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Original poster

Safety at Sceondary school - What can I do?

33 replies

CardyMow · 14/09/2011 17:05

Today at my DD's school, one of the girls in her class beat up another girl, quite severely. To the point where the victim could not breathe, and an ambulance was called, and the girl taken away on a stretcher - this isn't just my DD telling me, I'm close friends with one of the mid-day assistants, and she told me before my DD did.

The police were also called by the school. The thing is, this girl attacked my DD in the lunch hall last year, she strangled my DD for 'looking at her funny'. The school persuaded me not to call the police by putting this girl in Isolation for two weeks. She has also 'tripped up' my DD on numerous occasions, to the point where my DD has had bruised shins etc.

Today's incident happened on the school field - but the Mid-day assistants did not get there in time to prevent the victim from getting seriously hurt. I am worried that after a few weeks, this girl will be allowed back into the main population of the school again, and I fear that they cannot guarantee the safety of the other pupils, my DD included, while this girl is attending the school.

I cannot take my DD out of the school - there is not another secondary in our town with spaces in this year group, some pupils in DD's year have been sent out of County for secondary, as it's such a large year group.

I do not know what to do, as I do not feel safe sending my DD to school while this girl is on the school site. How do I go about talking to the school to tell them I want them to either GUARANTEE my DD is at no risk from this girl, or to permanently exclude this girl? In today's incident, this girl punched the other in the chest - if she did that to my DD, who has a heart problem, she could KILL my DD. Hence my worry. I don't feel that a short-term exclusion will help, as this girl has had many many of them, and her violence is escalating.

Apparently, today's incident was because the violent girl believed that her victim had been 'dissing her family'. So her reaction is very excessive for the victim's 'percieved' crime.

I feel scared that the same thing will happen to my DD. I moved my DD's primary school when she was 6yo because this girl attacked her with a pair of scissors, and the school refused to exclede her or even keep her in at breaktimes, and despite moving to the other side of my town, they have ended up at the same secondary school. In the same sets, as violent girl has no interest in learning, and my DD has SEN.

Help me, I'm scared my DD will end up in hospital or worse. What do I do??

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RoseC · 15/09/2011 20:56

That's shockingly poor on behalf of the school.

I would strongly suggest that you try and, in addition to the letter, at least get a meeting with the Chair of Governors. Emphasise that they have a responsibility to your DD and the other students this girl has targeted, who outnumber her so they should be doing the best for the majority.

When she is isolated will she be having her breaks at a different time to the other students? This is a small step which they should easily be able to accommodate and it gives your DD some breathing space whilst you press for something permanent.

Who did you speak to at the school?

Original poster
CardyMow · 15/09/2011 20:08

I'm going to write a letter because when I phoned the school, they said they could not discuss this girl with me, due to data protection, unless the girl's MOTHER agreed, and the girl and her mother, me AND my DD were there. Yeah, THAT'LL help?!

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Original poster
CardyMow · 15/09/2011 20:07

So, what DD has told me is that the girl spent 6 hrs in a police cell (this girl's twin brother is also in DD's form class, not as violent as his sister). She is being excluded for 5 days, and will be in isolation for 'a while'. THIS is all they do? The girl who was attacked is out of hospital, has VERY bad bruising on her neck, is on very strong painkillers, will be back at school on MOnday apparently.

HOW is this enough??!! WT actual F??!! Am going to write a letter asking whether my DD will be safe. I have no paperwork over the last incident - was dealt with over the phone. And the paperwork from when DD was 6yo has been lost in the 5 housemoves in the last 7 years! So no personal written 'proof'.

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RoseC · 15/09/2011 09:02

Just spoken to DF who has been a school governor for eleven years at my old (now outstanding) school and is up-to-date with policies.

He suggests you arrange separate meetings with the HT, the Chair of Governors and the SENCO to both put your case forward about your fears for DD and also to ask them what they will be doing. He says if you have separate meetings then the HT doesn't know what you are saying to the Chair and cannot talk over you/airbrush anything. Seems like a good plan since they've been so rubbish previously. If you have any paperwork about the previous incidents you might like to take it with you.

He's confirmed it's the cost of excluding that is likely stopping them. His school is successful and still has money difficulties - it's likely yours is no different. He also said that if a child is in care/has social services involvement it is exceptionally difficult to exclude them. You cannot, as an individual, make them move the bully to the other school but you can present your case in the strongest possible terms - forcing their hand.

If you get no joy with the school then complain to Ofsted. DF says they should be having some kind of governor's meeting about yesterday - maybe give them two weeks (mention it in your letter?) to arrange some kind of plan and then complain.

The other thing he suggested, if you haven't done it already, is to get copies of the exclusion, safeguarding and SEN policies for the school. They are available on request. I think some schools put them online - his keeps hard copies in the school library for parents to look at. They have to give them to you.

Whatever you choose to do, I hope you get the best outcome.

RoseC · 15/09/2011 08:40

You could use the phrase 'in confidence' when you write the letter. This should mean that they only show it to the necessary parties.

In fact, since the case is so severe, it would be fine to put: I would like this letter to be treated with the strictest confidence. It is a significant concern to me that, should [bully] find out I have complained, she will make my daughter an immediate target.

mummytime · 15/09/2011 06:34

Okay. In your situation I would talk to my DD, and find out if this girl has be bothering her, paying any kind o attention to her recently.
I would also get my DD to keep a diary of any bullying that happens. I would also write to the police to inform them of the event that happened with your DD last year.

Finally you may well be able to get a place at another school in your town, if you really wanted, on appeal. It doesn't matter that they are full, appeal can force them to tak an extra pupil and bullying and safety are strong concerns for an appeal.

But if it is the best school, I would probably write to the Chair of governors and tell them about the previous incident. If the girl is excluded, then almost certainly one of the other schools in your town will be forced to take her (even if they are full). However if the school has not taken steps to start the long road to exclussion in place yet, they could be delayed in doing so now.

The phrase you want to use in your letters is to ask "how is the school safeguarding the well being" of your daughter. You could also forward any letters to OFSTED, and tell them you are, just to make sure this is not swept under the carpet.

Original poster
CardyMow · 14/09/2011 23:36

Ah, so maybe a possibility. Bloody hope so. I'm just so worried that if they let this girl back into the school, it'll be my DD targetted next. If I contacted the school, would they be allowed to tell this girl or her mother (who would tell the girl) that it was me (as in my DD's mum) who had writted a letter? Because if so, and then she is allowed back into the school, won't that just basically paint a target on my DD?

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cricketballs · 14/09/2011 23:07

all colleges have course to suit 14-16 year olds (they get more funding for this) they just don't advertise it!

In terms of places at other schools (I am currently commenting on another thread regarding appeals) unfortunately, when it comes down to admittance of another student (especially in these circumstances) if a school has capacity in their general numbers, they can not say no to a managed transfer.... (believe me, as a HoY in a full year group, but the school has general capacity in other year groups I have had to accommodate a managed transfer into my year)

Original poster
CardyMow · 14/09/2011 23:02

There are no colleges in our town that accept children under 16yo.

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Original poster
CardyMow · 14/09/2011 23:01

I doubt there will be a place at another mainstream school in our town in this year group. The only spaces are at the PRU locally.

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cricketballs · 14/09/2011 22:56

they can lose their outstanding rating as can the LA. What I would imagine they would try to do is a managed move rather than exclude.

Any help the school drafts in massive cost the school, even if there is a move to a PRU/college course etc therefore most schools will try to facilitate a managed move to another school (which is in the LA's best interests as they have less excluded students on their data as well)

RoseC · 14/09/2011 22:54

It might be a reason why... my DF is a governor, I'll ask him tomorrow about what they can and cannot do. I know his school have excluded someone in the last two years but have been rated 'outstanding features' and 'outstanding' in 2010 and 2011 respectively.

If you want the urgency of the email but the seriousness of a letter (I always prefer a letter) could you get DD to drop it into the school office tomorrow morning? TBH I imagine if the school is any good the governors will be having some kind of emergency meeting in the next two days anyway.

Original poster
CardyMow · 14/09/2011 22:44

Erm - because I am a lone parent with 4dc, one is only 7.5mo, and I am at work?? For minimum wage, so I can't afford tutors?? Nailak, I just do not have the money, if I did, I would HE, it's something I have considered for years, but I can't give up work to do so, can I??

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nailak · 14/09/2011 22:37

erm, why cant you home school? or use private tutors etc

Original poster
CardyMow · 14/09/2011 22:32

School is rated Outstanding on Ofsted - will they be at risk of losing that if they exclude this girl then? Because the HT will do ANYTHING not to lose the Ofsted outstanding (only two Secondaries in whole town are outstanding, this is one). Would that be why they keep putting the girl in Isolation rather than kicking her out?

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cricketballs · 14/09/2011 22:24

Let me jsut rant before I offer any advice!

unfortunately this type of incident is the long result of the downgrading any school/LA gets from OFSTED if they exclude a pupil (no matter how bad the incident) and the many appeals from parents once their child is excluded.

rant over Grin

I would second the letter (but would send as an email as the urgency of the issue needs also to be confronted) to the CoG, but also send a copy to the Head and to the education department of the LA

CeliaFate · 14/09/2011 21:11

Contact your dd's head of year, the school headteacher, the chair of governors and tell them what you said in your op.

If enough parents complain in the strongest terms they will have to do something.

Talker2010 · 14/09/2011 21:03

Prior to contacting the governors you should contact the head

The school will have a complaints procedure which will state that governors are the port of call after the head

If you feel that is not going to have the impact you need then write to the head and cc the chair of governors

FagButt · 14/09/2011 20:12

I doubt she will be in school tomorrow.

Please update when you hear something. If she has been known to social services, i think things will happen.

She may be referred to a PRU.

Original poster
CardyMow · 14/09/2011 18:26

The police were called by the school, the violent girl ran off the school field after the assault, while the mid-day assistants were busy checking on the victim and calling an ambulance for the victim. Social services have been involved with this violent girl's family for YEARS (since they were at school nursery, definately). Obviously hasn't done much good. Hmm.

I think the letter is a good place to start.

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CustardCake · 14/09/2011 18:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

RoseC · 14/09/2011 18:07

How awful. I know at our school she would be expelled... it may be that the parents of the victim will insist on appropriate exclusion. My cousin was (rightfully) expelled twice for violent/disruptive behaviour (although hasn't yet put someone in hospital. He was 12 and went to a special school for disruptive children.

How about this as a starting point for the letter:

Dear [Chair of Governors]

I would like to express my concern about my daughter's safety in school following the incident with [bully] today.

[Bully] has a history of violent and bullying behaviour towards [daughter], both at primary and secondary school, which has been discussed with [headteacher] before and included an instance of strangulation last year resulting in a two week exclusion for [bully]. Given the escalation in [bully]'s behaviour, the failure of the school to protect [victim] and my daughter's existing heart condition I am extremely apprehensive about her sharing lessons and break times with this student.

I would like your firm assurance that [daughter] will not be at risk from [bully] on school property. This is in line with your [include school policy on bullying/protection of children?].

I look forward to receiving your reply within ten working days [this gives them time to have an emergency gov's meeting].

Yours sincerely,

HuntyCat

If you want to keep your DD home if the bully goes back into school you should put that in this letter as well - didn't want to put words in your mouth though :)

Original poster
CardyMow · 14/09/2011 17:26

What would be the likely outcome if they did press charges? Because I can't see them locking a 13yo up? So surely that would mean that at some point she will be back at school?

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Original poster
CardyMow · 14/09/2011 17:24

The violent girl is also 13yo. They've all just started Y9. I really hope they press charges.

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FagButt · 14/09/2011 17:21

How old is this girl. If she has assaulted the other pupil and they want to press charges, they will be quite within their rights to do so.

It would be interesting to see what the victims family decide to do about it all.

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