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Original poster

Was going private worth the money?

80 replies

wisecamel · 02/02/2011 22:02

Hi, I'm wondering whether it's worth going back to work in order to send DD (9) to a private secondary. She's quite bright, but no genius, has mild dyslexia and loves swimming, which she is talented at for her age.

No-one in my family or DH's has ever done this for their DCs, but I am tempted as I can tell which of my friends has been privately educated: they tend to have a kind of easy confidence which I would love to have myself and would certainly like my DC to have if possible.

We couldn't afford to pay loads, but probably could go to £15K per year if I returned to work, bearing in mind DS is two years younger so we'd need to do the same for him.

If you've put your DC through private school, do you honestly think it was worth it, not just for academic reasons?

OP posts:
Original poster
wisecamel · 02/02/2011 22:59

Crystal, I certainly don't want to start a fight! My privately educated friends can walk into any room full of people thinking, 'why wouldn't they like me? I'm interesting company and a good listener' whereas I and some of my state educated friends would think 'I hope I fit in and can say the right thing'!

I think that's the difference, but I don't know how the schools do it...I suppose that's what you pay for, or perhaps they just get it from their parents?

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Original poster
wisecamel · 02/02/2011 22:54

Litchick, I must admit I did watch it to see what the conclusion was! DD won't be living off us for years and years though doing internships so that might be a disadvantage.

I suppose I lack confidence and certainly felt like the token 'comp kid' at my university. Not sure how much confidence comes from your parents and how much from education though so she might be doomed anyway.

OP posts:
crystalglasses · 02/02/2011 22:53

My dd1 went to a highly selective school (top of league table). She was by no means top of the class and would possibly have achieved as much academically if she had gone to a state school; we will never know. She attributes her 'can do' attitude to her education and is very proud of her school. I don't want to get caught up in mn arguments for and against private education as it is like a red rag to a bull for some. On the whole we are glad that we sent her to private school because of the confidence and sense of self esteem she has.

However choose the school carefully. I have noticed that some private schools turn out arogant and snobbish pupils. These tend to be schools that are not academically selective and admission is based purely on parents' ability to pay.

Litchick · 02/02/2011 22:38

If you have just watched 'Who Gets The Best Jobs' you will see it is very much worth the money.

crazycarol · 02/02/2011 22:37

I am sending dd to a private school but it is too soon to tell if it was worth it. To date I am certainly not disappointed and do think it is money well spent.

I attended private school (for secondary only) and while I think I may have achieved similar grades at a state school, I remember on one occasion going for a summer job while at uni and when the interviewer looked at my CV he said "I see you went to XX school, when can you start?"

My sister has been involved in recruitment for a financial company. She told me recently about a series of interviews (graduate level recruitment) she did and the fact that they hired a guy who went to our school. I asked her if that had swayed her judgement, and she said absolutely not, however he was much better prepared for the interview than others who had done the same uni course, and when asked about why he wanted the job he talked about clubs that he went to at school whereas the other candidates couldn't talk about anything.

I went from PT to FT work in order to fund dd at school but I wouldn't just look at a private v state school dilemma, pick the the school that is right for your dc, that is what is most important.