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Year 7 dd asking to be home schooled. Don't know what to do

30 replies

tittybangbang · 03/11/2010 09:54

DD started at secondary in September and has been clamouring to leave for the last two weeks. From our point of view we can't see what the problem is: she's super confident, has made loads of new friends, her teachers think she's fantastic (music, English, science and drama at least).

The school has got a very, very rough intake but is well run and recently received an 'Outstanding' from Ofsted.

She's in top sets for everything but is cruising - I don't think her work is up to much: she's clever but very, very lazy and disorganised.

Years ago the subject of home schooling came up in a casual way and she's hooked on to that. I personally would LOVE to home school her. I only work p/t and am a qualified secondary school teacher. DD turned 11 in August and has a reading age of 15, reads a lot and is very musical. I feel I could do a lot with her, but DH is convinced it's a terrible idea. His view is that she's a lazy hard-head who doesn't take instruction well and that I'm too chaotic and disorganised to make a reasonable fist of it.

My aim would be to prepare her for entry to a performing arts college at 14 - there's a very good one near us that takes children from this age. I've found her a fantastic piano teacher who she's making good progress with and my sister would help out: she's a primary music specialist and a guitarist with a fair amount of experience of writing and recording music.

I don't think dd is being bullied or that there's any other social reason for her not wanting to stay. I just think she's not enjoying the way secondary is organised: the homework, the moving from room to room during the day, the fractured schedules, the complexity and breadth of the curriculum. I don't think the answer would be to move her and actually this isn't possible anyway as there is no decent school near us that doesn't have a waiting list as long as your arm.

Would very much appreciate you clever ladies thoughts on this. Especially if you've home schooled a child of this age.

Thanks!

Would very much appreciate

OP posts:
Acanthus · 03/11/2010 14:52

If she's only just started year 7 then she hasn't given secondary school much of a chance, has she. Can you leave it a while before you make the decision? Why is there a rush?

Young teens can be contrary. I remember being very academic and knowing I would try for Oxbridge. For a while at 14 or 15 I toyed with the idea of art college (by which I mean the local tech, nowhere high flying, I wasn't good enough and I knew that.) My parents, very wisely, let me talk about it for a while. In hindsight, I didn't really want to go, I just wanted to know that I could have the option if I wanted it. I went to Cambridge in the end Grin

IndigoBell · 03/11/2010 14:44

Go for it!

What have you got to lose? You can always put her back in school if it doesn't work out - but imagine if it did. Loads of time to do piano etc.

Be brave :)

(I'm very jealous. I'd love to homeschool, but my children don't want to.)

tittybangbang · 03/11/2010 11:58

Thanks FreudianSlimmery - will head that way 9didn't know there was a home ed board!)

OP posts:
FreudianSlimmery · 03/11/2010 10:33

BTW if you want to know the practical points of homeschooling at secondary you should start a thread on the home ed board on MN. Tis a lovely informative place!

FreudianSlimmery · 03/11/2010 10:03

I think it's quite unusual for a teenager to even think about homeschooling (most would say euwwww spending all day with mum, no way!) so I think it's really worth taking her seriously here.

How does she think it'd work though? Is she imagining it'd be doing whatever she wants all day? You need to have a really good talk about how you'd structure her time and learning, how she would socialise etc. Sounds like you need to have that talk with her dad too - maybe he has some misconceptions about homeschooled children?