary school age and from what I have heard from friends then right up to leaving school and then going out into work/uni if they are in the same area.

I think the answer , certainly in my experience, is that they do need you more for the first term or two while they're settling in, but then they spread their wings, they go to afterschool clubs, they're out with their friends round town at the weekend etc and they need you much less.

I would personally expect SAHMs to start working when their kids go to primary, not secondary tbh.

But I do know what you mean, when ds started yr7 he found it tough for the first couple of terms and it was good to be able to talk to him when he got in form school (have always worked pt so around from 3.30).

Having said that, I don't think it necessary for the mum to not go to work simply because the child needs to debrief for half an hour after scholl. There is plenty of other time to chat, while making dinner together, washing up together, in the evening and at weekends.