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How can I persuade ds (12) that the little things matter?

31 replies

schroeder · 22/06/2011 11:59

ds is ridiculously lazy in his school work, he can't be bothered to underline his titles, use capital letters or to rough things out first. As a result his work looks sloppy and messy, no matter that the content is good, he is letting himself down.

He thinks I'm over fussy and it doesn't matter, I think he's losing marks that he could easily get just by checking his work and picking up a ruler etc.

He has been moved into lower sets at school in about 5 subjects already, I do not go on about his school work all the time, I don't want to end up in the position where I am standing over him every night, but maybe I need to get more involved?

What do you think?

It does not help that he is quite difficult to talk to right now having metamorphosed into a teenager already, he is grumpy, sensitive and selfish.

I know this sound very negative, but really he is a lovely bright boy whom I adore and it breaks my heart that he is struggling, because I know how well he can do. His creative writing especially is fantastic, I've been looking in his english book and it's beautiful, he also draws very well. This seems to make it worse for me-that his teachers might not see his potential hidden behind the slapdash presentation.

OP posts:
schroeder · 22/06/2011 14:11

Well I have just talked to his form teacher (he is being monitored by him because of ds being 'below target' in a few subjects)

Anyway he sees ds's presentation issues as being all part of his dashing off the bare minimum every time, for his homework.

So I have decided to sit down with him every night, to do his homework and make sure he does his best.

He will hate it! he will shout and slam doors, but I cannot just let him drift along getting more and more behind.

OP posts:
MRSJWRTWR · 22/06/2011 12:44

I would also suggest talking to his teachers regarding slipping into lower sets.

DS1 turned 12 in May and this sounds just like him with regard to sloppy presentation and he is utterly astounded when I suggest tidying his work up, checking spellings, capital letters, underlining headings etc.

I was nervously awaiting the results of his end of year exams (was actually worried whether they'd be able to read his papers!) and on the whole he has done really well and also continues to get good marks for his homework. So the teachers are obviously looking beyond the state of his written work.

mummytime · 22/06/2011 12:38

I would arrange a proper meeting with the school. It is not right if he is being moved into lower sets just for not underlining. However I would suspect the issues are probably greater, and you need to know exactly what is going on.

BTW I knew a boy be moved into the bottom set because of his attitude, as part of his attitude came from him finding the work easy, this did not help.

bigTillyMint · 22/06/2011 12:06

Sounds pretty typical for a 12 yo boy!

I would be very worried if he has been moved down because of presentation, but maybe he needs a bit more support to get his work looking better.

SarkySpanner · 22/06/2011 12:01

I would speak to his teacher(s) to see if this really is the main issue to be tackling.

c0rn551Lk · 22/06/2011 12:00

I feel his pain. Is he better when he word processes?