Angry with DS for quitting 6thForm but want to be supportive .

that was me. my mother was utterly gutted. i was the one out of 4 of us who didn't do A levels or go to universiy. I just hated it, mostly because i didn't know what i wanted to do. so I worked a bit, did a bit of voluntary work, worked a bit more, had a year off then went back and did a BTEC diploma over 2 years, then worked some more.

since then I've gone back and done 2 degrees and have a career i really want to do. i've done so much better that i would have had i gone down the conventional A levels and university at 18 route., because i wanted to do it.

gingeroots Have you taken a look at agricultural colleges?

www.harper-adams.ac.uk/

rac.ac.uk/

www.aber.ac.uk/en/ibers/

I did a National Diploma in Agriculture. I left school after GCSEs and spent a year getting practical experience before going to college. Those that had achieved certain grades at A level did a Higher National Diploma. Both were 3 year sandwich courses at the time. I don't know how it works now. Hth.

I dropped out of sixth form. I wasn't doing brilliantly and the regimentation and pointless rules of school were bugging the hell out of me - a course I really wanted to do was stopped half-way through, I had to spend endless hours in school even if I didn't have lessons etc etc etc.

I then spent a few months working for a local shop then got on a YTS (if you remember them) course that turned out to be a part-time college course in IT with a qualification at the end, split with working in the IT department of a large corporate.

It worked out very, very well for me. I revelled in the greater freedom and responsibility of college compared to school. Once the course was finished, the company I was placed with offered me a full-time job and that then evolved into a very good career in IT.

In hindsight, dropping out of sixth form was a big risk and it must've worried my mother immensely. But it forced me to stand on my own two feet and find something that worked for me.

I've just realised. He has the offer for a place this Sep/Oct to do a degree at £3,000pa. And we are suggesting that he has a gap year and does his degree in the future at £9000pa ...
Perhaps he should just go for it.

Are you absolutely sure about the offer? People are tripping over themselves trying to get in under the old fee structure. I'm sure that the CI doesn't need to do anyone any favours this year and make soft offers.

At least if you make them CF you can get on with sorting out accomodation.

Does he know much about the course he is going to be doing ( you say you don't, but does he?) Setting up for three years study on a
Course you don't know much about is worrying and he should look into it in more detail.

That is what happened with me and my BTEC - I did it because I didn't want to do A levels and it seemed to play to my strenghs. It was a complete success but I see many people drop out first year, so it doesn't work for all. Best for him to spend time investigating if it right for him.

It seems a pity he won't just face the next month or two and 'do his best' -'if you get worse results do you lose the original higher ones?

It sounds like he needs careers advice.
He won't be able to get an apprenticeship for just a few months and they are very very rare in animal care anyway. It would take minimum of a year to get a qualification equivalent to GCSEs - level 2. There seem to be currently 13 vacancies across the whole country.
www.apprenticeships.org.uk/Types-of-Apprenticeships/Agriculture-Horticulture-and-Animal-Care/Animal-Care.aspx
(Follow link on the right to take you to vacancies.)
It is possible but getting an apprenticeship is really hard work and can take a long time. Pay is low, below normal min wage.

If he wants to do the foundation year it sounds like voluntary work is a good idea, the local careers service might be able to tell you which local places are happy to take on young people for work experience. Plus it might be helpful for DS to talk to another adult to take some pressure off you. There should be a careers adviser attached to his school. If not try here:
www2.cxdirect.com/home.htm
I find it wierd the school haven't offered him any support about what to do next.

I think the boy needs a break. 3 years in the 6th form and still struggling shouts - this is not for me.

Look into gap year placements maybe in Africa on a reservation or similar

When he comes back he will have a better idea of what direction he wants to head in. He will be that much older and more mature and if he is going to go back into studying I think a vocational course such as animal management might be more suitable, ideally somewhere that runs courses which are split between college and a work placement.

I'm going to be harsh here.
If he can't take the pressure at A Level and would rather give up then I don't think that a degree is such a bright idea. Is he going to take on thousands of pounds of tuition fee and accommodation debt, only to give up again in the first few months?
I think leaving the degree for a few years until he has matured a bit might be the way forward.

Ginger roots, I think you did the right thing . Under pressure people don't see or think clearly and giving up (or not) is best done after thought and due consideration and not when burdened and in tears.

He doesn't want to do his A2s, why are you still trying to persuade him?
Baffled, really. He's clearly unhappy, has cried about this, and you're still trying to get him to do this.
I think you need to back off and let him make his own choices.

www.est.uk.com/ - for more information on apprenticeships if that helps.

Its hard Ginger, I know. DD1 struggled through one year of 6th form, never really settling and hating it, then decided to move to a college instead, where she gave up after the first term. I was so worried about her future, but she did an apprenticeship, (rubbish money but she enjoyed the work), has now got a "proper" job, and is doing an accountancy course aswell. It was just not right for her a few years ago, but now she is loving the learning and doing really well.

Have you looked into any apprenticeships? These are hands on and he might enjoy doing one for a year. They do childcare ones, not sure about animal care though, but worth a look.

Dont worry, he will come out fine. Not all young people are the same and need the same route to get to their career choice.

I second the Btech idea....it would be fresh start.

Most of dh's old schoolfriends are brick'ies and tilers. Most of them are millionaires. One of them owns 12 houses. And has no mortgage. Exams results are not the only think in life. But it does sure HELP, if you have some sort of idea. And well paid, jobs, choices, is ONE of the very key issues.

We all feel your pain. Part of me would probably want to strangle him, and tell him to grow up, but I fear that would not be helpful.
Along with not being very mature, he also sounds a bit 'lost'.
I mean its all very well if you realise you want to be an ... architect at age 13, but if like me you didn't have a clue, even whilst doing a'levels, you are kind of scuppered.
Maybe one of those online career things. My friend told about 2 that were very good. Really took onboard what your personality is etc, what you want out of life. No point killing yourself to be a barrister, if what you really want is babies/travel/easy ride of life.
Xenia would say you do need to think about the money, where this is going to take you in life. I agree. Teenagers career advice today seems even more abysmal than mine was !

I really feel for you, but with the exams only a few weeks away now, would your DS consider taking just 1 A2 in the subject he enjoys most (poss Biology from your post)?

I would echo belle and ask if he (or even better both of you) can see the head of pastoral care to talk through his options. It would be such a shame to stop now after 3 years hard work.

It is clear he's going through a difficult stage of his life. Some people are just not cut out for academic studies; I hasten to add this does not imply they are thick or dim. I have a few friends like this and they became millionaires before the age of 30! On the contrary, sometimes these individuals have a clear insight in what they want to do in life and make a great success of it and that A-Levels and universities are not the only path to get there. For example, I've read and just confirmed again by the man himself recently in a Piers Morgan interview that Lord Andrew Lloyd-Webber spent a very brief period at Oxford and very quickly decided Oxford wasn't for him and wouldn't help him in what he actually wanted to do. His track record today speaks for itself.

Does your DS know what he wants to do? It seems to me he had opted for some very hard academic science subjects and the fact is that if he's struggling at AS and A2 levels now, pursuing the same subjects at university would be nothing short of 3 or 4 years of hell at university. A break from academia e.g. a gap year (extended foreign holiday/work experience) may help matters immensely. But both of you need to be open and discuss the issue(s) with a cool head. Good luck!

Like Vivalabeaver, I also didn't do A levels but BTEC in Business and Finance. Hard work but in a very different and more vocational way. I never wanted to go to University, so I then got a job and trained to a chartered accountant whilst working. It was very low paid but, hey, who cares...they gave me experience and paid for my professional courses and exams. Now I have my own practice. Through work, I see all manner of personalities many of whom never had an academic bent but they are very successful all the same.

Animal studies does sound a great course for his strengths.