Do we let dd audition for ballet school or not?

i think that if she is not utterly obsessed or has been spotted as a rare talent i would not even start it. tbh, the school may offer her a place even if she is not top flight. the life is utterly intense and if you are not top flight it must be pretty grim always being an also ran.
i had a friend who had this experience at 11. her parents could just afford the fees. she lasted one term and hated it- in fact she never put on a leotard again. she was lucky in some ways in that she just slotted back into the local school- it sounds like you are in a spot where competition is far greater.

Tough call, and have faced a similar dilema with music school

I'd say, take it one step at a time. Enter her for the audition and prepare her. Take the audition, see what happens. If she's offered a place, then you have to think it through.

But there are lots of other ways to increase her dance contact - checchiti, English Youth Ballet, other companies - all without going to dance school at huge cost. But when its right, its right.

What is there to lose by letting her audition (except the cost of the application), if you think she'll be OK if she doesn't get a place?

To put it into perspective, the other privates you're considering will cost around 4500 per term for tuition, then add on all the extras. If she went to St H then you'd be looking at around 40 mins each way from your area as the traffic is awful Pinner to Northwood direction in the morning (can be sticky even taking the back roads) - regardless of whether you drove her yourself or put her on the school bus.

I agree with the PP that we hear lots of stories about dance schools, but you can only cross one bridge at a time, and you seem like a sensible person, whois giving their DD lots of options for secondary, so go with your instinct!

I would be looking for a school where you can qualify for MDS as the thresholds are high - around £150k per annum.

I am very much of the opinion if someone has a non-academic talent then it should be pursued. Academic education will not go by the wayside and one can always study at a later date. Sister went to ballet school after a professional career of 10 years then went to study Medicine at 30.

In saying that my one concern would be the self-esteem and competitive culture at dance schools which could lead to depression or an eating disorder. Is your daugther emotionally secure to deal with this? If she is a perfectionist then I would avoid such a place. She will also enter an environment where she is no longer the best which may also add to any pressure.

You can get some advice on ballet.co.uk in the Doing Dance forum

if you can afford it, let her audition and let her go if she's good enough. Make sure you get her to sit for normal schools and maybe see if you can get her taster days at some so she would know what she was missing. Then let her make the choice. If you can't afford it, just explain that to her. my kids know that some thiings are just beyond our reach because of money and that's all there is to it. But it seems wrong to crush a child's dreams if money's no object, and if after a couple of years she decided it wasn't for her she could still move back to a normal school closer to home

Most serious children who don't go to vocational school would not be dancing once or twice a week. They would be 2 or 3 times a week at their dance school plus JA's plus any performance companies they joined.

Don't be put off by boarding this is an old chestnut on MNT and generates nearly as many hysterical postings as mentioning the word Eton! Many children board from 11 and love it especially if she's doing something she loves. I know nothing about ballet but my friend was told it was age 11 or never. By 16 having been in a normal school and only been dancing once maybe twice a week she would have missed the boat but then that was the Royal Ballet.

Are you able to say which school it is? Is she currently a JA?

I have been looking around for dd but she isn;t good enough for classical ballet and fees/logisitcs for musical theatre/drama are unrealistic for us. Hammond looks good but doing the drama strand incudes little or no dance/voice and dd wants all three.

I wouldn't do it iiwy. I wouldn't want my dd boarding at that age and as confidence says the logistics of it make a day place seem impossible. (Also I wouldn't have the money for fees, but maybe you do.)

There are other options for full-time ballet school at age 16+ if she continues to be so determined.

nooooo. You can't say that she is not being allowed to try because mummy & daddy don't rate her!
Let her try, on the understanding that competition is fierce and she may not get in but all kudos to her for trying. Google some Thomas Edison quotes on try.try and try again. Or tell her about Robert the Bruce and his spider.

It may be useful for 11+ preparation and make her realise that there are plenty other above-average kids out there and she needs to raise her game. Or it may totally destroy any self-confidence. Only you know how she will react.

Have you asked her ballet teacher what are her chances. Years ago a friend was spotted by her ballet teacher and and Royal Ballet and offered a place and they'd pay the fees and her father would not let her go - she never got over it. A few years later I went to watch her at a lesson and she was a million times better than all the others - it was obvious why the Royal Ballet wanted her is your daughter that good?
If you are not going to let you daughter go even if she is offered a place then dont let her go for the audition is cruel.
As a last pont I beleive the Royal Ballet provides an excellent all round ed not just ballet.

Not vomit! Hate predict text. Cannot enter.

I don't think she should audition at a school where she cannot vomit she passes - unless she is happy to do it for experience.

I would, however, look at options available that might workmfor
you and her and let her audition for those (maybe, as I said, using this one for experience of the audition process).

Have you looked at the Music & Dance Scheme? The Royal Ballet School in London plus a couple of others elsewhere in the country have very high "nominal" fees, but are heavily subsidised by the government so that entrants only pay a proportion of those on a sliding scale relative to income. Of course outside of the unlikely event that one of these is on your doorstep, it would probably involve boarding.

Is she exceptionally able, as well as single-mindedly obsessed? Is she immovably focussed on ballet, as opposed to dance in general? If the answer to all these questions is yes, then you probably need to do what you can to provide what she needs. I must admit I couldn't see how to do two 80 minute round trips a day with two other kids though!

If not, then I'd avoid it and just provide what you can around normal school. The few ballet dancers who get through the gruelling training to even enter the profession get paid a pittance and are over the hill at 35. It's not worth thinking about unless the drive and ability are so strong that it's impossible to consider any alternative.

I'm likely to be in a similar situation in a few years with my DD who is obsessive about music. But even that has a wider range of realistic options and opportunities than ballet.